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DDlg help..?


Princess Alli

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I'm a little, but I don't want to be. I love my Daddy and I love how safe he makes me feel and I love being in little space, but I can't do it without feeling like a bad person. Anyone who finds out that I used to be in a DD/lg relationship treats me like I'm a horrible person and I've committed a crime and I i can't do it anymore... I can't let myself feel this way while so many people have such a negative opinion of it..

I just want to stop being little, but I don't know how to. I need help...

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I can relate. I come from a very conservative family and I'm terrified to tell my family and friends about it. I have lots of trouble accepting my little side and often try to burry it. But what it boils down to is finding people who understand in irl people who are little too that you can be friends with because I don't think you can really stop. It seems like you're trusting the wrong people with info that they won't respect. And yeah it sucks that we can't tell everyone but not everyone will understand. I'm sorry if this reply was all over the place but my writings a bit off today. Hope it helped, and good luck.

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I'm new and while I do not know the ins and outs of it, I do feel that there is a stigma associated with this lifestyle.
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If being a little is something you feel that you are and your trying to bury it, that's basically being ashamed of who you are. Your not hurting anyone while embracing a side of you that others find is taboo. At the end of the day you have to live with the decisions you make. It boils down to will you be happy with who you are and embrace it and find those who embrace you flaws and all? Or will you hide who you are and be unhappy? It's your choice

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I know how you feel. There are people in my life I know I couldn't tell because they'd call me weird and not talk to me again let along my family knowing and forever thinking weird things about me.

I don't think I've ever fully been deep into little space if that makes sense. Just because of the guilt.

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I'm so sorry you're going through this Princess Alli. 

I know first hand how soul crushing the guilt and shame can be. 

It's pervasive. It takes what you love about yourself and turns it into self-loathing. I was there for almost a year after I started being in a DD/lg relationship and to this day it sometimes creeps its way up.  

 

The way I've found of fighting through this is realizing first and foremost you are not bad, wrong, or sick for being a little. 

Even when you feel like it and the rest of the world seems to agree. Second, if being a little makes you truly happy then you need to find others who respect that and make you happy too. 

Third, it's perfectly alright not tell people if you feel like they won't react well to the news.

I feel like there is a major push in our community to tell as many people as we can about your lifestyle choices but to be quite honest it's really no one's business in the first place. 

It's a major honor when we feel we can and should open up to someone about this but if they don't receive it like that then it's their loss, not ours. 

 

Also, as a side note, a lot of people say things they don't mean or truly understand about our group especially when they aren't aware they know someone inside of this community. 

A lot of the C/lg "hate" I feel actually stems from misunderstanding more than anything else.

 

*hugs* I hope no matter what you decide it will definitely you long term and make you truly happy.  
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I have an incredibly strong opinion on this matter and so it may not be quite this black/white for everyone. Please take it with a grain of salt, but I can't discuss just a portion of this and stay true to myself.

 

Irrespective of your lifestyle choices, a good friend will not cast judgement on something that they do not understand, and if you've gone so far as to talk to them about being Little they should be considerate and curious, not judgemental and ignorant. They don't have to fully understand it to respect your choices, nor do they have to be involved in any form. But to outright judge and dismiss a persons lifestyle is not the behaviour of a good friend.

 

I haven't shared this part of my life with friends or family IRL, but I know that they would respect me if I chose to. I don't think they necessarily want to know about this part of me however and so I don't. I wouldn't be friends with someone who I wouldn't be comfortable talking to about this though - I'd rather save my time, energy and love for those that I consider to deserve it, and those that return it unquestioningly no matter how I choose to live and to love.

 

No matter if you agree with this mentality or not, please don't try to change who you are for other people. This is your life. Own it.

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