Unconventional Little?: Where I fit in DDLG [Edited Repost]

[Guest WaterNymphh]

I've been battling this ever since I found out about DDLG.

 

Lemme try not to drag this out.

 

Background:

 

I found out about DDLG accidentally through tumblr. I didn't look into much because it was a bunch of meaningless letters to me. I've always been childish in nature and I always liked older boys, waaaay before I knew DDLG existed.

 

Anyway, I'm getting off track

 

---

 

When I found out about DDLG it was after I did the BDSM test. One of the things that scored high on the list was Boy/Girl (The Little archetype) and I was curious as heck so I did some research, and I came back full circle to DDLG on tumblr.

 

Unfortunately tumblr gave me my first impression of DDLG. But with more research and actually bumping into other Dom(mes) and the odd Little online I learned about the true nature of standard CG/L. As a newbie Little I mostly had cringey tumblr dialogue posts to go off of for what a DDLG relationship should be like.

 

Don't worry, that standard was quickly debunked for me, but I noticed a trend in Littles that I wasn't experiencing.

 

I didn't really act *Little* -- at least not in comparison to them.

 

Some Littles can be in Little Space so easily online with strangers and seemingly so often. They do the online roleplay, and the shy cutesy baby talk with excessive ellipses and stuttering...

(Not a jab at you adorable shy ones)

 

Little Space is just something so personal to me. Whenever I considered acting little amongst others, I just cringed inside because that's not really how I am -- I'm not Little 24/7, My Little age is something around 4-9 -- and I wasn't comfortable with people who aren't my DD or a close friend seeing such a vulnerable side of me.

 

I'm not sure if I'm just being an uptight, holier-than-thou loser but I've honestly never met a Little online who didn't portray themselves within their state of regression.

 

I sometimes don't even feel like a valid Little because I don't think I go into Little Space as often as some of these girls/guys do.

 

I don't even like the same things that most Littles I see like. Though that may just be because I have a higher Little Age and maybe the regression demographic is younger?

 

I don't know at this point. What do you guys think?

 

I'm honestly defeated.

[Guest Mr.Stuffykins]

This type of relationship and what defines a little is, to an extent, subjective. There is no set way of being and you shouldnt compare yourself to other littles. We are all different and you being more reserved does not question the validity of you being a little. You should not see other littles and think of them as being the definition of little. You're a little because of how you act with the people you choose to show (your daddy or those close to you) not by how frequently you choose to do so. Edited July 29, 2017 by Stuffykins

[Antoinette]

Wow okay just describe me then that's cool. 

 

Honestly, you're not being uptight whatsoever. If being little is something personal to you and something where you feel vulnerable and a state in which you can only be in around people you trust not only do I think this makes a lot of sense I also think it's smart.

 

When you throw your littleness around the internet without a second thought, or even in real life, you set yourself up for a whole lot of pain. I've never been the type of little to show my little side to people who I don't know, in fact I try to limit the amount of people who know about it - acting cold and distant to people who aren't in my small circle. It's lead to me being called a 'tsundere' by one of my close friends and to be quite honest it's not far from the truth.

 

However you express your littleness, whether it's a carefree explosion of cute glittery excitement to everybody and anybody or a shy smile to someone who you trust privately, you are still valid. Trust me. It's not that hard to be a little. It's just something you either are or you aren't - and there are a million and one variations on how you can be a little. 

[Guest WaterNymphh]

This type of relationship and what defines a little is, to an extent, subjective. There is no set way of being and you shouldnt compare yourself to other littles. We are all different and you being more reserved does not question the validity of you being a little. You should not see other littles and think of them as being the definition of little. You're a little because of how you act with the people you choose to show (your daddy or those close to you) not by how frequently you choose to do so.

 

But it's also what makes me so nervous to interact with other littles. Deep down I'm aware everyone is different, but on the surface I feel like I wont be able to make a connection with other Littles/Middles. Though, that may just be irrational fears feeding social anixety. Hehe ^^;

[Guest Mr.Stuffykins]

But it's also what makes me so nervous to interact with other littles. Deep down I'm aware everyone is different, but on the surface I feel like I wont be able to make a connection with other Littles/Middles. Though, that may just be irrational fears feeding social anixety. Hehe ^^;

Awe well i understand. Everything you say is understandable, but you shouldnt let the fear keep you from trying to meet others in this community(: if you feel that nervous about it then take it slow, okay? Dont rush into doing things.

 

If you ever feel alone please remember that im here for you okay? I may not be a little, but i will always try my best to help.

[Guest WaterNymphh]

Wow okay just describe me then that's cool. 

 

Honestly, you're not being uptight whatsoever. If being little is something personal to you and something where you feel vulnerable and a state in which you can only be in around people you trust not only do I think this makes a lot of sense I also think it's smart.

 

When you throw your littleness around the internet without a second thought, or even in real life, you set yourself up for a whole lot of pain. I've never been the type of little to show my little side to people who I don't know, in fact I try to limit the amount of people who know about it - acting cold and distant to people who aren't in my small circle. It's lead to me being called a 'tsundere' by one of my close friends and to be quite honest it's not far from the truth.

 

However you express your littleness, whether it's a carefree explosion of cute glittery excitement to everybody and anybody or a shy smile to someone who you trust privately, you are still valid. Trust me. It's not that hard to be a little. It's just something you either are or you aren't - and there are a million and one variations on how you can be a little. 

 

I see. That's actually a bit of a comfort knowing there are others who aren't the flowery type. It was foolish of me to think otherwise. Thanks ^^

[Guest WaterNymphh]

Awe well i understand. Everything you say is understandable, but you shouldnt let the fear keep you from trying to meet others in this community(: if you feel that nervous about it then take it slow, okay? Dont rush into doing things.

 

If you ever feel alone please remember that im here for you okay? I may not be a little, but i will always try my best to help.

 

Thanks a lot. ^^

[BakedPotato]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with how any little is with *their* little space. No matter how often or few times you go into little space, no matter how many people you're comfortable being around, no matter what specifically makes you feel little- it is your little space. ^-^

 

I think the biggest reason why you see so many littles being super little online, is because for so many of them, it's one of the few places they feel they can be little. ^^

 

Personally, I feel little 95% of the time. x.x so I will always seem little online. That's me. You're you. C: There are tons of other littles who are like you, and I guarantee you that your topic is going to make those littles very happy. Most littles feel alone in some way, because no little is the same. There's going to always be something that makes us feel we aren't "little enough". The important thing is to do what you did and seek support and advice. Because every little is enough. As long as you're you- you're enough. ^^

[Nymph]

My "little" age is 12 and you can either say that I don't have little space or that I am in it 24/7, it's just part of my personality. Of course there will be times I feel more playful than others, sometimes in a more innocent way and sometimes in a more sexual way but it all still applies.

 

I think you should stop worrying too much about narrowing down the labels, this is a very open lifestyle. If you want to get OCD with it, the result will ALWAYS be that you are a special snowflake... because everyone is different in the end.

 

Also keep in mind that for example with pictures, a girl with a paci will stand out a lot more than a girl dressed up with cute clothes and a hello kitty bracelet. The extremes always stand out more!! My favorite scarf is a hello kitty one that Daddy gifted me on christmas in front of my whole family for example...and nobody noticed, they just thought it was a red scarf. I have pink hair but that is "fashionable" right now so nobody bats an eye. I sometimes call Daddy by his title in public but we are married and with a child so people assume I am talking in behalf of our son

 

I have met littles who are tomboys, some more into goth stuff, a few dominant ones even. Nobody will judge you here, be yourself, do what you like and you will eventually find someone perfect for you :3

[DaddyStevie]

Hey WaterNymphh,

I think it's perfectly natural that you would only feel most comfortable being so vulnerable when you're in the safety and familiarity of your own home. And if you think about it with regard to the kinkier side that often goes with this lifestyle, most of us wouldn't act kinky in public but would behind closed doors, for me it's a similar thing.

 

As for connecting with other littles, there's nothing to say you have to be Little around them either, always be yourself. But maybe the distance and anonymity of being online might help you to venture out of your comfort zone a bit. And besides, no one here will be judging you

[Little_Ghoul]

My best friend is a lot like you. She doesn't like sharing her little side around anyone other than her DD and me. She finds her little self to be extraordinarily personal and that does not make her any less of a little! There are plenty of others out there like you so please don't feel less than. You are perfect at being your own kind of little. None of this is written in stone; we're all trying to figure this and our dynamics out. Even those who look like they have it all together are still learning and probably feel like they don't fit the "mold" of being a little perfectly.

 

I hope you feel better <3 

Emma  

[Guest infinitecases]

Everyone's different and it's not strange to be like that I'm only little around my Daddy, I find it really awkward to be like that around other people since I'm different normally. If you're comfortable only being little with certain people then it's completely okay!! I'd never be able to act little with strangers online, since my mindset is really specific to having my Daddy there or thinking about him when I'm alone. 

 

A lot of littles online seem to advocate liking pacifiers, diapers + sippy cups but everyone likes different things. I've personally never seen the appeal but each to their own, it doesn't make you any less of a little than those you see posting pictures etc I've also never enjoyed the more little spelling and typing by missing out letters but I still consider myself little when my Daddy is around! Every little is still an individual  

[rbbrducky73]

Without reading what others have written so I don't become distracted or influenced I want to say THANK YOU!

I too, find my little side to be a very private, personal and vulnerable state of being. I do not post in my little state, because I cannot get there with strangers. That is probably why I've been part of this forum but have spent most of my time only reading and rarely posting.

I have only found my little side less than a year ago and only with/because of who my Daddy is.

[Guest WaterNymphh]

Hey WaterNymphh,

I think it's perfectly natural that you would only feel most comfortable being so vulnerable when you're in the safety and familiarity of your own home. And if you think about it with regard to the kinkier side that often goes with this lifestyle, most of us wouldn't act kinky in public but would behind closed doors, for me it's a similar thing.

 

As for connecting with other littles, there's nothing to say you have to be Little around them either, always be yourself. But maybe the distance and anonymity of being online might help you to venture out of your comfort zone a bit. And besides, no one here will be judging you

Being online does sort of help, believe it or not. And that is sort of why I came here, so thank you ^^ 

[Guest WaterNymphh]

My best friend is a lot like you. She doesn't like sharing her little side around anyone other than her DD and me. She finds her little self to be extraordinarily personal and that does not make her any less of a little! There are plenty of others out there like you so please don't feel less than. You are perfect at being your own kind of little. None of this is written in stone; we're all trying to figure this and our dynamics out. Even those who look like they have it all together are still learning and probably feel like they don't fit the "mold" of being a little perfectly.

 

I hope you feel better <3 

Emma  

 

 

Everyone's different and it's not strange to be like that I'm only little around my Daddy, I find it really awkward to be like that around other people since I'm different normally. If you're comfortable only being little with certain people then it's completely okay!! I'd never be able to act little with strangers online, since my mindset is really specific to having my Daddy there or thinking about him when I'm alone. 

 

A lot of littles online seem to advocate liking pacifiers, diapers + sippy cups but everyone likes different things. I've personally never seen the appeal but each to their own, it doesn't make you any less of a little than those you see posting pictures etc I've also never enjoyed the more little spelling and typing by missing out letters but I still consider myself little when my Daddy is around! Every little is still an individual

 

I suppose I'm not alone on these things, thank you both <3

[Guest WaterNymphh]

Without reading what others have written so I don't become distracted or influenced I want to say THANK YOU!

I too, find my little side to be a very private, personal and vulnerable state of being. I do not post in my little state, because I cannot get there with strangers. That is probably why I've been part of this forum but have spent most of my time only reading and rarely posting.

I have only found my little side less than a year ago and only with/because of who my Daddy is.

Congrats on the awakening of your Little side! I hope he treats you well, and I'm trying to engage myself, but I find myself just lurking posts and whatnot. It's a bit difficult to jump in on a discussion uninvited, y'know? Anyway, good luck ^^

[Guest Daddyskitten65]

This is exactly how I feel. I'm really just me and only act little around my Daddy. I want little friends but sometimes it's hard because I want to have adult conversations and talk about life and such. I work full time and am in college, I spend most of my day as an adult. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm playful and life to have fun, that I like some kid type things but that's just me.

[rbbrducky73]

Congrats on the awakening of your Little side! I hope he treats you well, and I'm trying to engage myself, but I find myself just lurking posts and whatnot. It's a bit difficult to jump in on a discussion uninvited, y'know? Anyway, good luck ^^