Hello! :D Lesbian Little from Australia ^-^

[Maxibon]

Hello, everyone! I just joined ^-^ 

 

My name is Gigi. I'm an eighteen-year-old from Australia. I've been into DDLG since I was thirteen, though I had soon realised that my ideals behind it were wrong. So, now I'm back, fully-consensual and totally against any child involvement, ahah. I'm also lesbian

 

Unlike many Littles, I do not have a specific age. I knew that I was Little since I first got into DDLG, but I never understood age-regression. That is, until a few weeks ago. My girlfriend confessed that she once almost called herself "Daddy", and we both liked the idea, so we started calling each other "Daddy" (we switch- when one is feeling Little, the other will adopt a Daddy role). Then, what started as a "daddy kink", I turned into a complete non-sexual CGLO dynamic in my head, discovering my Little side and properly age-regressing for the first time! 

 

Despite only age-regressing for the first time recently, I have always possessed a youthful nature. I am always called "innocent", and I don't like meanness, anger, swearing, drugs, alcohol, dark humour, etc. I like pure things! I've always been attracted to things like play equipment, colouring/drawing tools, bright/pastel colours, etc. and I tend to connect more with kids way younger than me, than kids my age. I tend to have a more childlike perspective on life, and I am very oblivious and absent-minded. I can be very sensitive, and, although I don't like to admit it, I always want attention from those that I am closely attached to. I kind of need a sense of direction, and to be instructed very thoroughly, unless I'm completely and utterly doing things on my own. I need advice and reassurance a lot. And there are times when all of these become heightened, that I used to think was just a "mood"; much like being happy is a mood.

 

For years, my family has always told me variants of, "You don't act your age," in the sense that I act younger. Just today, my mum told me that I don't act mature like other kids my age, and that even my walk was "different". Because I have always seemed childish, for several years, I had been convinced that I was on the Autism Spectrum, as my family refers to people with ASD as possessing "the mind of someone younger than they really are", and my grandfather is a doctor, my uncle having ASD. I've been trying to ask/speak to them about it for all this time, but they always tell me that I was tested and didn't have it. I was so confused, until I found out about age-regression, and how it can be completely independent from ASD. 

 

Now, since discovering the Little in me, I've felt so much more sure about myself, like I know who I am now, and I can be myself. I've only gone into full Little mode twice, though. Once that first time, and twice earlier today (I recorded a vlog that I will most likely never post). It's because my mum wouldn't understand, so I'm scared to allow myself to express myself when I'm in Little Space around her (which is almost always), but I still get into the Little headspace, my texting style changes, and I still try to dress as Little as I possibly can without it warranting my mum to say something about it.

 

In fact, I think my family might actually be the cause of my age-regression. However, it's not related to trauma, or PTSD, so I don't know. I was always told that I was sweet and nice and kind when I was little. That I was always smiling. And that they wished I could be like that again (instead of a stroppy, snarky teenager, I suppose). Plus, a mix of my own core values of "I'm never going to act like that when I become a teenager! It's unnecessary and rude!" and I suppose that, when I discovered my attitude was starting to shift into something more arrogant and snappy, I wasn't happy. And I felt like I was disappointing my family. So, I wanted to be like I was when I was little. And I suppose my means of doing that was to regress back to my younger self, possessing my demeanour and attitude of then. I also find it very rewarding, because acting cute and nice makes me happy, and it also make others smile, which I take as being youthful is good. 

 

But, for any Littles who might be reading this, does anyone else get told to "act your age!" from family, friends, fellow students/teachers/co-workers? How do you deal with this?