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ʚ♡ɞ Wanting to be.."Spoiled"? ʚ♡ɞ


-SoftBunny-

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Hi Littles & Caregivers, I hope everyone is doing well!

 

So I've been asking myself for 1 year now what I'm about to talk with you and let me say that it makes me very "uncomfortable" & shy.

To began with it I want to say that I'm in the DDLG Community for 2 years now with my Daddy & we are very in love!(*ฅ́˘ฅ̀*)

 

My question is: How can I initiate my Daddy to..."spoil me"?

 

Don't get me wrong: I'm the type of person who REAAAALLY don't want other people to buy me something even if it's 25 cents. It makes me feel guilty and sometimes uncomfortable because this person could spend their money in something else..

I never ask for something, only if I really need it! Now I know it can seems a little bit strange because I say that I don't want something and then say I want it. (ー ー;  )

 

To be more clear, my Daddy spoil me in many ways and I'm very grateful!! I do receive gifts on special days like christmas, V-Day, easter, ect, but they not related to DDLG stuff.. What I really want (& that's why I need solutions to my "problem") is my Daddy to "spoil" me with for example: plushies, sippy cup, pacifier, ect, without being a gift for a "special day". Each time we were at a store, I would show him what could make me very happy (and that I don't have in my small collection) but it ended with me not have it or me buying it because I was to shy to ask... (my fault)

We already talked about it (communication is very important to us teehee♡) & he told me that he knew that it would make me very happy but also very shy & maybe also "uncomfortable" so he doesn't do it. But he also told me that he understand what it could mean to me. He also said to me that I should ask but it makes me feel so bad to ask something. It makes me feel bad because I don't want him to think that I will always ask for something, start being a "needy person", ect.  So I said that even if i'm shy I just really want to have something that is related to ddlg but also who mean that it's Daddy who buy it for his little girl because she need it without asking. Since then, well it didn't change...

 

Recently my only sippy break off & I needed a toy to chew on it. I talked 1 or 2 times about it to him (has a hint..) but It finished by me buying my chew toy alone because he didn't wanted to go with me this time & I was very sad... When it's about my littlespace\ little universe it is very important to me. Like A LOT. Normally he's very understanding and he make sure to be with me when we go looking for my littlespace stuff. He didn't wanna go with me I can understand that. But since it's rare we do it I thought he could give an effort. I didn't wanted to force him either so I just went by myself.

 

Otherwise, since he told me to ask (even if I want him to "spoil" me because he wants to do it not because I ask him..) I was wondering how can I say it without actually saying "Daddy can you bought it for me?" " Daddy can I have it?" (I tried this one but I ended buying it myself..). I don't want it to sound like a "spoiled girl" (to my eyes!) & feel bad about it. I would like something that would make me feel confident and not needy. Does someone have tips? I really need help with this..

 

 

Edited by -SoftBunny-
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Hi Softbunny!

 

Maybe you and him could set up a special code-word. Like a safe word, but to be used when you want something but don't want to spell it out.

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Guest QueenJellybean

first of all, i want to commend you for being able to advocate for what you want, even if it's scary & makes you uncomfortable.


i'm glad you were able to have a few meta-talks with your partner about your needs not being met. 


if you've already communicated that & he hasn't initiated, there isn't much you can do, unfortunately. 


 


i like the idea of a code word!


i'd also suggest a wish list, if you don't already have one, that he can choose off of


or look through to see what you might like. 


if you're both comfortable, i'd even consider making it an informal rule that you can earn something small as a surprise once a month


based off good behavior or chores!


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Hi Softbunny!

 

Maybe you and him could set up a special code-word. Like a safe word, but to be used when you want something but don't want to spell it out.

 

I actually think this is a really good idea! That way it doesn't make you sound spoiled and will help you feel more comfortable expressing your needs. It also "spells it out" for your Daddy (because sometimes... lets face it... guys don't understand unless you tell them directly!)

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

 

Junebug xxx

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Hi! I just wanted to say that I talked about it to my Daddy & he was very happy to see that I took all my courage to bring this to him and for searching solutions!!C: yay!

He loved the idea of a safe word so I can ask without being too shy!

 

Thank you very much!! :wub: :wub:

 

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I like everything being an improvement process for the little or for myself...

Make a 'little currency', some token(s) depending on how many you want to use per week. Decorate them!

You automatically get all the tokens on a specific day of the week.

Give him a token when you want/need something specific. He will know it's important to you because you are using the token, and won't let you buy it alone.

He wants you to break out of your shell a bit by asking. Hopefully with the token being the focus, you will be more apt to ask and not hint.

You want a little surprise every once in a while. He can 'capture' a token by giving you a little surprise.

You win the game when both of you get bored of tokens because you no longer need them to do these things

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