Becoming too big/ independent

[Hearteyes]

So my daddy and I got married about 8 months ago

And he is so good about teaching me and training me how to do stuff better

Before I didn’t even know how to cook or balance a budget or anything

But as time goes on I learn what he teaches me and I am becoming more responsible even daddy agrees

But I also feel like I’m becoming less little ? Like I second guess myself for being ‘too needy’ or push myself to work harder even when I’m exhausted because in my head there’s this picture of a perfect wife I’m trying to uphold

Any other littles struggle with balancing big life and still being little ?

How do you guys get into little space when you’re really stressed/busy ??

[Guest QueenJellybean]

so, the fact of the matter is that we are adults. 

so learning the adult things is good! + it doesn't have to take away from little time if you view 

little time + big time as different modes, which is sort of what i think you're already doing.

reward yourself for doing the big stuff by being small!

even if you have to budget the time out.

 

i think about being small as my stress relief, or self-care. 

if i've worked all day in my big girl clothing, made dinner, cleaned the house, done the shopping. 

when i get home, i'm kicking off this bra + putting on a onesie with my ninetendo switch. 

treat it like self-care + you'll thank yourself, i promise.

[Hearteyes]

 

 

so, the fact of the matter is that we are adults.

so learning the adult things is good! + it doesn't have to take away from little time if you view

little time + big time as different modes, which is sort of what i think you're already doing.

reward yourself for doing the big stuff by being small!

even if you have to budget the time out.

i think about being small as my stress relief, or self-care.

if i've worked all day in my big girl clothing, made dinner, cleaned the house, done the shopping.

when i get home, i'm kicking off this bra + putting on a onesie with my ninetendo switch.

treat it like self-care + you'll thank yourself, i promise.

Ahhh this helps me so much you don’t even know ! Thank you. That balance is exactly what I need to find.

My anxiety always tells me I can’t rest/ do self care because there’s always more work that can be done so I’m not setting aside time to be little like I want to be.

But i wanna try viewing it as a reward to relax after the hard work and I think that will help me feel less guilty / like I’m being selfish

[LittleTeacup]

I'm also becoming more responsible and capable as I get older. But being little is kind of a personality trait for me. I can quickly switch in and out between little and big, mainly based on how serious the thing I'm doing is. (And if I'm really stressed, I will puff my cheeks out and stomp my feet, away from other eyes if necessary.)

 

One example: yesterday I had to drive to the county health benefits office to hand in some papers. Yes, it was a Big activity. But, I giggled and talked to myself the whole drive there. On some trips I sing songs to myself too. Whenever you're driving you have space to be little as long as it doesn't interfere with safety. Listen and sing to Little music. Point out a funny bird or street sign to yourself and laugh.

 

Also I'm finding that Big me is where all my anxiety and negative self-talk come from. Little me is full of self-love and doesn't care as much what other people think. When I find that I'm doubting myself and being negative and worried about what other people might think, I'm learning to let my Little voice through who says "who cares? This is what I want. I will survive. Why should I do what you say?"

 

So where does the image of "perfect wife" come from? If it's causing you stress to conform, it didn't come from you. When you're exhausted, rest. Don't push yourself harder. I promise, your husband/daddy would rather you be happy and making a few mistakes than stressed out and upset but "perfect".

[Hearteyes]

I'm also becoming more responsible and capable as I get older. But being little is kind of a personality trait for me. I can quickly switch in and out between little and big, mainly based on how serious the thing I'm doing is. (And if I'm really stressed, I will puff my cheeks out and stomp my feet, away from other eyes if necessary.)

 

One example: yesterday I had to drive to the county health benefits office to hand in some papers. Yes, it was a Big activity. But, I giggled and talked to myself the whole drive there. On some trips I sing songs to myself too. Whenever you're driving you have space to be little as long as it doesn't interfere with safety. Listen and sing to Little music. Point out a funny bird or street sign to yourself and laugh.

 

Also I'm finding that Big me is where all my anxiety and negative self-talk come from. Little me is full of self-love and doesn't care as much what other people think. When I find that I'm doubting myself and being negative and worried about what other people might think, I'm learning to let my Little voice through who says "who cares? This is what I want. I will survive. Why should I do what you say?"

 

So where does the image of "perfect wife" come from? If it's causing you stress to conform, it didn't come from you. When you're exhausted, rest. Don't push yourself harder. I promise, your husband/daddy would rather you be happy and making a few mistakes than stressed out and upset but "perfect".

I’m the same way! Litttle me is all smiles and laughs and big me is all self doubt and anxiety

Imma try that tho

When I’m driving to work tonight I’m gonna jam out to my Disney tunes and try to relax a lil

[Maids]

You have no idea how much this post helped me out... thank you so much for bringing this some attention!

Working 28 hour per week is very taxing on my little self so I am very thankful to have found this post.   

Lately I've been bringing my journal with me and a colouring page with me to work so on my breaks I can lock up and have me time (it's a very small and intimate store and you work by yourself 80% of the time.) we also have a pop-station playing all the time so I find myself doing little wiggly dances and singing. 

Bubble baths with some toys in there are very helpful for when you're exhausted but still want to be little. You don't always have to do stuff in your littlespace, sometimes I'm so beat down that I just want some bite sized snacks, apple juice, and some Netflix kids haha.

But yes, just like the above replies have said, think of it like self care and it will relieve the pressure of trying to 'force' the littlespace mindset onto you. That will relieve some unnecessary stress that may be blocking you from enjoying your littleness.   

[Guest Baby_Kitty9818]

My Daddy and I have actually talked about this type of thing. I'll start being big for school and having to be big for stuff, and then I start worrying about it. He has reassured me more than once that I will always be his little girl.