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Relationship advice please


sleepylittlemoo

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Hello! I'd like some advice on what to do. I'm in a ddlg relationship and it seems like my daddy doesn't want to be an actual daddy. He has no problem when it gets sexual, but then after he is tired and can't do anything. I've been begging him for 6 or more months for some real non sexual little time. Not interrupted by anything sexual and it hasnt happened. He says he's too tired and drained to do it, but he's never too tired to get sexual. I feel neglected and dejected. Ive asked him many times if he likes ddlg and he says yes, but it just doesn't feel that way. I pretend to be in little space with him sometimes now when he is "in the mood". I'm starting to feel shame in my little side. It helped me cope with past trauma and is my only escape from my stress. I feel overwhelmed. I dont know what to do anymore.
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Actions speak louder than words and from what you've said it seems like his actions are saying he likes the idea of DDlg as a sexual kink versus DDlg as a relationship dynamic. Not everyone who likes DDlg in a sexual or bedroom sense likes it as a non-sexual dynamic as well. If that's what his preference is that is his choice but he should be honest about it with you.

 

If you've tried talking to him about it, and it sounds like you have, you may need to accept that he may never change. If that is the case you need to decide what you want from the relationship and if you're unhappy then you already know what the options are:

 

1) stay and continue feeling unhappy and ashamed, or

2) leave and look for a relationship that provides what you're looking for.

 

You can't change someone who doesn't want to change. Best of luck and hopefully you find what you're seeking.

 

Little kaiya

Edited by Little kaiya
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I agree with the majority of what Kaiya has told you.

 

With one bit of alternative advice-

Yes he may be into DD/lg only in the sexual sense, which is obviously disappointing for you if that’s the case.

But it doesn’t mean guaranteed misery. There’s things you can do by yourself in your Little time, there’s a bunch of suggestions floating around the forum.

There are also things you can do that are Little-like without regressing or necessarily being in Little Space.

They’re not perfect solutions, but it might be a way to compromise if you otherwise want to be with him.

 

I know in an ideal world he would be enthusiastic about being your Daddy outside of the bedroom as much as he is in it. And I totally understand feeling neglected over him pulling the energy outta his ass like magic if it means he gets to bone. The promise of coitus if he plays along is very motivational, lol

Have you considered withholding from him to exacerbate the message that you’re unhappy? If bumping uglies is the only way he will appeal to your Little side, maybe stop giving him that privilege and see if that drives it into his head?

 

Edit: spelling correction.

Edited by Guest
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Guest MonsterDaddy

I didn't read the above replies so forgive me if this is redundant.

 

In my experience, I've found that the things or people I don't commit to are the very things or people that are not a fit for me. I cannot be sure as I dont know you or him, but it certainly sounds like he's not invested because it isnt important to him. Thats not to say that you are not important to him, but it also shouldn't be discounted. When i find something or someone who fits me, I'm all in. I believe that is true for most people.

 

I hope you find the joy that comes with being little in a big world, with a man who encourages and nurtures you to be who you are.

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I agree with Pox. Maybe withholding the sexual aspect from him.

Maybe if you say daddy I want to be little or do little thing completely non sexual for a bit.

Be 100% in your feelings

Maybe bring up how it makes you ashamed? Have a very open and honest conversation.

I would say everything you said to us! If he can play in bed he has time and motivation for other things!

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