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Hi! Hello! Your friendly neighbourhood Soul here! I’ve been watching a trend unfold lately—like clockwork. Folks jumping from Dom to Dom, little to little, grabbing at anything shiny that might feel like connection, like home. It’s not my place to tell anyone how to live their dynamic, but I do feel the need to drop a little mythological wisdom into the mix. Let’s talk Icarus. You remember him—the boy with wax wings and dreams bigger than caution. His father warned him: “Don’t fly too close to the sun.” But the thrill got to him. The heat of excitement. The rush of soaring. He wanted it all, now. And we know how that story ends. Too many in our world are doing the same thing. Rushing into titles, diving headfirst into roles before trust has even had time to stretch its legs. They chase “mine” without giving it time to grow into something mutual, something real. And then they wonder why they end up hurt, or disillusioned, or lost. This lifestyle isn’t a fast-track to fantasy fulfillment. It’s about intention, not just intensity. It's slow-burn, not fireworks. The kind of dynamic that lasts—the kind that nourishes—is built, not grabbed. So, if you're out there flapping your wings, feeling that urge to fly higher, faster—pause. Check the wax. Remember the sun. Find your sky partner who flies with you, not just the first one who tosses glitter in your direction. Be patient. Be deliberate. Because what’s truly yours? It won't melt your wings to reach it. —Soul 🪽 🔥 ☀️

Hey guys 👋🏼 As most of you know by now - I work at a financial institution. I work VERY closely with people about their personal finances and that can be a very sensitive thing for majority of people. Especially with deaths in the family , people being low income ect. My job can be mentally exhausting and draining. No matter how hard this career can be - it’s my favorite line of work I’ve ever been in and I think I want this to be a lifelong career. I absolutely LOVE helping others , especially my tight nit community small town. I’m very blessed to work in the town that I live in. Naturally - this means a lot of clients know me from inside work and outside work (community events and me just being a goober talking to people when I’m out and about.) I love spreading positive energy and being there for people through hard times , and what happens more than I realize is how much I help people without even knowing it until later - if at all. A client came in during a huge rush , everyone was busy and there was a line out the door. The gentleman sat down and let everyone else go in front of him and I was curious why he would do that. After him waiting almost 20-30 minutes - the building was clear (about 5 people walked in after him and formed a new line , and he did this in front of everyone in the building now.) and he came up to my desk. I was ready to start handling cash for him and he goes “Hey , slow down a second. I want your attention.” I was shocked and I was like I’m so sorry ! It’s really busy so I’m just geared up and ready to go , so you have something going on that you’d need to sit in a private cubicle for ? He shook his head and told me no , he just wanted to make sure I was paying attention. He pulled out three pieces of paper and kept them in his hands , and while it might not be word for word because I got so emotional … he said : “You have no idea how much you mean to me , and to this community. Our small town bank needed someone like you to finally show up - the envelope you gave me my cash in the last time you helped me said “spread joy and stay positive”. My son died 15 years ago on that day you helped me and gave me that envelope and that was my son’s motto. That day was very emotional and difficult for me and I was so curt with you that day , and you did nothing but treat me with love. My son only ever wanted to spread joy and positivity to others and he worked with the church helping the community doing exactly that. I cried and cried and remembered my son’s life motto through you. I brought you this picture , this saying my son and I used to say to people , and a picture of my deceased son. I hope you know how special you are and you are living proof that my son is still here with me everyday and so is his message he spread everywhere. Thank you for being the little angel you are.” I cried , he cried , he told my co workers and managers how special I am , then I continued to sob like a fucking baby. Even when my home life , work life is hard , the mental stress and exhaustion is too much … I still always choose to treat people with love , gentleness and the kindness I wish I would’ve been treated with my whole life. It’s not always easy , but moments of tenderness and pure love like I had with this gentleman … it just makes me want to be that much more kind and pure and spread my love as far as my arms can reach. Sure , I make business deals , I make over 1mm$ deals , I touch hundreds of thousands of dollars every day in my career. None of it matters. Moments like this with my clients is what truly matters to me. Always remember , being kind is worth it. You may never see the results - or you may see them a day later or weeks later. It’s always worth it. These are the pictures he left and quote / excuse me while I go cry some more over my lunch.

We had another great turnout for the contest and the voting. I want to thank everyone for joining in and hopefully enjoying themselves. A big congratulations to last month's winner This month's contest will end on July 27th I will be starting a poll on or around the 28th and letting y'all pick the winner. * You can also look in my gallery at my coloring pages album where you will find all the coloring pages I've posted for contests. https://www.ddlgforum.com/gallery/album/5986-coloring-pages/ If you do not see anything you want to color feel free to find your own pic elsewhere and color it. Or draw and color your own. Guidelines 1. Must be your own handiwork. *You can add designs to blank sections and spruce it up if you feel inspired to 2. Must be submitted by the deadline. 3. Only 1 entry per member. You may color and upload all the pictures but let us know which is your entry. 4. Post your art on this thread or if you have trouble with that message a member of staff and we will be happy to assist you. Save the image(s) below. You can print it out to color it or use an app. Using a layer capable program/app Import (paste) the coloring page image. Set it as the top layer. Add a few layers under it. Set top layer (coloring page) to "Multiply" You should be able to color/erase easier, without affecting the lines. Free Apps: Sketches, Prismajoy and Sketchbook. Another app recommended by a member is ibis Paint X. PC: Gimp (that’s basically all I’ve used), MS Paint, Photoshop etc. Krita has also been recommended by a member. Recolor is an app suggested by one of our members who was kind enough to supply this link. https://www.recolor.com/ If you have suggestions for apps to use please comment them and I will try to remember to add them to the list. Good luck and happy coloring.

my entry

I THINK I MET A LITTLE IN THE WILD !!!! YOU GUYS ! We (myself , Dad and Brother) were at the arcade and I heard these girls talking and looking at me over their shoulders as I walked by and I thought they were being mean cause they kept looking at me and talking towards each other , but then after I mean mugged them one of the girls said they were talking about my outfit and they thought I looked cute. I fixed my face immediately and said thank you and we talked about our outfits for a moment. I shortly after saw them trying to win a figure and getting frustrated. I whispered to Dad that they were really kind to me and I wanted to be kind back to them… It was a cute anime girl figure and the one right next to it looked like her style too , I’m really good at them so I won the cute figure right next to them in a couple tries and I walked up to them , smiled real big with my eyes shut and handed it to them. She looked so confused and said thank you over and over and so did her friend. Later on she came up to me and apologized for interrupting my mojo on the figure games and I told her it was okay , she looked at me real nervous and blankly then handed me a piece of paper. She asked if I wanted her to hold all my figures while I looked at it and I said “YES !!!” I shoved all my winnings into her arms , and the piece of paper was her “name” (I think it’s a little name) and she drew me a picture !!!!! 😭and it says “you rock!!!” I squealed and said “It’s so cute !!! I love it !!! I’m going to keep this FOREVER 👹” she giggled and handed me back my figures and she said she thinks I’m really nice and it was super generous and cool of me to just hand over a figure to her like that. I told her “I just like spreading kindness and joy around and you were so nice to me first. I’m happy I gave it to you!” We exchanged really big smiles and giggles and she went back to her group. I wanted to ask for her phone number so bad so we could be friends. Or ask her if she was a little too … I was too nervous and scared and I could tell we were both really overstimulated and excited. I hope I meet her in the wild again , but I really think I made a little friend in the wild !!!!! This is what she drew me ! It’s a stingray and a turtle riding around from its tail ! 😭🥰🐒 I believe “Bob” is her Daddy’s name who was with her and the bunny name is her little name , or maybe I’m just too excited about my interaction ? What do you guys think ?!

Here is my entry for this month Because its SHARK WEEK! Sorry I'm so excited plus my daddy likes sharks

Well I went to my therapist yesterday that I've been seeing for 16 years and told her how I was little and into Ddlg. I was so nervous telling her this because I was afraid that she would be disappointed in me. But happily she was not and was genuinely curious and happy that I was happy. She had lots of questions and I tried answering them to the best of my ability. I'm pretty positive I did okay lol. I was honest and told her about my Daddy. She found it fine and healthy. It was a really good session and I even shared it with my Daddy. Have any of you told a therapist about ddlg or any of your kinks?

This is so true, it is a relationship that you build with someone, regardless if they say it's just a dynamic. Feelings will always come into play when entering a dynamic or relationship whichever way you want to call it. I'm so sorry you dont feel valued or even worthy. Remember we are here for you, you have a giant community behind you that will support you. Please remember you truly do matter, you are worthy of love and you are valued.

My entry

I did another one... actually had some time to color!!!

Ok... this is not my entry, just a picture I colored!

@SweetLittleDreamer entry she was unable to post it from her devices

here's my entry

To all my beautiful friends and community family members on here Thank you all for standing behind me as I slowly find my way back to who I used to be Thank you for cheering me on and checking in on me If I could hug you all I would! Thank you for never giving up on me All of you have a special place in my heart ❤️ Thank you Always in your corner Miss Anna

I am going to start with the thought that rings in my mind the most when reading your post : Do the labels of what you’re wishing to build (relationship or dynamic) really matter if one party is being left feeling the way you currently feel ? Not being valued , not feeling worthy , as though you’re a convenience rather than a partner. In my humble opinion before I even get into anything - it doesn’t matter. Neither of these labels matter if you feel the way you do and it will cause you damage in the long run and is not worth the blips of happiness you might catch in your net in between feeling unvalued and unworthy. No label matters if both parties aren’t putting equal energy into each other to begin with. I think you should sit with that a little bit - are you grasping at labels to try and create something to grab onto instead of letting it fade ? Even the most shallow interactions between people have equal rewards (to the parties involved - outsiders may disagree) such as sugar babies and sugar daddies , as the simplest example. Do you think a sugar daddy would continue to provide his sugar if he’s not getting any sugar in return ? Maybe if the guy is massively desperate for emotional or physical intimacy … but eventually that will dwindle as well. Along with the funds. I also consider if this was flipped. What if you were a female and a little that was making a post like this - being vulnerable and opening up about how you feel so unappreciated. Everyone would be up in arms and I’m sure much more people would reply how the Caregiver is an asshole and you should move on. Guess what I’m gunna say ? This chick is an asshole - and you should move on and invest time into yourself , whatever that looks like. Just from this post alone , I have no doubts that you have expressed your wants and desires - as well as possible outcomes for whatever ends up being your label. And I’m gunna be an asshole and say - does this chick even know the true definitions ? I’ll lay out Websters - my all time favorite book besides the one that shall not be named. Understandably , dynamic is going to be interpreted differently even though there is a literal definition. In my world - a dynamic is an exchange between two people. An equal exchange of forces and power where both sides benefit. A dynamic happens WITHIN a relationship. The two are intertwined in my world but I understand that there are people that separate them - but as @shadowrider stated … that only lasts so long before the dynamic shifts - one person demands more and it either fizzles out - blows up - or turns into a relationship. One cannot survive long without the other - they’re symbiotic labels in the end and one will shrivel up and die if the other is not treated with care. There is a reason people will call relations between two people “one sided” at times. One person is in it for the dynamics (exchanges between two people) and the other is in it for the possible relationship. My question is - do you put up with the behavior from this person that leads you feeling unworthy and undervalued so you have a person , a “friend” or the idea that you might be able to obtain a relationship ? If that is the case - this person is not a friend and not someone I would suggest you keep entertaining. From an outsider looking in - especially you being so obviously heartfelt and loving … this person isn’t a friend. If you’ve discussed how you felt with them and their answer was cold and “we have a dynamic not a relationship” … run for the hills. This is the type of person that will bang your door down when they need something but when YOU are bleeding out - they’ll shrug , say you’re not their problem and walk away. If you’re not in a “relationship” then why would they care to be there anyways ? Having this type of mindset in the DDLG world , to ME specifically is a huge red flag. I am probably the biggest and loudest advocate for men that the site has - and this type of shit makes me angry. Genuine men who want to care for someone being treated like this can break them down and destroy their hope of finding a little - or turn them into straight up monsters. Of course I only have the context that you provided … but to me it sounds like you’re being played like a fiddle. If someone ever said this to me when I'm pouring myself into building something , regardless of the label … please let the door hit your ass when I walk you out of my space and heart. No amount of “dynamic” activities (Ddlg activities that partners share) would ever fix the unworthy feeling it would create. In fact , it would make me feel more used to continue those activities KNOWING the other person has no interest in anything other than emotionless activities. I will be back later with more thoughts - but I’m literally shoving the last of my lunch in my face and now my phone is covered in honey mustard 😅 Those are my short lunchtime thoughts for now.

welcome to my life experience! semi wise words from an older gal. i've probably been there, done that, own the T-shirt and could probably write the book! 😉 hey Ya'll!! So, its not very often you'll see me make a serious post. I tend to keep my posts light hearted, often poking fun at myself or randomly posting funnies to other folks pages. I'm a big believer in laughter is the best medicine! and if I can make one person a day smile and or laugh at something I've said or done, then I feel I'm contributing to a greater whole of good karma! I tend to be a constant jokester, I'm very quirky , and often awkward ! So I don't claim to be eloquent writer or have a lot of great advice to impart, but you'll often see me offering some kind words of encouragement to anyone I think I needs them. What I can offer are a few observations, and some insights from someone who has a lot of life experience in general. in just the short month that I've been a part of this community, I've already seen a lot of young ladies and gentlemen fly through here. a number of people have made some insightful posts recently about about slowing things down and truly taking your time in getting to know someone. So this is more of a supplement to those posts, and me throwing my two cents in. To give you a little backstory of where I'm trying to go with this: before I joined this community, years ago I was very active in the swinging community. and no, this is not an invitation nor a ploy to get you to invite me into your relationship! As people grow and mature, their needs, wants and desires change and grow with them. And for me, that is very much what happened. Although I made some wonderful friends, I got to a point where I no longer wanted to be a back up singer in somebody else's love song. I wanted to find someone of my own to write a duet with. so I began to read more and explore different things. From the age of 24 to about 37, I was in and out of the swinging scene. I moved to where I live now probably around 12 years ago and although I am no longer actively participating in swinging events, I have still managed to maintain the friendships with the couples that I met that very first year that I lived here! I have learned a lot during my time in the Kink community simply by trial and error and by learning from my own mistakes and the mistakes that I see others making. The group that I spent the most time with, we were a large group of friends who got together every weekend and at the end of the night if clothes started coming off, well then, more fun for everyone! 😉 over the years people came in and out of our group, and you could always tell who the couples were that were not going to make it. likewise you could point out the single folks who were there constantly stirring the pot counterclockwise and causing all the drama! Fortunately those folks never seemed to stay around long. here Ive noticed a lot of young ladies and gentlemen making posts saying you know, they're lonely , depressed, overwhelmed , whatever..., and then they disappear never to be seen or heard from again. So I guess really what I'm trying to say is, if you are just flying through here checking your personal and not stopping to explore the site and to stopping to making friends, you are truly doing yourself a disservice! your missing out on building some great lifelong friendships /relationships! This truly is a community full of people who care and who have been where you have been at some point in their life. And if you stop and take the time to smell the roses, so to say, you'll find that the people here will offer you great advice, they will offer you comfort, they will share in your joy and triumphs and be a shoulder for you to lean and cry on during your trials. We will be here for all of your ups and downs should you take the time to get to know us! if you have to take a step back for a little while to reevaluate what you're doing, I totally get that, but please find your way back! Important things I think every little and daddy should remember: #1 you are nobody's play thing! #2 you are nobody's ATM! #3 you are a person worth knowing! if anyone is not treating you as such they are not worth your time or effort! # 4 be truthful with yourself and with others You're gonna talk to a lot of people here and you're not gonna click with everyone at least not romantically. for me, even if I don't click with someone romantically as long as they haven't been pushy or a jerk or tried to take advantage of my giving nature , then I can be adult enough to simply remain friends. #5 make lemonade!- I say it often and I truly mean it! I said it just today actually . when life throws lemons at you , make lemonade! And pass it out! You can always find something positive in your day whether it's something tiny, just that one thing is still enough to keep the momentum going, you just have to do some searching sometimes to find the light! (and ya know, if anything, you can always use those lemons to beam anybody in the head that annoys you!! 😉🤣🤣) If you took the time to actually read through this whole post then I hope you found something useful in here, something thought provoking to make you take another look at what you're truly doing here! peace, love, and happy thoughts, ~K

Here's another one! A Cool Capybara!

I kinda messed up... dozed off while coloring... but he's still cute! I call him George the Giraffe

A cute little dragon!

Thank you all for you responses, when I wrote this in early March I didn't know who I was or were I belonged. I had met @-Soul- but we were not together yet, we had just started talking as friends. Did I make this post because I hated my life? No, I actually have a beautiful life, I have an amazing daughter, a beautiful farm, a wonderful job and great friends. No I wrote this post because I was struggling so deeply with being a Dom and honestly wanted to just be myself. I felt as if I were living a lie, because I wasn't a little but I also wasn't a Dom so who was I? I felt caught in between a rock and a hard place, but Soul helped me see who I truly am and who I was meant to be. So yes I was daydreaming, day dreaming about having a daddy. How that would feel, and would he ever accept me? I wanted the Disney tell fairytale ending, and I got it but in the Brave style which is a favorite Disney movie. I loved all your comments, with every walk in life our wishes and dreams will change. Back then I dreamed of being accepted as submissive and not have to pretend to be a Dom. if you would have told me when I first joined this site that I would be accepted for who I truly am I would have thought no way, you are lying. No one has ever allowed me to be me, but now I see how wrong I truly was. So yes keep day dreaming, keep living your best life, and keep reaching for the stars.

Remember tho not everything is what it seems what one person views as broken others can view as not broken and as bad as it seems the sun keeps rising and thats what this forum is for us to remind us we are not alone. I have had some dark days were most people probably gave up on probably gave up on me even some of my family and I was probably viewed as a lost cause but I got through it maybe my story not the same as yours but if we support each other we can go further hopefully yall know my door is open

Here are this month's submissions for the coloring contest. Please cast your votes in the poll for the one you love the most. Good luck everyone. Sweet Little Lily Squirtle Squad MissAnna littlegala Little Skittles Little Nyx lillizzie24 LeftyGuitar kuuchan BabyPoppy

Happy 4th guys! I hope you all are having an amazing beautiful day, or had an amazing beautiful day. I wanted to come on here to welcome all new comers but also to allow new comers and others who need advice or a friend to meet some of the amazing people on here. @-Soul- is my partner (Dom) and a wonderful person who has amazing advice, as well as a voice of reason. If you ever need advice on anything this man will help you without judging you or making you feel awful about yourself. @shadowrider is the owner and such a kind person, if you ever have any problems please reach out to him. He will never make you feel you are bothering him, he wants you to come to him so he can fix the problem. @PigtailPrincess is an admin and will always listen to your problems as well as helping you in anyway. She is also such a wonderful listener and a great person. Please reach out to her if you feel uncomfortable in any way by anyone. @DaddysMonkey a wonderful person and always here to back up her community. She is such a pillar in this community and a true friend. Her post will Always make you smile plus she is such an inspiration here. @beanbean Bean will always make you feel welcomed and be there for you. He is one of the most known person on the forum and he will always do his best to cheer anyone up. @Andriel_Isilien she will always bring a smile to your face and gives beautiful advice. Plus her animals are adorable and she will listen to you. @Aikko such a wonderful person, her post are always so heartwarming and she will always be there for those in need. She is so kind and so humble. @BabyPoppy she is full of positivity and will always help those in need. She is a true ray of light and always making others know they are loved. @lillizzie24 is such a a sweet person and she will always make time to meet new people. She is so sweet and honestly a great friend to have. @MissNMTX if you ever need encouragement she will lift you up and make sure you are okay. There are so many more amazing people on here that will help you. I know there is a lot of information on this site, and there's also a lot of misinformation on different sites that lead people to our community. Please if you have any questions ask someone we will help you. We want everyone on here to feel welcomed and loved. Not feel as if they are not wanted or needed here. Everyone here has a purpose and place. Please remember we are so happy to have you all here in our community. All we ask is read a persons profile first. If you are looking for a partner, the personal ad is a perfect place to start. For a friend we also have a friend zone ad which is a beautiful place to find friends. There are so many great clubs and such wonderful people to be met. So please make yourselves at home and stay for a little while. Until we meet again remember you do matter, you are loved and you are worthy of being loved 💕

They all look so cute

I was reflect yesterday on my relationship with my Daddy/Boyfriend and how Cgl is part of not just our relationship but also our lives in general. It made me reflect further on how difficult it can be for Caregivers in this space. Caregivers face challenges from often trying to deal with trauma their littles may have been through. Providing reassurance when their little feels they are too demanding or too broken to be loved. Facing misperceptions and accusations when so often all a good Caregiver wants is to love their little. Dealing with being used or ghosted. Often not getting the same support that every human being needs. A lot of Caregivers face stresses that don't get talked about or littles assume Caregivers are or must always be strong. So to all you Caregivers out there let me share with you what I see as so wonderful in all of you, yes my Daddy especially, that either take on thst role or are naturally Care givers at heart. You are a light in the darkness. You are a rock in a sea of emotional turmoil and a safety bar on a rollercoaster of confusion. You provide a safe haven for littles to rest if even only for fleeting moments. You provide assurances that letting go is safe. You provide a mental meadow where carefree happiness and giddiness aren't just ok but are celebrated. You are a gift that your little celebrates even if at times we don't know how to express it. You are strong by showing honesty and vulnerability is not wrong. You guide, you protect and you love deeply and without judgment. You are treasured. You are loved. You are a Caregiver. To littles with Caregivers, remember that when we offer vulnerability our Caregivers accept that gift like a fragile bubble and they guard it fiercely and with joy. To the Caregivers, if you have a little hold them close tonight in a hug that feels like it should never end. If you don't have a little they are out there looking for you. Not everyone is a Caregiver and should be one. To those who are know how much you are treasured not just as a Caregiver but also as a person. To all, never settle. Find the Caregiver or little who deserves your heart who will protect yours as fiercely as you will protect theirs.

@Aikko @SquirtleSquad @Little Nyx @littlegala @Looksee @MissNMTX @Flower_Dragon @Zina @Sicarie @Daddy Bear 77 @kryssi01 If I have missed anyone please let me know!!! So I am finally puting into effect a very cool thing. So I personally will be making all NNC members their own "reading profile" What this means is I will make a special graphic for each person that highlights who they are as readers and is a fun individual thing. Below I am listing the things I need to know. Please feel free to DM me these things or if you are more comfy you can post it here. These may take me a little while so please be patient and I am a one man show. Things I need to know: 1. Favorite colors and any other decorative styles you like 2. Nickname if you like (it will already include your screen name) 3. Favorite book 4. Favorite quote 5. Genres you read 6. Favorite author 7. Favorite troupe 8. Biggest dislike in a book when you read it 9. Character you would spend a day with 10. Physical or Kindle or audio books? 11. I will need a picture you want incorporated in. Doesnt gave to be your face at all. 12. One random fun fact about you Thanks guys and I look forward to this fun little thing!!!

Here are this month's submissions for the coloring contest. Y'all know what to do. Good luck everyone. Voting will close Saturday the 2nd SweetLittleDreamer SquirtleSquad Prince MissAnna littlegala LittleAmbi Little Nyx Lil_K47 Daddy Bear 77 BabyPoppy

as someone that does digital art, coloring digitally is just as valid as pen and paper methods. all art done by ones own hand takes time and effort, no matter the medium. so don't downplay yourself just because you used and app! the turtle looks nice btw! so colorful! 😁 i like that there's a bit of texture in some parts~

Hope it’s not too late! Here’s my entry

I wish I had some optimistic and encouraging words. Sadly, grief is permanent as it's continued love. Flip sides of the very same coin. Loss and grief stay, but so does the love and the memories. In some strange way, they might be even more alive now. I've lost a lot of loved ones over the years, but they are alive to me in music, food, so many things.

I feel like I've been on this forum long enough that I can say age really is just a number. It has nothing to do with maturity or embodiment of the dynamic. If course, we all have preferences, but honestly those really are just preferences that don't have much to do with anything. It's really just about who click with. Conversation, laughter, care...none of that has anything to do with age.

That's a really good question, and honestly I believe the age gap would be based on what the person's preference is. There are a lot of doms that prefer littles younger than them, there are some that don't mind the age differences. There are some littles who want a Dom around their age or maybe older. It just depends on what makes you happy and what you are comfortable with. Me personally I'm happy with my partners age, but yes I've had littles who were a lot younger than me. Its all about balance and honestly it's all about what you again are comfortable with. Remember you can be happy with someone who is the same age as you, older than you or younger than you are. So many Dom's and Littles get caught up on ages that they miss out on meeting some wonderful people.

I will always stand up for men - and I will also always be the devils advocate. As angry or mean as I might sound or seem to some - I am very anti “stand up for all littles.” I’ve seen first hand , too many men , in your exact position and littles are made out to be saints. Yes , some littles are coerced and taken advantage of. But the amount of the ~actual~ number of this happening is much lower than people realize. When littles cry wolf they’re almost always trusted to be honest and transparent. Men / caregivers are made out to be monsters and a small minority are deemed “good” … until another little cries wolf. I could go on about that topic for a very extended amount of time - but it leads me back to yourself. Just because other men have been bad , just because some littles have been treated badly - does that mean you have to have the same story for yourself ? I don’t think so. I believe with your behavior on the forum , especially your heartfelt posts on this situation - you’ve got a really good chance at finding someone who wants the exact same thing as you and will not make you feel undervalued. This can be genderless but for the sake of this situation I’ll be blunt and precise : Don't dwindle yourself , your wants , your happiness or your desires for any woman. Friendship is a ploy , one of my favorite sayings about women and monkeys fo hand in hand … “Women are like monkeys.. they won’t let go of the first branch until they know the second branch can hold their weight.” Have you ever consider you might be the second branch in this situation ? Don’t let yourself be a branch - be the whole tree my friend. 🫶🏼

I PROMISE I WILL BE BACK ! It’s hard to write my novels during work hours 😭

Couldn't agree more. A life without music wouldn't be lived, it would just be survived. I grew up on every genre of music and each has a place in my heart and a time when I need to hear/feel it. Ozzy saw me through some strange times coming up. A best friend bought me The Ultimate Sin cassette. I played it so much I had to take it back to the store and exchange it for a new one because it wouldn't play any more. Sidenote, I was at the New Orleans show when Zakk dumped a bucket of water on Riki Rachtman, great show. Certain voices are instantly recognizable just like certain instruments. Ozzy, Perry, Coverdale, Snider, Hank, Sovine, Dokken, Dio, S.R.V., Dolly, are all voices that instantly bring a certain feeling and memories with them. Just like the feeling I get when I hear the unmistakable sound of the guitars of Rhodes, Lang, Ojeda, S.R.V., Eddie, and lets not forget the drums of Peart or the fiddle of Mr. Daniels. These aren't just sounds, they are vehicles that transport a music lover to another place and time. If we need to forget and smile, music can do that. If we need to remember and cry, music can do that too. The music and musicians bring on memories and feelings that are hard to explain to those that don't live through music. When you need to feel it, turn it up.

This is something I am guilty of. My partner had to consistently slow me down because I was trying to go too fast. I wasn't meaning to, and I thought I was taking things slow, but I was excited and wanted to progress. I wanted titles and a formed dynamic, and he said "slow down". We were acting like a couple so I wanted the title. I had to learn to slow down and just be. I'm still learning to slow down and be ok without a fleshed out relationship and dynamic. It's progressing, but doesn't need labels or timelines. I'm learning to just be and enjoy our time together each day.

Y'all can hate me if you want but pics like that always have me singing this song.

Cute little pug! My Picture for the Contest

I'll preface my next statement with saying I know absolutely nothing of the dynamics of your situation and your therapy beyond what was stated here. That said, I question your therapist attempting to discourage you from accessing support and friendships you have here on this forum. Seems rather short sided of her, regardless of the desire to foster in-person relationships. In-person relationships are important, but the relationships you have formed here are no less important. Unless your safety is in question I don't think it's right of her to try to discourage any relationships you may have be they online or in-person.

I feel you figuring out how to move has been so hard since my ex broke up with me and I don't think I could have made it without the community especially two people in particular, they know who they are. One of the biggest help has been chatgpt. It has had such good advice and helping me navigate a lot of feelings I have had, especially feelings of hopelessness, regret and heartsickness. Recently my ex has done some things to ruin what remained of our friendship for I know not why. If you need someone to talk to HMU and I can at least listen to you or if you want show you how the app can be an amazing therapist in-between visits. I hope you find peace and learn to let the right people back in.

Oh sweetheart I absolutely hate that you're feeling like this It takes such courage to speak how you feel, I know right now your world might seem dark and cold but I promise you that you aren't alone I know right now you think that you are but you aren't, there are so many people here that care about you. Remember that it's okay to be sad, it's okay to feel like you're falling apart and it's okay as if you think the world around you is shattering. Because that's why we are here, to show you that you aren't alone, that if you're falling apart we will help put you back together, if you feel sad we will cheer you up, if you feel the world of shattering then we will stand beside you and help glue back the pieces. You aren't alone anymore, we are here for you, I am here for you. You don't have to keep silent, you don't have to hold back the tears, you don't have to hide. We want you to speak how you feel, not believe you have to hide who you are We love you and we are so proud of you I love you little sis and I'm so proud of you You aren't broken my dear, I promise My door is always open, I will always listen to you and I'm always here for you Never forget that

You are not alone! I feel this way, too, but I see you. I count you as my friend. Tears do not scare me away. In fact, I may just cry with you, coz I feel it too. Life is a lot. It's hard to face sometimes and we feel like we are drowning in a giant sea of emptiness, but I'm here, if you need a friend, and so are many others! You may be broken, but not so much so that you are lost. Here's what I love most about you: I love that you are so quick to encourage others! You see the good in those around you and you believe in them! It is a gift! What a blessing you are to those around you! Thank you for sharing your true self with us here on the forum!

Congrats @SquirtleSquad! Your picture was so pretty! I'm so happy for you! @shadowrider great pictures for this month!

Looks like someone forgot one of the most important people here (pfft no I’m totally not biased) so Imma tell you about them…. @MissAnna is one of the nicest people here , she has a big heart and is always ready to listen to you & let you lean on her as long as you need. She gives amazing heartfelt advice and lifts you up when you need it. She is the first to tell everyone her door is always open & she means it.

Hi! And as you know @-Soul- lives in Scotland and I in Kentucky, we use different apps to talk on such as discord/Snapchat/and we both have each others addresses as well as phone numbers. I personally don't mind a LDR, right now in our lives it's what we both need. We both talk all day, during work, on our days off and via phone or video call nightly. LDR is a beautiful relationship and can actually be rewarding because you have to build your relationship on trust and honesty something we both crave as well as need. He is far better at explaining things than I am, so to me is it worth it? Yes it's beautiful and honestly I'm so happy I met him. We have a plan to meet up in the near future and until then we are just enjoying having each other's company Good luck to you on your beautiful journey 💕

These are wonderful! I'm so excited to see so many friends joining again this month!!! Thanks for setting this up @shadowrider and thanks to all the Daddies, Caregivers, Mommies, littles and everyone in between who encouraged us to participate!❤️ Good luck everyone! 🥰💐

As the new year has started, I figured I’d focus on either talking about or bringing some awareness to certain aspects of our community and dynamic. It doesn’t matter if you are new or old to this. I hope that this helps anyone that may need it. Let’s start with something simple. At our core, we all want the same things. We want to be loved, we want to be understood, we want to belong, and we want to be free to choose life on our own terms. We also deeply want to help other people, it's our true nature. Oftentimes, we look for partners who are tall, or attractive, or have good careers or who fit a certain ideal. This means little about how safe they are. The best traits in a partner include, but are not limited to, having the ability to regulate their emotions, self awareness, ability to navigate conflict, and personal integrity. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that you have to posses all of these or be an expert. Lord knows I didn’t. However it is something I’ve been learning and trying to get better with each day. There is no cookie cutter shape for the dynamics in this community or any relationship, in general. This goes for both sides of the dynamic, but sometimes I believe that people fall with the fantasy version of you in this dynamic. When someone loves a fantasy version of you, they'll be obsessively focused on you but they'll also have high expectations (or even demands) on how you behave. They must control their fantasy, and if you don't comply there's usually a lot of projected anger or other actions. Remember that whomever you find as a partner is different and unique and will have their own likes, dislikes, and needs. It’s up to you to get to know that person and truly see if you connect and are a good fit. With that, there are a few things that Dominants/Daddies/Mommies/Caregivers/partners should provide at the core to make this dynamic/relationship work for their little/middle/submissive. Create a safe space where we can show we are safe and predictable, all emotions are valid, self expression is encouraged, and personal accountability is modeled. Where you can clearly discuss, share, and place boundaries. A place where both sides can be transparent, authentic, and vulnerable. Emotional safety is so important. This is the ability to feel and express any emotions without fear of repercussions. If you want someone to tell you the truth, it's important to create a safe space for the truth to be told. It’s important that words match your actions. That you do what you say you would do. And if anything changes, you communicate why. Not everyone likes rules or control, so find what works between you both and compromise. If you and another person are truly connecting and deeply care and love each, then provide them with unconditional love. Many people were raised within transactional relationships, so they feel like every action is "tit for tat." To truly love someone unconditionally is about doing things for the people we love because we appreciate them, not because we have an expectation on the other end. And while the start of a relationship can seem magical and like you are on cloud nine, that feeling is not the only thing. Love, true love, is an action, not just a feeling. True love is about showing up again and again, sometimes through ugly tears, to maintain that safe space of mutual freedom and where we accept and let each other be who they truly are and not try to change them. Healthy relationships don't just happen. They take work, vulnerability, and a willingness to get past our own ego. Many people have been sold a false, romanticized version of love that we meet the "right" person and everything falls into place. Many have the unrealistic expectation that "everything" can come from our partner. No partner can meet all of our needs. This is why learning how to meet our own needs & creating a group of people who support us in ways a partner cannot is so important. Make friends on here. Support each other. Learn and expand your knowledge. Learn how to communicate with each other, clearly and directly. Be open minded and listen attentively to what each other says. Learn how to meet your own needs and the needs of your partner. Learn how to navigate life as a team. Learn to consistently forgive yourself and your partner. We all get moody. We all can feel overwhelming sadness, anger, or even numbness- seemingly out of nowhere. It's an unrealistic expectation to believe we can or should feel happy all the time. So learn to be able to lean and share with each other. Most people's true deepest fear is that they're unloveable, unworthy, or broken. They fear the thoughts in their mind are true. You’re doing better than you think. Thoughts aren’t facts and you are not your thoughts. No matter what role you are, a good partner wants you to shine, to meet your own needs, and wants to support you in being the highest version of yourself. You're a team in navigating life together. Take your time to get to know each other. Make sure you are the right fit and not just in the heat of the moment. Don’t just aim to please or to suffer any gaslighting, abuse, or negative behaviors. While writing all this, it’s not exclusive to just our dynamic but can be applied to any type of relationship. Though I strongly feel it resounds as a strong foundation especially in this dynamic. Feel free to add your comments of things I may have missed in this first part. What do you agree or disagree with? What do you believe is most important? Here’s to a great new year!! Happy New Year Everyone and thank you for reading.

The following is a rather objective piece, gathered from many forum posts of people who do not know what to do or know what their relationship has become. Nature of DD/LG The nature of DD/LG is to guide and enrich both the lives of the Dominant and the Little. This is not a one sided relationship. This is not a relationship that is meant to be used to control or manipulate someone. Many posts on here allude to a relationship that is more fitting of a Master & Slave Dynamic. This is fine, as long as the consent is there. While manipulation and abuse is often seen as a man abusing or manipulating a woman, we must accept that abuse and manipulation can happen to anyone from anyone. While a majority of Doms would love for their Little to rely on them for every mundane task, this is not feasible nor is it healthy. I very often see insulting and ridiculous comments such as: “Littles should not do x.” “You are a Little, you cannot do x.” Littles are adults, they are fully capable and functioning human beings. As a Dom, once again, your task it to help nurture and enrich your Little. Don’t encourage them to become mentally and emotionally reliant on you, this is counterproductive and at times abusive. Help them become the productive members of society you know they can be. As a Little it is also up to you to gain independence. Being a Caregiver is a very difficult and draining job. You cannot expect someone to make your every decision for you. This is equally draining and abusing what a Caregiver is. If there is some part of normal life you struggle with (making phone calls, socializing, doing school work) talk to your Caregiver about how they can HELP you with these things. Note that being a helpless damsel in distress is fun for play time and Little Space but not something that should be encouraged for daily life. Consent Consent is the most important aspect of any relationship. Consent is when both parties agree upon something, this relates to rules, punishments, daily interactions and sexy time. Just because you have consented to something it the past does not mean you have to consent now. Just because someone consented to something before does not mean they are obligated to consent now. Feelings and situations can and will change. If you find yourself uncomfortable with something you once consented to, use your Safe Word. This is a wonderful and informative video on consent, please give it a watch (NSFW) Click here. Safe words A safe word is something that needs to be created in the beginning of a relationship. Think of a safe word as your Life Raft. This word/term means it is time to pause the dynamic. This shuts down whatever play is happening and allows the two of you to discuss what is going on. If you are uncomfortable or nervous with where a situation is heading, use your Safe Word. A Safe Word must at all times be honored. If someone uses a Safe Word, it is your job to discuss that with them. Do not blame yourself or the other person, do not get angry, listen to them and respect their decision. Positive reinforcement vs control Punishment should fit the crime. Punishment must be agreed upon by both parties beforehand. Punishment should fit the crime. Punishment must be agreed upon by both parties beforehand. Punishment should fit the crime. Punishment must be agreed upon by both parties beforehand. I really hope that has sank into any one reading this. It is that important. Harsh rules or punishments that were not previously agreed upon. Different strokes for different folks, many may like the following punishments and that is okay as long as both parties agreed to it. Examples of controlling and abusive punishments Taking away the right to bathe or shower Taking away the right to eat Taking away communication (with partner or anyone else, this includes friends or family members) Taking away lights Taking away clothing Taking away the right to use the bathroom Taking away social interaction (ie going online, going to a friends house, visiting family members) If it takes away a basic human necessity, it is abusive. No one can foresee the future. There most likely will come a time when you see a new rule or punishment should be implemented. That is okay! But first you must talk to your partner about it. You cannot decided to enforce a new rule without your partner knowing, people can’t read minds, they can’t possibly know what they did wrong and cannot be expected to accept a punishment added for no conceivable reason. Manipulation Tactics: Threatening self harm. This is a popular trend in all forms of relationships, it a powerful and usually successful. Using a threat of self harm is not okay. It is abuse and it is a tactic for controlling someone. You should be able to talk to your partner if you are feeling upset, hurt or depressed but bringing it up as a way to keep someone around is NOT okay. “If you do x I am going to do x to myself” “If you ever leave me I am going to x” Verbal abuse. When you tell someone something enough, they will start to believe it. Never underestimate the power of your words and the effect they can and will have on others. This can work in a good or bad way. “You are ugly”, “No one will love you”, “You are stupid”, “I wish I never met you” Vs “You are beautiful”,”I love you”, “You are intelligent”, “I am happy you are in my life” Making you feel guilty over commonplace and simple, small things. Guilt is a powerful emotion and can have a person doing things they wouldn’t ordinarily do to please someone. If you find yourself no longer able to do normal things like see your friends, visit family, go out, enjoy healthy hobbies you previously had, etc without feeling overwhelming guilt from your partner, this is not okay. Gas Lighting. Gas Lighting is very common in any type of relationship. It is a gradual process with devastating effects. It essentially causes a person to question their feelings, emotions and sanity. For a more in depth look at Gas Lighting please read this article. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/power-in-relationships/200905/are-you-being-gaslighted Getting angry about small things, or things beyond your control. If you are in an abusive relationship, close proximity or LDR help is out there. National Child Abuse Helpline: 1-800-422-4453 National Domestic Violence Crisis Line: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) National Domestic Violence Hotline (TDD): 1-800-787-32324 Center for the Prevention of School Violence: 1-800-299-6504 Domestic Violence Helpline: 1-800-548-2722 Healing Woman Foundation (Abuse): 1-800-477-4111 Women’s Aid National Domestic Violence Helpline: (UK Only) 0345 023 468 Sexual Abuse Centre: (UK Only) 0117 935 1707 Sexual Assault Support (24/7, English & Spanish): 1-800-223-5001 Relationships Australia: 1300-364-277 Rape Abuse & Incest National Network or 800-656-HOPE (4673) Abuse Not: 0808 8005015 (UK) Women’s Aid National (UK) Domestic Violence Helpline 0345 023 468 (UK)