Please I need help with my daddy!!

[Guest Princessbubblegum]

Hello, I'm really new here and fairly new to ddlg but I didn't know where else to go for advice so I made an account!

 

My boyfriend and I are in a ddlg relationship, but it's really soft and casual. He is mostly (only) into it in a sexual way and that's where our problem is. I'm not really into age play (pacifiers and such), but I wish he would give me rules and take care of me, but everytime we talk about it we sort of end up "fighting" and he says he doesn't want to do that 24/7 (Which I don't either!). I think he is also confused about what he wants, he read up on it and said that he does caregiving stuff without noticing it but we just won't go further than that in the conversation.

 

I really love him and he loves me and I don't want this hindering our relationship! But at the same time I feel so frustrated and sad and I feel like a weirdo everytime I bring it up, because I feel like I'm more into it than him (know what I mean?)

 

I don't know what to do! I wish it didn't bother me as much so we could just do it casually but I can't seem to shake it off and I don't want to force him to do something he doesn't want to do either.

 

Anyway I really hope someone here may understand and help me out a bit, because I'm really lost

 

Thank you very much!

[DaddySweetDaddy]

Well, all I can say is a lot of younger daddies just do not have the emotional maturity to be what you most really need and want.  Its amazing if an older daddy does in this world for that matter, but its more likely. 

[Hot loving dom]

Daddysweetdaddy, you read my mind. They don't realise what a person needs as they haven't experienced life.

 

Princess bubblegum. I've encountered this many times when I used to be a trainer etc. He's doing it because it's kinky and a bit of fun. He seems not to understand the true meaning of it or what you need. You could have him coached?

[Guest chilldude]

If you're not into regressing (what you called ageplay, which by the way is something different), then perhaps you should tell him what you are into - in detail. Saying you want rules and to be cared for is rather vague. Perhaps you're more submissive than little, or a middle. However irrespective of what you are, he does need to understand that like the comments above have said, it's not just all about sex. 

If you're 24, I suspect he's at least that age. Age is no excuse. You just need a mature mind, not an adolescent one. 

[Guest SUeB]

Just sounds like you are simply incompatible. You can't force him to give you what you want, or even make him understand it.

[DavCentral]

You can't force him to give you what you want, that's true.. but you can introduce it to him in a manner he can understand and enjoy, and let him decide if he wants it.

 

I suggest you both sit and write out what you would like from each other, and your relationship.

 

Things like him not being caregiver 24/7, you say want the same.. From personal experience in the same shoes, I can say that is something you definitely need to clarify and talk talk talk about. Like when does it stop? Or, when do you need, what he feels he already does?

 

Has your boyfriend been a Daddy before?

I'm gonna guess no, and throw this out there that he might very much enjoy your company as a big girl in general, and because you are having a 'vanilla' relationship too (and most people are much more familiar with this), that is what he understands better, without having additional stresses of being caregiver. I wouldn't say he doesn't want to be a Daddy, but he needs more information about what you want and require from him, and when.

 

Like any relationship, you need to be understanding of what you need and what your partner can provide, at any given time. We all have to ebb and flow with our partners as it is teamwork not a selfish battle.

[Leo_Ascendent]

I'm gonna disagree with the first two posts age is hardly a test of maturity (look at the political world), experience is, and again, age doesn't equate to that.

 

OP, SUeB is correct, can't force someone to like something or act a certain way.