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Rewards and Punishments!~funishments, ideas, charts, etc.


Guest taryn of arendelle

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Hello! Skype is a wonderful tool. I often like to make play areas with stuffies and several activities I enjoy. Even if he's busy gaming with friends, I can still be in a call with him and we can watch each other interact with our environment. Online shopping together for cute outfits, etc is really fun! Roleplay is a pretty common aspect of long distance rewards/punishments. Also, there's some pretty NSFW punishments that be dealt with on Skype along with long-distance "toys" that can be paired together through wifi depending on how long distance you are.

 

Edit: I also think mailing a diary back and forth is a great way to become close or to make care packages once in a blue moon. 

Edited by Strawberry Sprinkles
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Guest cookie_crumble_princess

You could send him a card that sings or talks with the goggly eyes if he likes those sorta things! They're only at most three dollars and a stamp to mail. You could teach him how to make cool crafts!

 

I love crafts, vinegar baking soda explosions. how to make putty, go on pinterest for crafts - don't narrow it for boys or girls. most crafts are unisex.

 

Teach him to make an air plane or sail boat. OR make one for him out of nice paper. and mail it to him, so he can pop it up for an instant toy. These are also only an envelope and a stamp. 

 

If he has money to purchase his own toys, but needs to save money for it  a good idea is to clip a coupon for that item and gift him with the coupon. So, he's one step closer to getting his reward. 

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Guest cookie_crumble_princess

heee, my friend says boys like sex. Sooo, maybe send him a pair of your undies. Thongs would be much cheaper to send ;) . Only cost an envelope, 1 or 2 stamps and a ziplock bag with a spritz of perfume or lotion you like. This is a bit strange, but clever enough...you can write a message on the inside flap of the envelope instead of sending an actual piece of paper. 

 

Oh on the flap he will have to open it carefully. It will build anticipation for his reward. 

Edited by cookie_crumble_princess
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Reward wise we have a "time bank". Now I have a lot in the time bank cause daddy went on a trip last year and a big work thing. I netted 48 hours in that two weeks. Anyway the time I can "withdraw" for various things like extra time up, movie time when I'm meant to be doing stuff etc. And by doing stuff I mean chores. Who doesn't like movies or skylanders over chores. I don't have many besides keeping my room reasonable anyway. He could send colouring books and pencils, you could draw him and colour him pictures. We use kik to keep talking through out the day. Ooooh what about watching a movie together at the same time. We sometimes do that with episodes of once upon a time.
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You said you like books on your profile. What about a book written by you, you could even email it, with him as the hero. All it would take is an hour or so of your time and to email it. You can adjust what happens in the story depending on his little age.
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My little and i are LDR,and have a "gold star" program. Basically, she can earn gold stars, which i put on her rules list, for good behavior. Or have stars deducted for naughty behavior.

 

Some days ill give her a gold star challenge where if she does something good she can earn a new star. She can also use one to get out of trouble, or punishes, or to veto a rule, or stuff like that.

 

Typically i make them difficult to earn, because they are pretty powerful and valueable, but they are a fun little game that we play, and give her great incentive to accomplish her achievments that i set for her.

 

My little loves sweets, but healthy eating is important to me, so a gold star challenge may be to eat a serving of fresh veggies, on a day when she would rather just eat chocolate. It can work really well, and can be fun for us.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Give him routines to follow through out the day so he can feel obedient

Help him get dressed on skype! Pick out his outfits for him!

Bed time stories before bed are always fun.

Ask how his day was and make sure hes eating enough and healthy.

Mail him love letters with your perfume on it and lipstick marks.

<3  

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  • 3 months later...

Hi all,

 

I have a long distance DDLG relationship - 6 months tomorrow - whoooohooo!!!!

 

We have a structured set of rules which she does an amazing job of sticking to most of the time, I'm very proud of her! But I struggle with knowing how to reward her for her brilliance, because of the distance and the lack of time we have together. We both have extremely busy lives at the moment - particularly her and we can't spend an awful lot of time together.

 

To help look after her chores we use an App called Choremaster which is really good, in that you earn points and then you can set up rewards of differing values.

 

I'm just struggling to come up with Rewards that we can actually do so any ideas from others in LDR's would be appreciated greatly

 

Many thanks

K

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Some rewards i have used are, draw or make a coupon for one day with no rules. You could allow extra sweets as a reward. You could give her a google play, itunes or amazon card as a reward. Or you could read her an extra special bedtime story, such as this one, my most recent favorite.

 

http://storyberries.com/the-nightingale-and-the-rose/

 

My personal favorite reward i ever did though was to shower together. We set our phones up in the shower, yknow, nothing dirty, just from the chest up, and video chatted while showering. Didnt take long and as long as you have somewhere to put your phone so its not getting too wet, it should be fine.

 

 

Hope those help.

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You could get her to set up an Amazon wishlist if you're looking for materialistic ideas, get her to reach a certain goal of 'points' and you could buy her something that's on there, maybe not tell her what it is either so she'll be surprised! 

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Guest Princessaj

When I have done my chores I need a manicure and pedicure.

Gift certificates are available at nail salons. If she doesn't have

a regular girl you can look on yelp for one near her house.

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Yeah there are some good ideas there, I did actually set up an Amazon account just for us and put some credit on there for her birthday. Because of our situation, hers particularly, she has to arrange ordering and delivery but I am able to choose the gift for her. So it works just fine.

 

K

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My little boy and me were long distance for awhile so we have a few things we always did.

 

1.) So the first and foremost was Netflix and chill. So basically we used Skype on our laptops and did a video call and once in a video call you can screen-share (it also shares audio and keeps a small box of the persons face up the whole time so long as you haven't turned that off in the settings). With this set up I pulled up Netflix and we watched his favorite shows to reward him when he did really good and as he did better I let him watch more or a movie and if he did super good I would tell him to go get/buy some snacks or sweets so that he can be in little space.

 

2.) The other thing we did was he screen-shared with me and he played online games while I watched and talked with him about it as he played. 

 

3.) The last one we did was (still with the screen-share) he pulled up any YouTube videos he wanted watch and he would play them for me. I know it sounds like its the same as the tv/movie thing but this is different because honestly a lot of people don't realize jut how fun it is to watch YouTube videos so like we watch all kinds (my little is Hispanic so don't think I am being insensitive here or anything). His favorite to show me was "you know your Mexican when...(part 1-7?) It was so much fun he also loves showing me cute little pet videos and claiming the ones we would have in the future. 

 

Honestly, I think a lot of mommies/daddies/caregivers over thing the idea of rewards. Littles just want our full undivided attention so that's what you should give them to reward them best! I know as a caregiver you have a lot on your plate but if you really want to reward them you can do almost anything just give them the undivided attention they so crave. So be creative do anything you think she will like and just give her the attention and it will be the best reward she has ever gotten! 

 

Good luck and if you need any more help/advice I am more than willing!

-TheQueen

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  • 4 weeks later...

A lot of the ideas here are great, but focuses heavily on things. Consider a bigger reward to be a day just to her. She decides what activities you do together, whether it's neopets(yes it's still a thing) or watching movies together (there are websites that allows you to play urls for both of you at the same time), but make sure you emphasise that this is a treat and all about her.

 

If she has any wishes for a costume or silly little thing she likes that you say, do, or wear, swallow that Daddy pride and do whatever goofy thing it is that maybe even makes you die a little inside (but secretly makes you happy because it's for your little). If your little loves your butt, get up on your chair and shake it! You'll feel embarrassed, and maybe that's what your little wants, is a brief moment of removing the seriousness of the DDlg roles.

 

Write your little an actual letter as a reward. Take pen and paper, excuse your awful handwriting and make your little something only you could, a personalized handwritten letter. It could be something as serious and personal as why you love her, or a silly story that you shared a while ago that made your little happy. As long as it's writen to make your little happy, it'll do its job. Emphasise that it's about, and for, your little!

 

Rewards are my favorite! If you by any chance liked any of my suggestions, I'm more than happy to make more if requested. Add me to friends and send me a pm with something your little likes and I'm sure I'll come up with a million more.

 

People really don't realise how they themselves could be the biggest reward a Daddy or a little could ever receive.

Edited by Nordy
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People really don't realise how they themselves could be the biggest reward a Daddy or a little could ever receive.

 

This is very true and something that we should all remember. (I also adore the letter idea though!)

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Guest Daddy's☆treasure

Hi there! First of all, congrats on the six month mark!

 

My Daddy and i are in a LDR, too. i'm not sure if this is helpful to you, but here is the list of fun (as in clean - i also have sexual rewards) that Daddy has for me.

 

Fun Rewards:

1. Movie night - may watch a movie of choosing with Daddy.
2. Game night - may play a game of choosing with Daddy (online).
3. New stickers - one sheet per reward.
4. One dessert or four pieces of candy. (i am not allowed sweets without permission)
5. Colouring time - one hour.
6. Hot Chocolate time with Daddy.
7. Watch/listen/share music and or music videos together with Daddy.
8. Massage - 10 minutes.
9. Cocktail hour - allowed two late night alcoholic drinks of choice.
10. Bedtime story of choosing read by Daddy.
11. IMVU time together - one hour. (we use a virtual chat sometimes)
12. Spiritual/Magic Practice with Daddy - one hour (we are both Pagan)

 

Hope some of this was useful and can give you some ideas for you to use with your little.

 

All the best! :)

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Guest Docotaco

I may state I am a Little Prince/Middle Prince, but I do have my own rewards. I am a "Daddy" to a friend. They need constant care and reassurance and has called me Daddy on many occasions, especially if they need help or attention. So, I've constructed some rewards for them if they decide they need it, or if I get my own Little some day.

- - -

 

1. As the Queen said, make some time/room, open up Skype turn on Share Screen, fix the settings if need be, and watch some videos/movies/shows together. The best reward for a Little is undivided attention from their Daddy/Dom.

 

2. Pictures. As a Reward, sending a picture of yourself, whether it be sexual or not, is a good reward. This wouldn't be an everyday/everybody reward because some Littles aren't sexual and some Littles might find it off putting to get constant pictures of Daddy for every reward. You should take this as you will, some Littles are all over this, as they treat their Daddy as a celeb.

 

3. Nordy's Physical letter idea is one I've had for a reward since I read about DD/L rewards. Physical letters are "old school". They take time to write and to get to where they need to be. Which is great! You made time and put effort into doing something physical for your Little even tho you're not together physically. It's a sweet idea. Write a love letter, a short story, a poem or just how proud you were/are. There's so much you can put in a letter. Mail a stick of gum or a small candy with it, spray your perfume/colon on it. Make it personal to your Little. (Don't do this often. Your Little will cherish it more if you only send 3 - 5 a year.)

 

4. This idea has been in my head for a long while. It's not just a DD/L idea I've had, but an idea I've had for LDR in general, but this is the DD/L "style".

Send a Rewards Box, every month. They don't have to be expensive goodies, so this can be done on any salary. Some boxes will be bigger others smaller. It's a surprise and keeps your Little on their toes.

There are 2 ways you can figure out how to distribute and measure what goodies your Little can get that month.

 

1. Get 30 items. Use each item for a day. Put in how many good days worth in the box. (This helps your Little understand the system easier. If they want 30 items in their Rewards Box, they need to be good all 30 days.)

 

2. I take pride in this one because of the more care is taken into account.

You make a list of the rules and routines. Make sure you have them all written or typed down so you can keep track. (Your Little will never need to know how this works. So, no need to explain it to them. It's better that way anyways.)

There are bad days, good days, and neutral days. You need to take into account all of these. Bad days you subtract an item, good days you give an item, and neutral days are whatever you feel like. (Give them an item or not.) You also have to take into account how many rules and routines you have. Usually it's between 5-15 from what I've seen myself.

It is extremely important that you have different items to choose from. Big and Small items. Sweets and Toys. Books and Clothes.

 

To distinguish a neutral day from a good day is when your Little acts on a rule or routine without Daddy needing to ask or remind them. (Taking your meds without Daddy's help. Feeding your animal(s) without Daddy's help. Cleaning your room or doing chores without Daddy's help. Going to Sleep without a fuse.) Going that extra mile to make Daddy happy and proud of his Little taking care of themselves without Daddy's help. It's also what you see fit as a good day, since every relationship is different.

A Neutral day is just a normal day. Daddy reminds and takes care of you. A small fuse at bed time doesn't make it a bad day, it's natural to have a fuse at bed time.

Bad days are whatever you feel is bad.

 

The "math" for this is a little complicated, but it's really what you see fit as a Daddy towards their Little, cause every relationship is different.

I'll be using this example; 30 days; 7 days are good days, 3 are bad and the rest are neutral (20 days). You have 2 rules and 1 routine. (Again this is an example, so the proportions are wildly exaggerated/under-exaggerated.) This example will be fairly easy to go by. Bad days are refusing to listen and do what daddy says. (All couples are different!) 

 

You have a Rewards Box. You put 7 Items aside, because they were good days. Take 3 away. Now you have 4.

Determine the rules they broke and went that extra mile for Daddy.

 

- Little made Daddy mad at bed time, their only routine, on all 3 days, but for 1 of those days Little went an extra mile and took care of both or 1 rule.

You as Daddies should think logically on this. Does this Little deserve a reward for that 1 good deed on a bad day?

I'd say no, because they were still bad, but it's up to you. I personally don't believe good over bad, the moment you are bad the day has been "tainted" and therefore you do not deserve a reward.

 

- Out of the 7 good days, 2 days were very good days because Little did both their rules without help and was ready for the routine without Daddy asking.

Daddies should think logically. What items should your Little get for being extra good? Since they did 3 out of the 3 without you asking.

I'd say a big gift is needed, but if you're Little likes getting a lot of things, put in a few small or medium gifts, instead of 1 big item. (These are just my personal rewards, so you determine yourself, Daddies.)

 

- 1 out of the 7 days, got ready for the routine on their own.

Determine the Rewards, Daddies. What items should your Little get for this 1 act of milestone?

I'd say 1 middle gift or a couple small gifts because routines are hard to do but not as hard as a rule.

 

- The Remaining 2 good days. The Little did 2 of the 3 without help from Daddy to make Daddy proud.

Determine the Rewards, Daddies. (Unless you are going to spoil your Little, never put in more then 1 big gift.)

I personally believe the Little deserves 2 medium gifts, 1 for each day, or a few small gifts for both days.

 

9+ Different items in the box. (You can even go that extra mile and wrap them or leave a note explaining each item. It's up to you as a Daddy.)

 

These are Examples or a guild.

I think if anyone did this, the Little would feel extremely loved and grateful as an Adult that they're Daddy took extra care and put a lot of hard thought on each item they put into the box. No matter how cheap, expensive, big or small each item is/was. It's the though that counts and the time that is put into each thought and item in a Rewards Box.

 

- - -

I know #4 was very long to read and I apologize for that, but these are my Reward Ideas. Sorry if any of them seem childish.

Take care!

 

- Doc

Edited by Docotaco
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So me and my daddy have decided it would be a good idea to have a reward chart to encourage me to be a good girl and when I get a certain amount of stickers I get stuffies or pretty outfits.

 

Does anyone else have a reward chart? Any idea on where to get a good one? What things do you do to get stickers and what rewards are you given?

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Guest lilglitterprincess

You can make the chart yourself on cardboard and maybe glitter,pics of your favorite characters etc

You can choose with your daddy what you can do to get stickers,maybe stuff that are harder for you to do,so that you are motivated

And about the rewards you can choose something that you like maybe a stuffie,or huge bag of candy ^_^

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I really want this!!!!

I've been thinking about this alot and I would like having a whiteboard from IKEA
cause then it can be easily changed with adding new rules to follow, or taking away rules that you later see may not be needed.
new rewards, and you can have the stars or happy faces or whatever you want on magnets which can be easily removed if one have been misbehaving so badly it has to be taken away. And the stars/happy faces should be in a place where only daddy knows or can reach so little one can't be naughty and reward her/himself :p 

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I have one! I put a sticker on each healthy meal, bottle of water, chores & meditation practices. Daddy adds up my points at the end of the week and I have a list of prizes to work towards. :) He is also allowed to punish me though for anything he sees not getting done enough at any time, spearate from my points! It works really well.
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Guest Wholockprincess23

I make my own sticker chart every single week. It has all the things that I need to do daily at the top and then things that need to get done weekly towards the bottom. I put a sticker for each complete thing. If I do everything I was supposed to that day, I get a sticker on my reward chart. Otherwise, I don't. After so many stickers on my reward chart, I can trade them in for what I like to call Loot. Hehe. Either a stuffie, a coloring book, new bath toys, a video game, or just about anything else I could want.

 

If you want any help talking through it and getting it put together you can message me! ^_^

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