Being an Idependent Little/Sub

[Baby_Batz]

Lizzo's got me feeling like i don't need no Daddy!  

 

Ok so I feel like a walking contradiction. A few months ago I broke up with my dom, so now I'm on my own and I'm having a little ( haha) trouble getting back into my headspace and figuring out how to fulfill that submissive need in me. I've been on a bettering and improving myself kick since and I was wondering if anyone else has a system or advice on self discipline, being independent, rewarding or general ways to how i can get to know that little side of myself.  How do you learn to take care and spoil your self the way a caretaker would? 

[Guest mjducky]

self care - if you can, buy some nice creams, soaps, face washes and creams, and even makeup if you wear it. spoil yourself !

 

find comfort being little - you can do little things by yourself and even with other littles, such as watching kid movies, buying and having kids snacks, and having warm milk before bed. 

 

have a routine - set a schedule for yourself every day, as if they were rules set by your caregiver. reward yourself for accomplishing tasks!  

 

hope this helps <3

Edited September 9, 2019 by vanillababy ❤

[Lollipox]

Apologies in advance, this might be wayyyyy too much information. But it's helping me to write alla this out too. lol

 

 

 

Rewards & Motivators

 

Appointments and Outings
 

Prepare something to look forward to for after the event. Whether it's setting out a cup with a teabag or hot chocolate mix ready to be made when you get home, or planning something to watch (and maybe some snacks). Or giving yourself a budget of $$$ amount to spend on a toy, knick knack, iTunes, or whatever else to unwind after going out to do something you'd rather not have had to do.

 

 

Chores and House Crap

 

I haven't actually got off my ass to do this myself yet, but making a reusable chore chart that you can tick off with a whiteboard marker. It's kinda fun to make it, and to tick it off.

• 1 pc card or paper
• Stickers or whatever to decorate it
• List chores you do either weekly or bi-weekly, on the front and back
• And you use clear/transparent book covering adhesive to cover it
• You can make it as big or small as you want it to be. 
• I'm going to make mine the right size to fit into my journal 

 

Sticker Charting
 

Create a section for Sticker Charting in a notebook or journal. If you don't want to use an entirely new notebook, flip an existing one over and start from the back instead.

• Create a Points system that you're happy with.
• You could set different Point values per sticker type (e.g. sparkly or glittery stickers are worth 5-10pts, normal stickers are worth 1pt).
• Create an Exchange List of things you'll genuinely look forward to exchanging your Pts for later. 
• At the end of the month tally up your points and choose what you want to 'spend' them on. 

 

Rando Ideas for Pt Rewards

• Mystery Toys (if you like those)
• Funko Pop Dolls
• Movies or Music from whatever media purchasing app you use
• Make-up Items
• Supplies for a craft project
• Your favourite food or snacks
• Making a fort and spending the weekend in it (if you have space for this)
• Giving yourself a $$$ limit to go spend at a thrift store

It's not about the actual $$$ worth of the item, it's about how much it means to you personally. That's what I base my pt system on anyways. >.> 

Self Discipline

 

Sometimes you've just gotta do it. Challenging yourself to do things you don't wanna do (even if it's just a small social interaction) on a regular basis can help keep you from getting lazy with not doing things you probably should do. 

Like "Well I managed to do insert task here, which sucked and I didn't want to do it. I guess i can do insert alternative task here too."

 

Stopping bad habits is possibly harder than trying to learn good ones, imo. Because you've already been doing them and it's familiar and comfortable. It just takes time and retraining your brain to find the new habits comfortable and commonplace in your routines.
 

Routines

 

Routines that might help you keep things in order:

• Morning
• Dietary & Exercise (as in general lifestyle stuff, not restricting, only eating worms or extreme workouts)
• Bedtime
• Weekends & Free time

Morning routines are a good way to get your bod ready for waking up and facing the world and developing good habits. You don't have to get up and make a smoothie, eat a full breakfast, and be super pumped to be awake. Even if you just get up and zombie-walk around the house to get the day started, it's still something. 

E.g. Drag your a** outta bed, start the kettle for coffee or tea, go pee or whatever, have a snack or breakfast and watch something or listen to music while you're waking up.

 

Dietary & Exercise routines aren't about fad dieting or weight lifting, but about simple things like making sure you eat enough fruit or veggies and go for a stroll every now and again- or finding a form of exercise you enjoy more (swimming, trampolining, skip rope, cycling). Exercise is a good natural way to release endorphins and feel good about yourself, just like getting enough sunlight *hisses*.

 

Bedtime routine is important for unwinding at the end of the day, releasing tension, and getting some rest to start the following day. When I'm planning out my bedtime routines I start it a couple of hours before the time I intend to be in bed asleep by. It doesn't always work out- like right now I'm not in control of it because I gotta be up at dumb hours, night and day lol. And if you're attempting to do all 3 routines you're probably gonna be tired and ready for bed anyway, lol 

 

 

Organizational Apps
 

There are a few organizing, chore tracking and routine making apps around. I don't personally use them so I'm unfamiliar, but I occasionally use the Reminders app that came with my phone. And I set one repeat reminder to say like, "Eat enough veggies. Brush your teeth. Shower. Take vitamins or medicine. Drink plenty of water." for beginning and end of the day. 

 

 

Journaling

 

Keeping a journal is a great way to express yourself, be creative, keep track of plans and write notes or reminders.

If you want to separate Little stuff from your daily Adulting, you could use the back half for one category and the front half for the other. 

 

You can also create an envelope pocket at the front (by stapling/taping two pages together) for tucking your Chore Chart (ref above) in, so you can fill out your stickers at the end of the day, erase the chart and start again the next day. Aforementioned pocket could also be used to hold sticker sheets or bookmarks. 

 

It doesn't have to be cutesy. Halloween's coming up, you could go grab some Halloween stickers to get creative with or even print out some screenshots from your favourite horror movies and make collages on random pages. 

 

Examples

• List 'Little' activities you like doing, so when you don't know what you wanna do you have something to refer back to.
• ^ Favourite movies, favourite snacks or beverages etc.
• Bios for your favourite plushies or pets.

Anyways, that's the end of my essay. :"3 

It sounds like a lot of work, but you can always pick and choose different things that work for you as an individual. 

Edited September 9, 2019 by Guest

[Baby_Batz]

Holy guacamole that’s a lot of great ideas! Thank you guys so much!

Pox you could write a whole littles’ survival guide you got this down pat I love it!

Vanillababy you have such good examples, I think I’m going to try setting up a schedule and see how I do. Warm milk and new makeup sound so good rn!