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Big Book of Dad Jokes.


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Posted (edited)

What did Boomer parents do to kill boredom before the invention of the Internet?

 

 

 

 

I'm Gen X and I  asked my 6 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either!!

 

Stressed Family Life GIF by Team Kennedy

Edited by WizardofOSS
Posted

What do you call it when there's no Internet in Russia?

 

 

 

 

Internyet!

 

Russia Hackers GIF by BabylonBee

  • giggling 1
Posted

How do you get reliable Internet on a big Ranch?

 

 

 

 

Move the modem to the Barn for stable internet!

 

Nfts Yolo GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

I had a great response from people suggesting another word for Tavern,

 

 

 

 

I want to thank everyone for writing Inn!

 

Christmas Fall GIF

  • Eye Roll 1
Posted

(NSFW)

 

Spoiler

A Dwarf walks into a tavern and says, "Hello ladies! I am 4 feet 11 inches....and those are two different measurements!"

 

how to train your dragon animation GIF by Universal Kids

 

  • snickering 1
Posted

What do you call a homeless Horse?

 

 

 

 

An unstable Horse!

 

Pbs Nature Horse GIF by Nature on PBS

  • Eye Roll 1
Posted

Why did the Minstrel get kicked out of the Tavern?

 

 

 

He was Bard for life!

 

Throw Out GIF by SWR Kindernetz

  • snickering 1
Posted

In a Roleplaying Game, what do Bards drop when you kill them?

 

 

 

 

Lute!

 

el dorado GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

What do you call a homeless snail?

 

 

 

 

A Slug!

 

slug GIF

  • Eye Roll 1
Posted

What has eyes but cannot see?

 

 

 

 

 

Potatoes!

 

Tater Tots Hello GIF by Flat Bonnie

  • giggling 1
Posted

Sandy's mom has four kids named; North, West, East. What is the name of the fourth child?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, Sandy of course!

 

Scared Kids GIF by America's Funniest Home Videos 

  • snickering 1
Posted

What do you call a Room with no walls?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mushroom!

 

Mushroom Love GIF

  • Thank You 1
Posted

A Cruise ship sank in a storm and killed every single person. Who survived?

 

 

 

 

Married couples!

 

Sinking Classic Film GIF by Det Danske Filminstitut

  • snickering 1
Posted

Why did the Daddy Rabbit go to the barber?

 

 

 

 

He had too many Hares and he had to get clipped!

 

Bunny Rabbit GIF by Bronwyn Maloney

  • Eye Roll 1
Posted

What do you call a bird that can fly, but can't?

 

 

 

 

Jailbird

 

Jail Baddie GIF by Aardman Animations

  • giggling 1
Posted

Wise thoughts - "Man who run after car get exhausted, but then man who fall down and get run over by car get tired!" - Confucius

 

Fail Run Over GIF

Posted

Where do comedians find the best people to tell their jokes to?

 

 

 

In prisons, where they have captive audiences!

 

George Costanza Seinfeld GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of jail,

 


 

 

but apparently you can't end a sentence with a proposition.

 

Fail Tom Hiddleston GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

A prisoner digs a hole out of jail...

...and ends up in a Toddler Playground

and yells, "I'm Free, I'm Free!!"

 

 

A Toddler walks up and says, "So big deal, I'm Four!"

Happy Dance Kids GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

Why was Abraham Lincoln never put in jail?

 

 

 

 

Because he was in-a-cent!!

 

Grabbing Season 4 GIF by The Simpsons

  • giggling 1
Posted

Why did the cellphone go to jail?

 

 

 

 

It was charged with battery!

 

Phone Charging GIF

  • giggling 1
Posted

How do you stop a Rhinoceros from Charging?

 

 

 

 

Take away his credit cards!!

 

Exo Pay GIF by Express One

  • giggling 1
Posted

Did you hear about the two nuts who got mugged?

 

 

 

 

One was a salted!!

Insect Love GIF

  • Like 1
Guest yourmasterM
Posted

What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.

 

Guest yourmasterM
Posted

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
It’s fine. He woke up

 

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