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Big Book of Dad Jokes.


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Posted

What do you call a vampire obsessed with butts? Count crakula 

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Posted

My girlfriend poked me in the eye! So I stopped seeing her for a while

Posted

Who always has a backup plan ? Justin case

Posted

You know, Coffee is just Bean Tea.

 

 

 

 

Let that steep for a few minutes!

Adventure Time Coffee GIF by hoppip

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Posted

Did you hear about the Coffee Bean that committed murder?

 

 

 

 

 

It was Death by Decaffeination!

Movie Reaction GIF by Death Wish Coffee

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Posted

A group of Beans were traveling around France...

 

 

 

 

...They ended up in Cannes.

Love It Bbq GIF by StickerGiant

Posted

What kind of shoes to frogs wear?
 

Open-toad sandals

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Posted

I had a quiet game of tennis today.
There was no racket.

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Posted

Were did the pumpkins have their meeting?

 

In the gourdroom.

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Posted

What do you call a sheep who can sing and dance?
 

Lady Ba Ba.

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Posted

What do you call a dog who meditates?
 

Aware wolf.

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Posted
4 hours ago, SweetLittleDreamer said:

What kind of shoes to frogs wear?
 

Open-toad sandals

Hahaha

Posted
6 hours ago, WizardofOSS said:

Did you hear about the Coffee Bean that committed murder?

 

 

 

 

 

It was Death by Decaffeination!

Movie Reaction GIF by Death Wish Coffee

Haha haha

Posted

Chuck Norris was bitten by a snake once, and three days later...

 

 

 

 

 

...the snake died.

Knock Out Work GIF

Posted

Chuck Norris killed 50 enemies with a grenade...

 

 

 

 

 

...and then the grenade exploded.

Art Design Smoke GIF

Posted

Chuck Norris built the Hospital...

 

 

 

 

...he was born in.

leslie nielsen et GIF

Posted

What did Chuck Norris do when his parachute fail to open?

 

 

 

 

He brought it back for a refund.

Exit Skydive GIF by Albatros Fallschirmsport

Posted

Chuck Norris caught Covid-19 and the prognosis isn't good...

 

 

 

 

...anyone wanting to say goodbye to the Virus can visit the Hospital tonight.

Sick Corona GIF by deinechristine

Posted

Chuck Norris was petting a Tiger and suddenly the Tiger growled at him. The Zoo Keeper said, "Quietly, and slowly back away..."

 

 

 

 

 

...and the Tiger did.

Music Video GIF

Posted

The City was going to name a street in honor of Chuck Norris but then changed their mind and cancelled the idea...

 

 

 

 

 

 

...after they realized that nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

sacha baron cohen crossing street GIF

Posted

Chuck Norris once kicked a Horse in the chin....

 

 

 

 

 

...and that's how Giraffes were created!

giraffes fighting GIF

Posted

Chuck Norris once counted to Infinity...

 

 

 

 

 

...twice!

Star Wars Space GIF by Feliks Tomasz Konczakowski

Posted

It's a little know fact that Chuck Norris was dropped twice as a child when the family visited Japan...

 

 

 

 

...once in Hiroshima and again in Nagasaki.

destruction GIF

Posted

What kind of science does a  marionette use ?  String theory 

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Posted

My ex want me to call her tomorrow. I guess tomorrow and me have some stuff to discuss 

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