Feeling lost and lonely

[karan]

Do you ever feel like you are lost and lonely? Like whatever you do is not enough.
Lately I have been feeling so lost and tired of everything, I feel like so defeated like nothing is working out.
Maybe this is just a rant and maybe it is not allowed here.
If anyone is going through the same thing and wants to vent or someone to talk to I am here.
I have no one and I know what it feels like, I don't want anyone else to go through what I am with the feeling of not having someone here for them.

[SweetLittleDreamer]

I’m sorry that your feeling that way, it’s definitely a feeling that I can relate to.

 

[MasterPhotog]

@karan I just want to say that your message really resonates, and you're definitely not alone in feeling this way. Life can feel so heavy sometimes, and it’s completely okay to feel lost or exhausted — it doesn’t mean you’re failing or that your feelings aren’t valid.

Thank you for being so open and offering support to others, even when you’re struggling yourself. That shows a lot of strength and compassion. If you ever need someone to listen, to talk to, or just to sit in silence with you virtually, I’m here for you. We may not have all the answers, but sometimes just having someone to talk with makes a huge difference.

You’re not alone, even if it feels like it. One small step at a time — and you will get through this.

Here are a couple of things you want to apply to help you deal with such feelings: 

Practice Self-Compassion
Treat yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a friend. When you make mistakes or face setbacks, avoid harsh self-criticism. Instead, acknowledge your feelings and remind yourself that imperfection is part of being human.

Celebrate Small Wins and Qualities
Regularly acknowledge your efforts, strengths, and progress—no matter how minor. Keeping a journal or even making mental notes of what you did well each day builds a habit of recognizing your own worth.

Please take care and continue to be strong. 

[karan]

1 hour ago, SweetLittleDreamer said:

I’m sorry that your feeling that way, it’s definitely a feeling that I can relate to.

 

Thank you.

[karan]

@MasterPhotogThank you so much for your thoughtful words. They really mean a lot to me right now. It’s easy to get caught up in the feeling of being alone or that things won’t get better, but hearing that I’m not alone in this helps more than I can express.

[MissAnna]

1 hour ago, karan said:

Do you ever feel like you are lost and lonely? Like whatever you do is not enough.
Lately I have been feeling so lost and tired of everything, I feel like so defeated like nothing is working out.
Maybe this is just a rant and maybe it is not allowed here.
If anyone is going through the same thing and wants to vent or someone to talk to I am here.
I have no one and I know what it feels like, I don't want anyone else to go through what I am with the feeling of not having someone here for them.

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way, you are not alone I promise you that. 

So many times in life we feel that we are running a race that can never be won. It's not an uncommon feeling to have, so many people feel lost and alone. 

In times of darkness thats when we truly need a friend to rely on. 

Please remember my door is always open, I will always talk to anyone who needs a friend. 

The most beautiful thing about this community is someone will always be there for you no matter what.

That's why I absolutely love being apart of this community 

 

[MasterPhotog]

1 hour ago, karan said:

@MasterPhotogThank you so much for your thoughtful words. They really mean a lot to me right now. It’s easy to get caught up in the feeling of being alone or that things won’t get better, but hearing that I’m not alone in this helps more than I can express.

@karan 

You're very welcome. You're right—it’s easy to get caught up in feelings of loneliness or believe that things won’t improve. But as you mentioned, just knowing that we’re not alone can make a big difference.

At my age, I’ve had more than my fair share of disappointments. That said, here are a few principles I try to follow that help me keep going:

• Everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about. Be kind, loving, and non-judgmental toward others.
• Acknowledge your own achievements and successes. You are special, including having flaws and all. Be kind and loving to yourself, too.
• Life is short. Take things one day at a time—remember, not every problem needs to be solved all at once.
• If something’s weighing on your mind, make a temporary decision to set it aside before bed. Revisit it with a fresh perspective in the morning.
• Prioritize good sleep. Your bed is for rest, not for making big decisions.
• Eat well, sleep enough, love yourself and others, and find joy in life whenever you can.

Remember, we're here for you anytime you want to talk about anything.

[MrJJ]

3 hours ago, karan said:

Do you ever feel like you are lost and lonely? Like whatever you do is not enough.

Oh boy, do I, lol. Not only do I suffer majorly from depression, I believe I have a personality disorder, if not multiple different ones (I suspect Borderline that possibly reaches into a dissociative disorder, but not DID.)

I've been writing about and documenting my experiences in different ways for different professionals. I have a 9 page write-up, but also a 1 page "quick overview" of everything. Here's a small overview of what it feels like to me, but I expanded on it about 5 times as much in a different document:

"My inability to function on my own presents itself as lack of goals, ambitions, and sense of accomplishment. Performing solo activities feels pointless, hopeless, and uninteresting. This is a lack of sense of self, causing difficulty in finding meaning in anything besides work and relationship, which leads me to become anxious and afraid to be alone. I move quickly into both and cling to them in an unhealthy matter, relying on them to give meaning where I am unable to find it within myself. These are the fields that cause the most stressors, but also suffer the most from the outcome of my destructive behavior. When one is effected negatively, the other is impacted as well, which creates a toxic "back and forth" between wanting to get away from the stress and obsessively needing them to fulfill my needs."

I'm currently 40 years old and feel more lost, more afraid, more hopeless, overall worse-off than the depressed 14-15 year old I was over 20 years ago.

I've been enjoying looking into psychology related disorders and learning about how it applies to myself and others. I'm always open to talk to people that are having issues!

*edit: Fun fact! I noticed everyone else here said things like "sorry you feel that way." I've realized I tend to make everything about myself, my thoughts, my experience, and tend to show only a surface level of empathy. I, by design, can NOT be a narcissist (no delusions of grandeur, no unrealistically high self worth, etc.,) but damn, I really do make everything about me, lol. I'm not entirely sure why I don't seem to process how others feel, can't wait to hear what my therapist thinks of it."

Edited May 28 by MrJJ

[karan]

2 hours ago, MissAnna said:

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way, you are not alone I promise you that. 

So many times in life we feel that we are running a race that can never be won. It's not an uncommon feeling to have, so many people feel lost and alone. 

In times of darkness thats when we truly need a friend to rely on. 

Please remember my door is always open, I will always talk to anyone who needs a friend. 

The most beautiful thing about this community is someone will always be there for you no matter what.

That's why I absolutely love being apart of this community 

 

Thank you so much for saying that. It means a lot to hear those words. Knowing there's always a place to turn to makes all the difference. I’m really grateful to be part of this community too. It’s a rare kind of support we’ve got here. My doors are always open too for anyone that needs to talk or vent, I will always be here to listen.

Edited May 28 by karan

[MasterPhotog]

@MrJJ Thank you so much for sharing this. The depth of your self-awareness, even in the midst of so much pain and confusion, is really striking. It takes a lot of strength to explore and express such complex inner experiences, and even more to keep showing up for yourself through writing, reflection, and seeking help.

What you described — the emptiness, the fear of being alone, the push-pull between wanting connection and feeling overwhelmed by it — it all sounds incredibly heavy to carry. It makes a lot of sense that work and relationships become both lifelines and sources of stress when the inner foundation feels unstable. You're not alone in feeling like that cycle is hard to break.

Also, the fact that you're actively learning about psychology, putting effort into documentation, and being open to therapy — those are all meaningful steps, even if they don’t feel that way right now. Growth often happens in really quiet ways that are easy to overlook when you're struggling just to get through the day.

And I really appreciate your edit — being able to notice patterns in how you relate to others and talk about yourself isn’t something everyone can do. That kind of insight might not feel helpful yet, but it’s a powerful part of healing.

You're not broken or too much — you're a person trying to make sense of a very difficult internal world. Please be gentle with yourself in the process. You’re doing the best you can with a lot, and that really matters.

Feel free to reach out if you ever need someone to just listen or reflect, we're here for you. Best wishes!

[karan]

1 hour ago, MasterPhotog said:

@karan 

You're very welcome. You're right—it’s easy to get caught up in feelings of loneliness or believe that things won’t improve. But as you mentioned, just knowing that we’re not alone can make a big difference.

At my age, I’ve had more than my fair share of disappointments. That said, here are a few principles I try to follow that help me keep going:

• Everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about. Be kind, loving, and non-judgmental toward others.
• Acknowledge your own achievements and successes. You are special, including having flaws and all. Be kind and loving to yourself, too.
• Life is short. Take things one day at a time—remember, not every problem needs to be solved all at once.
• If something’s weighing on your mind, make a temporary decision to set it aside before bed. Revisit it with a fresh perspective in the morning.
• Prioritize good sleep. Your bed is for rest, not for making big decisions.
• Eat well, sleep enough, love yourself and others, and find joy in life whenever you can.

Remember, we're here for you anytime you want to talk about anything.

I really appreciate you opening up and sharing this. Those principles you live by hit home for me especially the one about giving yourself grace. It’s easy to forget that we’re allowed to stumble and still be enough. Life’s tough, but hearing this from someone who’s been through it gives me strength. Thanks for being real about it all.

[karan]

1 hour ago, MrJJ said:

Oh boy, do I, lol. Not only do I suffer majorly from depression, I believe I have a personality disorder, if not multiple different ones (I suspect Borderline that possibly reaches into a dissociative disorder, but not DID.)

I've been writing about and documenting my experiences in different ways for different professionals. I have a 9 page write-up, but also a 1 page "quick overview" of everything. Here's a small overview of what it feels like to me, but I expanded on it about 5 times as much in a different document:

"My inability to function on my own presents itself as lack of goals, ambitions, and sense of accomplishment. Performing solo activities feels pointless, hopeless, and uninteresting. This is a lack of sense of self, causing difficulty in finding meaning in anything besides work and relationship, which leads me to become anxious and afraid to be alone. I move quickly into both and cling to them in an unhealthy matter, relying on them to give meaning where I am unable to find it within myself. These are the fields that cause the most stressors, but also suffer the most from the outcome of my destructive behavior. When one is effected negatively, the other is impacted as well, which creates a toxic "back and forth" between wanting to get away from the stress and obsessively needing them to fulfill my needs."

I'm currently 40 years old and feel more lost, more afraid, more hopeless, overall worse-off than the depressed 14-15 year old I was over 20 years ago.

I've been enjoying looking into psychology related disorders and learning about how it applies to myself and others. I'm always open to talk to people that are having issues!

*edit: Fun fact! I noticed everyone else here said things like "sorry you feel that way." I've realized I tend to make everything about myself, my thoughts, my experience, and tend to show only a surface level of empathy. I, by design, can NOT be a narcissist (no delusions of grandeur, no unrealistically high self worth, etc.,) but damn, I really do make everything about me, lol. I'm not entirely sure why I don't seem to process how others feel, can't wait to hear what my therapist thinks of it."

I really respect how open you are about everything. It’s clear you’ve put a lot of thought into what you’re going through, and that self-awareness is powerful. I hear you on feeling lost and clinging to things for meaning it’s tough. But just the fact that you’re reflecting and learning is progress. And offering support to others is huge, even if it’s not always easy to connect perfectly. You’re doing the work, even when it doesn’t feel like it.

[MrJJ]

  

29 minutes ago, karan said:

I really respect how open you are about everything. It’s clear you’ve put a lot of thought into what you’re going through, and that self-awareness is powerful.

So on a regular day, I'm very insightful about everything, I over-think everything (that's my anxiety super power, lol.) People have always come to me for guidance or help my ENTIRE life (and I honestly don't know why.) Yet somehow, I was VERY UNAWARE of the fact the way I was acting had been irrational and even delusional (those nasty fears that I'm not good enough and my partner is going to leave me, or projecting my stress of life on a relationship/partner and feeling like they're failing, etc.) 

It's taken until now for me to be able to look back and analyze myself, my thoughts, my actions, to realize that they WERE NOT normal or rational. It's also taken a lot of research into psychology and the effects of disorders like BPD, OCD, anxiety, depression, etc. to even find the words and means to express what I've been doing. There's no way I could have told someone that I experience things like "I have large shifts in emotions that seem to have their own self-contained ecosystems, where my views of myself and others change drastically, and as I shift from one to the next, the previous QUICKLY becomes a vague and hazy memory, making it feel like I'm experiencing multiple personalities, which are just different versions of 'myself.'" That entire concept is wild and existential in nature, but that's really what it feels like to me.

I've found a LOT of power in the way to express what's happening properly, so my goal is to help others understand what may be going on with them better, allowing them to say the things they need to say to get the help they need. How do you even convey feeling like you have multiple personalities but they're all you? That seemed like such an impossible task before. Being open, honest, and having the verbiage to get the point across accurately is invaluable, so I hope to inspire others to express themselves like I do! *phew* Hope that makes sense... even if I can't show the empathy, I'm trying to help, lol.

Edited May 28 by MrJJ

[beanbean]

5 hours ago, karan said:

Do you ever feel like you are lost and lonely? Like whatever you do is not enough.
Lately I have been feeling so lost and tired of everything, I feel like so defeated like nothing is working out.
Maybe this is just a rant and maybe it is not allowed here.
If anyone is going through the same thing and wants to vent or someone to talk to I am here.
I have no one and I know what it feels like, I don't want anyone else to go through what I am with the feeling of not having someone here for them.

I have felt like that kinda have keep reminding  myself how important yourself just try to not let negative self talk win even tho it’s hard

[MrJJ]

Just now, beanbean said:

I have felt like that kinda have keep reminding  myself how important yourself just try to not let negative self talk win even tho it’s hard

"maladaptive behavior" is what I've heard this referred to as. Typically a "defense mechanism" or generally negative thinking stemming from things like PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc. I've been watching a lot of YouTube videos from Dr. Daniel Fox, mostly on his topics of BPD and narcissistic parents (realized my dad 10,000% has Narcissist Personality Disorder and bipolar 1.)

[beanbean]

1 hour ago, MrJJ said:

"maladaptive behavior" is what I've heard this referred to as. Typically a "defense mechanism" or generally negative thinking stemming from things like PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc. I've been watching a lot of YouTube videos from Dr. Daniel Fox, mostly on his topics of BPD and narcissistic parents (realized my dad 10,000% has Narcissist Personality Disorder and bipolar 1.)

I don’t think it is narcissistic I think there is a balance between hating yourself and thinking your the best but our brains due tend to beat ourselves in to the ground I am just talking about positive self talk 

[Kajinn]

On 5/28/2025 at 9:50 AM, karan said:

Do you ever feel like you are lost and lonely? Like whatever you do is not enough.
Lately I have been feeling so lost and tired of everything, I feel like so defeated like nothing is working out.
Maybe this is just a rant and maybe it is not allowed here.
If anyone is going through the same thing and wants to vent or someone to talk to I am here.
I have no one and I know what it feels like, I don't want anyone else to go through what I am with the feeling of not having someone here for them.

You're not alone, my friend 😌

I'm just thinking openly here but I feel like the stuff that gets demanded of us or expected of us is more than insane, it's absolutely 100% unreasonable for anyone.

I mean, we're asked to spend the majority of our day (and subsequently our life) working at some job that we gaslight ourselves into thinking we want / or is good for us just to get paper that will 'show our worth' to society. If we want to do something else we suffer consequences. Whether that's shame from peers, starving, etc.

It feels like everything from social life to work life is so overtuned that if you don't behave in the expected way you get looked down upon. We're often taught in schools that who we are isn't good enough to get jobs so we have to 'grow up' and change ourselves to fit in, 'be more professional', etc.

We're told that we're supposed to have a house by this age or married by this age, have kids by this age, work a reputable, high quality, high paying job, have many friends, be in peak physical shape, contribute to the community, etc. etc.

The list never ends and there is always something to compare yourself to 😅

Which is why I may not know what you're going through but it's okay to feel your feelings or to feel lost. I'm here for ya, It's really unfair that we're expected of so much.

We may not know each other but I know you're good enough. In fact all of us have been good enough since we were born. You deserve happiness, you deserve to be loved and you deserve to be here. It's okay to be human.

It may be comforting but, in some strange way we're all lonely together.

I also think there's an unspoken crisis going on, it feels like everyone gets the bare minimum for social needs nowadays. Idk it's that strange feeling being around friends or family but still feeling alone but maybe that's just me.

Sorry for the long rant, Just know that this stranger here hopes that things go well for you, and I hope that you succeed in life and get everything you want, friend. I'm rooting for you.

And if you or anyone else ever needs to talk or needs somebody to listen, my door is always open 😊

[karan]

21 hours ago, Kajinn said:

You're not alone, my friend 😌

I'm just thinking openly here but I feel like the stuff that gets demanded of us or expected of us is more than insane, it's absolutely 100% unreasonable for anyone.

I mean, we're asked to spend the majority of our day (and subsequently our life) working at some job that we gaslight ourselves into thinking we want / or is good for us just to get paper that will 'show our worth' to society. If we want to do something else we suffer consequences. Whether that's shame from peers, starving, etc.

It feels like everything from social life to work life is so overtuned that if you don't behave in the expected way you get looked down upon. We're often taught in schools that who we are isn't good enough to get jobs so we have to 'grow up' and change ourselves to fit in, 'be more professional', etc.

We're told that we're supposed to have a house by this age or married by this age, have kids by this age, work a reputable, high quality, high paying job, have many friends, be in peak physical shape, contribute to the community, etc. etc.

The list never ends and there is always something to compare yourself to 😅

Which is why I may not know what you're going through but it's okay to feel your feelings or to feel lost. I'm here for ya, It's really unfair that we're expected of so much.

We may not know each other but I know you're good enough. In fact all of us have been good enough since we were born. You deserve happiness, you deserve to be loved and you deserve to be here. It's okay to be human.

It may be comforting but, in some strange way we're all lonely together.

I also think there's an unspoken crisis going on, it feels like everyone gets the bare minimum for social needs nowadays. Idk it's that strange feeling being around friends or family but still feeling alone but maybe that's just me.

Sorry for the long rant, Just know that this stranger here hopes that things go well for you, and I hope that you succeed in life and get everything you want, friend. I'm rooting for you.

And if you or anyone else ever needs to talk or needs somebody to listen, my door is always open 😊

Hey, thank you for this. Seriously. It means a lot to hear words like that, especially when things feel overwhelming. You're right, it is a lot, and it’s easy to feel like we’re all just trying to survive under the weight of expectations. What you said about being lonely together really hit home.

Just wanted you to know I hear you too. And I’m rooting for you right back. You’re not alone in this. ❤️

[Daddy dom 82]

I also been having them feelings, been having a rough year, was gonna do a post a few times ive started but deleted it thinking no one would care to be honest...  my dad passed away last year not long after his birthday an just before Christmas. We had plans to actually go spend Christmas with him like we was every holiday. My dad passed away thinking 2 other people would help with the funeral an me do all his wishes , to just find out it was all me an a bit of help from his daughter who was adopted before he even new he had a daughter... Well took a year to pay the funeral home off an finally this year we got his plot an stone an getting buried end of jun ... I been going through high depression so haven't been on much .. I feel lost an like im not here a lot till lately, but sill is hard among dealing with life stuff to ... Ur definitely not alone .... If i shared to much welcome to delete, but also welcome to message an chat even if u need a friend or feel alone 

[SquirtleSquad]

This post really struck me deep. Thank you so much for posting it. I not only enjoyed reading your original, but also the responses. I’ve learned a lot from it. I didn’t realize there was others that felt lost and lonely. The last part in your post really resonated with me. I feel the same way, if you need someone to be there for you. I’d be happy too. Ever since I was a younger I’ve felt like I could be surrounded by people physically, but still all alone. None of them knew me, or made any effort to see all the different things about me that make me who I am. Now, I’m in a room by myself most days. It feels so difficult sometimes.