Little_Zaheera Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 Good evening, good morningâwherever you are in this wild, aching, beautiful world. How are you, really? Not the smile you wear for othersâbut the quiet truth under your skin. Have you been breathing okay? Sleeping? Eating enough to feel like you're still here? Iâm writing this with a full heart and a trembling one. Because being someone with BPD and an INFJ mind is like walking through fire barefoot, while holding a candle for others. You feel everythingâtoo much, too fast, too deeplyâand then blame yourself for bleeding. I grew up in a house where love was conditional, if it existed at all. I was the wrong shape, the wrong gender, the wrong weight, the wrong kind of sensitive. I learned to shrink before I learned to speak. I learned to perform before I learned to rest. And when the world mirrored that pain back at me, I believed it. I let it define me. But here's what I'm slowly unlearning: I am not the words that broke me. I am not the silence that followed. I am not unworthy just because someone else couldnât love me well. If you're like meâwired for empathy, haunted by abandonment, walking around with scars nobody seesâI want you to know this: Youâre not too much. Youâre not a burden. Youâre not broken beyond repair. Sometimes the most tender souls were never taught how to hold themselves. But we can learn. We are learning. Itâs okay to start over. Itâs okay to take a break. Itâs okay to say âThis hurtsâ and not have a solution. You deserve soft love. You deserve safe love. You deserve to be chosen without needing to prove your worth first. And even when you canât believe any of that, Iâll believe it for you. To anyone who needs to hear this today: You are not alone in the storm. You are not the chaos inside your chest. You are more than survival. You are art. You are wildflowers breaking through concrete. You are the story still being written. My inbox is always open if you need a friend or a reminder that you matter. Because you do. So much more than you know. With love, Someone still learning how to love herself too đżđ¤ 2 1 1 8 2
NR_Daddy Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 Such thoughtful and considered words. What an amazing person you are! 1
Little_Zaheera Posted June 7 Author Report Posted June 7 That is really sweet of you to say! I just think more people than we think are struggling so if my words resonate, then, it was worth the post âşď¸ 1
NR_Daddy Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 You are without any doubt correct. However it is difficult to find someone to open up to about these things, especially if you have been burned in the past by someone who claimed they cared and showed otherwise.
Little_Zaheera Posted June 7 Author Report Posted June 7 (edited) Oh for sure! I have been burned so much, but you learn slowly that their rejection does not make it true. I also realised I posted this in the wrong section so will respost if you want to carry on chatting there :). Will post in general discussion:Â Â Edited June 7 by Little_Zaheera 1
NR_Daddy Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 @Little_Zaheera Are you intending to ask for this post to be removed? I can duplicate my answers on your new one if so.
NR_Daddy Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 1 minute ago, Little_Zaheera said: Not sure how to go about deleting it... The forum Admins can delete it, but I also believe they can also move topics to the correct section if requested. @shadowrider and @PigtailPrincess are both admins on the forum, and you'd usually have to request it from them.
.ŕ¸âđďžŕšá°ÎąÎąÎą .á Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 Not an admin, but idky you'd think this needs a repost? This is also a discussion forum, but that's for you/admin to decide. My main reason for posting here, is that I wanted to share some important info with a fellow BPDer.  1 1
.ŕ¸âđďžŕšá°ÎąÎąÎą .á Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 I hope you're safe and are getting adequate treatment for it. I know it's a rough condition to have. You are worthy of unconditional love and inner peace. I hope you find both. And thanks for taking the time to share positive affirmations, I know they'll brighten the day. 1
Little_Zaheera Posted June 7 Author Report Posted June 7 Awww thank you - yes very safe. I wasn't always, but now I am. It is very rough and I just wanted people to feel loved and know they are not alone . 1
.ŕ¸âđďžŕšá°ÎąÎąÎą .á Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 Glad to hear that you're safe as well! I know what it's like to finally be free too, so I completely understand the stressful burden being lifted once finally out of that kind of situation. And that's exactly why I make PSAs, lol. Reinforces that you're not alone and that help is out there. Anyways, I hope you're having a good timezone~ 1 1
.ŕ¸âđďžŕšá°ÎąÎąÎą .á Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 Well, idk if I agree that I'm awesome, in fact, I think I'm pretty lame, but we can still be friends, lmao.  1 1
beanbean Posted June 7 Report Posted June 7 51 minutes ago, .ŕ¸âđďžŕšá°ÎąÎąÎą .á said: Well, idk if I agree that I'm awesome, in fact, I think I'm pretty lame, but we can still be friends, lmao.   4 hours ago, Little_Zaheera said: Good evening, good morningâwherever you are in this wild, aching, beautiful world. How are you, really? Not the smile you wear for othersâbut the quiet truth under your skin. Have you been breathing okay? Sleeping? Eating enough to feel like you're still here? Iâm writing this with a full heart and a trembling one. Because being someone with BPD and an INFJ mind is like walking through fire barefoot, while holding a candle for others. You feel everythingâtoo much, too fast, too deeplyâand then blame yourself for bleeding. I grew up in a house where love was conditional, if it existed at all. I was the wrong shape, the wrong gender, the wrong weight, the wrong kind of sensitive. I learned to shrink before I learned to speak. I learned to perform before I learned to rest. And when the world mirrored that pain back at me, I believed it. I let it define me. But here's what I'm slowly unlearning: I am not the words that broke me. I am not the silence that followed. I am not unworthy just because someone else couldnât love me well. If you're like meâwired for empathy, haunted by abandonment, walking around with scars nobody seesâI want you to know this: Youâre not too much. Youâre not a burden. Youâre not broken beyond repair. Sometimes the most tender souls were never taught how to hold themselves. But we can learn. We are learning. Itâs okay to start over. Itâs okay to take a break. Itâs okay to say âThis hurtsâ and not have a solution. You deserve soft love. You deserve safe love. You deserve to be chosen without needing to prove your worth first. And even when you canât believe any of that, Iâll believe it for you. To anyone who needs to hear this today: You are not alone in the storm. You are not the chaos inside your chest. You are more than survival. You are art. You are wildflowers breaking through concrete. You are the story still being written. My inbox is always open if you need a friend or a reminder that you matter. Because you do. So much more than you know. With love, Someone still learning how to love herself too đżđ¤ This all rings very true 1
CupcakeSparklies Posted Friday at 04:31 AM Report Posted Friday at 04:31 AM (edited) Thank you for this. From another BPDer, this made me cry. Edited Friday at 04:32 AM by CupcakeSparklies 1
Little_Zaheera Posted Friday at 08:48 AM Author Report Posted Friday at 08:48 AM @CupcakeSparklies You are never alone, love. Reach out anytime Â
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