a little Jealousy??
Posted 10 January 2017 - 10:59 PM
Guest_Candy Minx ♡_*
Posted 10 January 2017 - 11:37 PM
I've found myself in past relationships to be very jealous of other women that
my then boyfriend would talk to, hang out with, etc - but I found that it was
due to my lack of trust in them, it didn't help that they were online relationships
so i was partly at a loss, my insecurities didn't help the cause.
with my current boyfriend, my Daddy, i rarely experience jealousy anymore,
mostly due to the fact of my deep trust in him, the comfort in my relationship,
although when i do get jealous these days, which isn't as often, it's because
all of the people who get to have contact with him irl and i do not. but also
because i know he desires me and only me -- we've also met up irl quite a
few times and i spent the summer with him but that was just me, it doesn't
mean it's necessarily the reason behind all jealously cases.
generally i remind myself that he's only interested in me and no one else,
that his heart is mine, but also that i'll get to be with him when we get to
move in together. my situation was fixed with trust in my partner and
addressing my insecurities.
being jealous is pretty normal in any kind of relationship, it's more along
the lines of addressing and managing it, not letting it get out of hand. it
also might help if you talk to your daddy about how you feel, reassurance
to your end might help.
Posted 10 January 2017 - 11:55 PM
I get jealous af... I just thought it was because I had been cheated on so many times. I really didn't start out that way. My last relationship I swallowed any jealous feelings and gave my parner the space to do their thing. Now she's engaged to a 'friend' of ours and I'm single. I think if you have jealous feelings it's for a reason and there's not enough trust and loyalty in the relationship... Just my opinion, coming from someone that's been cheated on four times. Now I just want to find someone I can leave tied up in the bedroom, haha. Can't go sleep with my friends then can you.
Edited by ewest, 10 January 2017 - 11:58 PM.
Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:38 AM
I personally, am not jealous but i am very possessive, and i dont give trust very easily, so if my partner was giving me reason to be jealous, i wouldnt allow it for very long. I guess, confidence in yourself is the best way to guard against jealousy.
Posted 11 January 2017 - 01:54 PM
As a polyamorous individual, I get asked about jealousy a lot! I've heard that my advice rings true for those in monogamous relationships too, so I'll offer a spoonful of it here and you can take what you want from it.
Whenever I feel jealousy in my relationships, instead of running from it or treating it like a warning sign of negative things to come, I get to know my jealousy. I call it "sitting with" my jealousy. I embrace it, lean into it, look deep into it's proverbial eyes and truly try to understand the root fear. Usually, it ends up being something silly like "This person doesn't care about me." or "I'm not enough for this person." or "I am unimportant to this person." Once I figure out why I'm experiencing the feeling, I can address the root of the problem faster and figure out what I need to feel reassured again.
Communicate openly with your partner about your jealousy. Even if it feels silly, or wrong. You can even say "I feel really silly right now, but this is how I'm feeling." if it helps you. Good luck!
Little Girl at Heart. Proud Queen. Spiritualist.
Stuffie Cuddler. Fort Creator. Secret Keeper.
Shooting Star Wisher. Dreamer.
Happily involved with both a Triad relationship with a Beast, and Girlfriend/Little, as well as two long-distance Dom/Caregivers.
Posted 14 January 2017 - 01:46 AM
The effect this has had is like the post mentioned above, you are sat down square with your jealousy and you look at it and see where it comes from. For me it usually is that I'm not wanted.
From doing this I don't get jealous as much now, so it's helped.
But I also know I'm not going to be poly much longer. I can feel myself winding down from that and looking for a committed exclusive relationship again.
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