Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Ddlg is something that I need in my life, but my last Daddy ended up being a very bad Daddy. He became abusive and would get mad at me for being in my little space and eventually made me ashamed of myself and wanting to have my little space. I need a Daddy in my life, but I don't want to get hurt like that again. Do I start online or with a long distance Daddy until I'm comfortable and feel safe with him? Very sad and lonely little here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkunkPrincess Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Hey, I have experienced the same thing. Before I knew what DDLG or Little Space actually was, I still felt little, cute and wanted someone to take care of me. My ex did NOT like that and he would always scream at me when I tried to act cute, he would call me really mean names, he would even pull my hair and trow me on the floor. He wasn't abusive JUST because I was little, but you get the idea. He manipulated me and even cheated on me. I was still in love with him because I have seperation anxiety. I was broken, insecure and I was ashamed of myself. At the same time, I had a really good friend who helped me trough and even helped me to leave my Ex. My friend was in love with me for like 4 years, and at some point I fell in love with him. He made me feel protected. Later, when I found out what DDLG was, I introduced him with it. He is now my caregiver and dom. What I am trying to say with this little story. There are ALWAYS caregivers out there, but they are just hard to find. The chances are really small you will be hurt again like that. The best thing you should do is find someone, get really close to them and slowly try to introduce them to DDLG. Only if you really trust that person and you feel like he trusts you back. It might take some time but maybe you will ever find a good Daddy who will love you, take care of you and make you feel good about yourself again. You should always remember that you are beautiful the way you are and you should never ever change yourself or think that you aren't perfect. I wish you the best of luck to find a good, caring Daddy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 I'm so sorry you had to go through what I did. Thank you so much for your kind words. My little space is very important to me, and i dont ever want it to be used against me again. I'm hopeful that there is someone out there who will love and respect me and my needs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkunkPrincess Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 It is horrible when people use others their little space against them. Littles should feel safe and loved. I'm hopeful for you to find a good Daddy (-: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Thank you *huggles and love* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sighing Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Sorry to hear about both of your situations. To Nya, I'm glad you've found someone who brings you happiness. Tattooed, there are terrible people out there as you've witnessed first hand, but there are good ones too. Don't let the bad people prevent you from seeking out the good ones. I know it can be difficult to figure out which is which initially, but that's why you should give it a lot of time before jumping into things. When you meet someone you may be interested, don't be so quick to give your heart out. Get to really know them first before you commit. If they're really who they say they are, they'll be willing to wait.Best of luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Thank you, Sighing, I appreciate that. I'm definitely going to take things slower this time around, and I definitely won't hold my past experiences against my present or future ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Princessaj Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Hi thanks for sharing and letting us offer support. "Friends First." Making a friend is a lifelong and holy thing. Taking care of each other as friends is one of the highest gifts on earth and totally underrated. Having a friend accept, support and cheer you on as a little is proof that they will love you entirely including a DDlg dynamic. If a guy/gal Daddy/Mommy doesn't know how to be friends first then it is very unlikely that they will be able to be a trusted Caregiver for the long haul. Think about making a list of "friend" activities that will show how this person is truly interested in you, your "Adult" and little. I think of things like that of everyday life...they may sound silly, but they are real. You can always choose your own. 1. Going to the grocery store with you or for you and cooking a meal. Nourishment is an act of love and it doesn't have to be a 7 course meal or expensive. 2. Taking you to the Dr. and practicing your wellness plan with you. This is the core of care, knowledge and applying it. 3. Choosing to volunteer with you more than one time, this will show you their compassion in the world for others outside of yourselves. Do they smile or do they complain? 4. Involving you in their family and friends. Seeing how their family and friends treat them tells you a lot about how they will treat you. 5. Are they happy with their job or do they hate it? One's work really affects us as friends. If they love it, why and find ways to encourage them. If they don't, are they taking actions to do something about it? I like helping people seek their work happy place. I have learned that so many people say they want to find better and don't. You will either have to accept this in them or not. The same applies of them to you and your work situation. Do they support you or help you to find a better more fulfilling situation. Even if you in a long distance relationship LDR, you can still carry them with you and they with you on Skype and FaceTime on your mobile phone to have these experiences together. There is no excuse not to make time and be present even if its virtual. I know none of this is sitting on Daddy's lap and having our hair brushed or splashing in bubble baths...but that will happen, as real life is first no matter how much I don't want to believe it myself. Life is long, things happen and friends are sent to us for a reason. Some, we don't even know we need. Hugs. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 Thank you, Princessaj. All of those things are just as important to me as finding a loving Daddy to take bubble baths with and have him brush my hair and love on me. I want to find my forever Daddy, so I need to find someone who is as serious about it as I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
middlebabygirl Posted February 26, 2017 Report Share Posted February 26, 2017 I'm sorry you went through this. First of all, I want to tell you that you are beautiful and do not be ashamed to be who you are. If this daddy was cruel to you, you can be sure that there are many daddys want to give affection and love. A relationship needs a lot of trust, so it may take a while for you to find a real daddy who loves you and cares for you. Look for a partner, someone you like and respect. Someone who will always respect you. Reciprocity. The important thing is that you feel good and comfortable. Now, before looking for a daddy, take care of yourself, you will feel more confident. Take care Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Little Kitten Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 I had a daddy like that too. It was very bad for me. It damaged my little space and now i dont know whether im in it or not. My true little girl self is to scared to come back out. Im sorry that, that happened to you. its a very damaging process, but try to find a daddy that is good for you. There are plenty of loving and caring daddy's on this sight. Find one that you thing is nice and you can usually tell by the first few messages if they are right for you. I hope you find a daddy that treats you nice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tattooed.Little Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JayMcCrazie013 Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 I've never had a daddy beside my last and current one. . . But I do know what it's like to be abused. I've always been little but I never showed it because I didn't wanna get hit more than usual. I'm sorry stuff like this happens to people, especially people who just want love. It's really bad and terrible, it's best to be careful with a new daddy but don't be afraid to let yourself go. My current daddy, before I even called him daddy the first time, we had an adult talk about it and it's all okay and understood now. He didn't even know what ddlg was but he loved to care for me, Maybe you should have an adult talk about it when you find a new daddy so you both understand what the other needs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Waiting4us Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 There are lots who are fake and many more who cannot be serious when time comes. I am sorry you had a rough time but be grateful to Source that he is gone from your life now. Respect is first thing important in a Ddlg or any relationship. As many mentioned become friend first and be a friend so that a mutual closeness with understanding takes place. Relationship means to relate not to be possessive of the other. Just be you, always remember we are responsible to ourselves and no other person should be given the power to take our freedom and happiness away. Be as you wish and the best person will be the one who allows you and accepts you as you are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dahturtle Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 Im sorry that happen'd to you hun if i could i would find the daddy that made you afraid of being a little and punch him in the face people like that sometimes make me sick to be a daddy because theres people like that on here that use abuse and hurt litttles just for fun those are not true daddies those are fakes through and through. dont let people like that get you down hun theres a ton of real daddies who are serious and not abusive at all you just gotta be patient about it and get to know them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EllaDawn Posted February 27, 2017 Report Share Posted February 27, 2017 I am so sorry. Those are the so-called Daddies that I want to smack the crap out of. I'm a middle and I tend to feel super protective of other littles. I've had a lot of breakups in my life. The most traumatic was not my first marriage - it was my first Daddy. I ended up heartbroken and homeless and with a lot of landmines and triggers from things that had happened during the relationship. After that I stifled my middle side for a long time. There is hope - there are a lot of Daddies out there who will cherish that side of you - and even just men you might fall in love with who might embrace that side of you and explore becoming a Daddy - I've seen it happen. Your little side is part of you. For now, while you're alone, make sure you are embracing and nurturing your little side. Find things you can do to bring her out and feel comfortable again. Meeting someone local is of course always optimal, but yes, online and long-distance relationships can help you to regain your confidence and comfort. Are there local Bigs and Littles munches or things like Little Scouts near you? Groups like Little Scouts especially - they allow you to indulge your little side without emphasis on the DD/lg or CG/l dynamic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeathDaddy Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 NyaKitty, I had a similar but different experience. A friend I knew in high school was having a hard time with her "Abusive" boyfriend. They broke up and she started flirting with me the same day(Should've taken that as a warning). I dated her for a while and she told me about DDlg and I became her Daddy. She cheated on me, lied to me and hit me when she was upset. I had abandonment issues and trust issues though. I couldn't leave her since I wanted to be happy with her. One time our fight led to me getting kicked, hit and shoved against all the stuff in my place. I don't hit people anymore since I had anger issues as a kid and I don't want to be like that again. I told her this and I feel like she used it against me so she could hit me without worry. In the end she called her mom saying I was abusing her. We "solved" it but her Mother was at my house with her perfectly fine and me bruised and bloody. She then tries to clean up the blood on the walls before me. We got back together only for her to lie and cheat more and hurt me more. I had enough, I broke up with her and she tried to steal my laptop because "I have good stuff and she doesn't". I decided to let her have it even if it costed me $800. She is now telling everyone I beat her and I controlled her every action and cheated on her. I am just happy I don't have any more scars on my body from her. I still regret she was my first relationship.. I am still scared of being betrayed and it's making it hard to make relationships. I just feel like it's going to be impossible to trust again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aschmizzy Posted March 18, 2017 Report Share Posted March 18, 2017 i am so sorry. You arent alone. i have nightmares still of my last daddy screaming at me while i was in little space. Starting off online is working for me because being physically with someone can be scary after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karmababygirl Posted April 16, 2017 Report Share Posted April 16, 2017 I understand what you have been through. I started off in a M/s relationship and he made me ashamed of all the things that made me little. Only recently did I find someone who apprected those things and the "little" side of me came out, I was happier than I had been in a long time. Unfortunately that relationship didn't last and that side has faded away again. I hope someday I can feel that earth again and I hope you can too. We shouldn't be ashamed of what makes us happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KiltedDaddy Posted April 16, 2017 Report Share Posted April 16, 2017 I'm not violent but l'd like to punch that person right on the none!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KiltedDaddy Posted April 16, 2017 Report Share Posted April 16, 2017 Oops!!! Nose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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