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Does little space affect your view of having children?


Brattydaisybear
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Honestly I know to some of u im gunna sound crazy, and over obsessive but I don't care honestly because I've come to terms with how I am and how maybe I'm a little too infatuated with my daddy, but I wanted to know if anyone else felt how I do, being a little.

I don't ever ever ever ever EVER want children. For many of my own reasons, but one of them I feel like has something to do with my little space combined with my regular personality and that is I don't want children specifically for the fact that I don't want to see my Daddy give anyone else love & attention like that.

And honestly no advice will help. it's not about "oh he won't love you less if you have a baby" it's that literally the thought of another human receiving any strong love & attention from him makes me sick. I know that's harsh but it's true.

It's a lot of little factors honestly. I see how other men are with their children vs their wife. (Vice versa too). Like the thought of being out somewhere and my guy holding the child's hand all day instead of mine or giving it attention when I want to be around my him instead, like just any typical situations I've observed with how people are with their kids vs significant other would give me a lot of anxiety honestly. I'm a really attention craving person (obviously lmao) and I just know there would be so many moments where I wanna be with my daddy alone and like how we are now but the kid would just be in the way. And no advice about how "well ur the mother and being a mother is a wonderful thing and u get to raise a life and help them grow and etc etc etc" like none of that means anything to me tbh. What I want in life is to grow old with the person I love and be with them forever and nothing else in the way (that's just a personal view tho). Just wanted to see if anyone else honestly felt like this or if in general your little space affects feelings towards having children. In short, I wanna be my daddy's only thing he loves. I'm obsessive I know :/

A plus note is that my daddy knows how I am and doesn't want kids so I have nothing to worry about rn but still this is my opinion on it :p

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Honestly? Kudos to you for being so honesty and so strong in knowing what you want/need in life. If more people were like you, we would have less unwanted children.

 

There is NOTHING wrong with not wanting children, NOTHING AT ALL - for any reason. If you feel that you couldn't handle / don't want the responsibility of motherhood, DO NOT FEEL BADLY ABOUT THAT! Embrace it! Be honest to and with yourself.

 

As for your explanation with you and your Daddy - it is very common for some DDlg couples to not want children (or at the very least for a long while) because they dont want to disrupt the balance of their dynamic. And again, you know what? That is NOT selfish - it would be selfish (of others) to bring an unwanted child into that situation where they (the child) would ultimately feel that tension simply because the other people expect a couple to do so. 

 

I really do understand the attention - I've wanted children since I was a child, and that yearn is so strong that it has made me physically ill when I had to ignore it. Yet, if Daddy and I were to have a daughter, as of now, the thought of him calling her Baby Girl makes me sick, makes me angry and jealous. The thought of Daddy treating another girl more little than he may treat me, makes me feel lost. And this is coming from someone how needs children in her life. So I get it completely. And it is honestly why I may not have children, or may adopt boys. 

 

But never be sorry for being self-aware of situations that affect you and your family (Daddy). If you don't want a child, do not be sorry for that. And more importantly, never let anyone pressure you into thinking youre less, or wrong, or confused, or horrible because of it.

 

Again, I honestly applaud your stance and I sincerely wish more people would stop reproducing on the sole grounds thats what society expects of us. And instead listen to their own personal situation and base their reproductive choices off of their own relationship and point in life.

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Honestly? Kudos to you for being so honesty and so strong in knowing what you want/need in life. If more people were like you, we would have less unwanted children.

 

There is NOTHING wrong with not wanting children, NOTHING AT ALL - for any reason. If you feel that you couldn't handle / don't want the responsibility of motherhood, DO NOT FEEL BADLY ABOUT THAT! Embrace it! Be honest to and with yourself.

 

As for your explanation with you and your Daddy - it is very common for some DDlg couples to not want children (or at the very least for a long while) because they dont want to disrupt the balance of their dynamic. And again, you know what? That is NOT selfish - it would be selfish (of others) to bring an unwanted child into that situation where they (the child) would ultimately feel that tension simply because the other people expect a couple to do so. 

 

I really do understand the attention - I've wanted children since I was a child, and that yearn is so strong that it has made me physically ill when I had to ignore it. Yet, if Daddy and I were to have a daughter, as of now, the thought of him calling her Baby Girl makes me sick, makes me angry and jealous. The thought of Daddy treating another girl more little than he may treat me, makes me feel lost. And this is coming from someone how needs children in her life. So I get it completely. And it is honestly why I may not have children, or may adopt boys. 

 

But never be sorry for being self-aware of situations that affect you and your family (Daddy). If you don't want a child, do not be sorry for that. And more importantly, never let anyone pressure you into thinking youre less, or wrong, or confused, or horrible because of it.

 

Again, I honestly applaud your stance and I sincerely wish more people would stop reproducing on the sole grounds thats what society expects of us. And instead listen to their own personal situation and base their reproductive choices off of their own relationship and point in life.

omg ur way too kind thank u ^_^! Ur sooo sweet. it's really nice to see someone being supportive on this subject lol :p

And about the thought of a daughter being especially bad, im the saaaame way! it's pretty kewl knowing someone else understands the thought of just feeling lost and empty at the thought of a daughter being around. my little space would feel nonexistent almost. i just couldn't do it. im too anxiety ridden for that. anyways thanks for being so kind & supportive ^_^ hugssss

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Guest infinitecases

I have always wanted children and can't imagine a life without having them :p Having said that though, I do understand where you're coming from in terms of seeing your daddy give another girl just as much attention and love as he gives you, it can be a bit disconcerting. Since meeting daddy and having my little space.. I don't think I've ever stopped wanting children but do sometimes think about the things you've said, after all it does seem as if the attention which would be 100% yours is now divided. Despite all this, I don't think that would take away from the happiness that children would give me... seeing my daddy actually become a father and nurture our children the way he did with me is something that'll make me proud and more in love with him! 

 

At the end of the day, you are his little, his wife and the mother of his children. His relationship with you will be different to the relationship he has with his daughters and I think seeing my daddy share the experience of having our own home and family will be so much more rewarding!! I do understand everything you've said though.. children will mean less time alone with daddy, less time alone to do the things you want to do and they impede on basically every aspect of your life.. but in a way, it's a sacrifice and a compromise in return for a family and and familial love :) 

 

I sometimes do wonder how I'll be seeing my daddy with our children, or seeing daddy call them the same names he calls me but we shall have to see. As long as daddy doesn't forget to make you feel little too, I think the divide of attention is okay, he has to remember to spoil you too even with kids!! 

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Honestly, for me not wanting children isn't so much about the 'little' side of me but my actual age. I'm only nineteen, as of right now having a child is definitely not something I want and I can't really see it happening for myself in the future either. I know my current daddy agrees with me but I feel like he's kinda into the whole family-marriage-house-and-a-dog kinda thing, me? Eh. Not so much. I don't even want to get married because (in my opinion) I see it as a waste of money and time. If you're with someone and you know you want to be with someone what's the point in a piece of paper and a ring to solidify that knowledge, you know? But at the same time if other people want to get married, good for them. Just like if other people want kids, good for them. It's just something I'm not interested in. Plus, with the line of work that I want to go into I wouldn't have time to raise children properly, so it'd be irresponsible to bring that responsibility into the world on my end.

 

I also completely agree with you on the whole jealousy thing. Like 100%. That's why if I ever do have a child I hope to God that I have a son, because for me that'd be easier to deal with - I also understand boys better (grew up in a house with only boys - helped bring up my little brother) so I'm more knowledgeable on how to deal with that. But I don't know.

 

Just know that how you're feeling isn't wrong and it's not abnormal. You have every right to feel this way and don't let anybody tell you differently.

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At the end of the day, you are his little, his wife and the mother of his children. His relationship with you will be different to the relationship he has with his daughters and I think seeing my daddy share the experience of having our own home and family will be so much more rewarding!! I do understand everything you've said though.. children will mean less time alone with daddy, less time alone to do the things you want to do and they impede on basically every aspect of your life.. but in a way, it's a sacrifice and a compromise in return for a family and and familial love :)

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It's always a personal choice regardless of situation.

 

I've never wanted kids and I'm glad my Sir doesn't want kids either. I have no correlation between my not wanting kids and me being a little,truthfully bc kids annoy me(yet I'm cocky enough to think I'd raise kids better than most)but that's just how I am just like how ever you are.

Sure people always say "you'll change your mind when you have them" but I'm def not changing my mind I'll rather just have dogs.

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