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What does it mean to you to be a Daddy?


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Guest DominantBlogger

As we are all the same (Daddies) but all individual in how we've come to this role and the way in which we incorporate our dynamic, I thought it would be nice to have the Daddies speak up as to what it means to them to be a Daddy... 

 

Speak up, Daddies...  Other than the sexy times, lets hear what it means to you and how you see yourself different from your vanilla counterparts.

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The beauty of BDSM and other alternative lifestyles is in the ability to define your roles. You have 100% freedom to design your relationships based around your needs.

 

Daddies do many things, and every dynamic is different. Some give their boys and girls orgasms, or buy them things, or tease them, or give them chores and punishments, and some don't. But the universal trait of any caregiver, in my opinion, is the drive to give their boys and girls somewhere safe and warm, where they can feel good and be themselves.

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To me it's a dynamic that involves protocol and nurturing, a beneficial relationship for both sides. I've realized that I was treating my DDlg relationships more as a title and a Top/bottom reltionship than one where my little can grow both as a little and as a person. The DDlg dynamic is supposed to be more of a caring relationship than other kink related lifestyles because the dynamic is based on being parental.

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To me, being a Daddy means I am, of course, a caregiver. A protector. Someone who, through thick and thin, is there to make sure that things work out as well as they possibly can for their little. Someone who takes mind of their needs, and helps take care of them. Someone who is aware of, and listens to their problems, and helps solve them. Someone who takes note of their responsibilities, and keeps the note where they can see them! Not, however, someone who takes 100% control of all of these things, and pulls/pushes their little around. I personally feel it's best to be present, but not overbearing. How will they grow if you do everything for them?

Most of all, you're an unwavering partner. A pillar, rock, mountain, or whatever word you have for it. Someone for them to hang onto, and feel safe. I saw something on Tumblr once that summed it up quite nicely. I doubt I'll get the exact words, but it was something along the lines of:

Littles worry because they are needy, clingy, and sensitive. They worry those qualities mean they will never find a Daddy that can deal with it.
Daddies want to be needed. They want to be clung to. They want to have someone that relies on them for protection. That's what a Daddy is.

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For me, a Daddy is  almost like a superhero for a little. For me, it's about being everything that my little's actual bio-daddy never was. To provide on a physically, emotional, spiritual, financial and mental level, to protect, to nurture, to love. To be that true Master and Leader in her life. To teach, to guide. To show her that everything is going to be okay, even when in the back of my mind I know it may not be. To be coddle and cuddle and be the voice of reason when her emotions take over. To keep her on a straight path in life and occasionally spoil her senseless. To be needed, and wanted in her life as much as I need and want her in mine. Also to keep in the back of my mind that she isn't an invalid, nor a doormat and that I will always need to keep earning my place in her life just as she consistantly shows her worth in mine. 

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  • 5 years later...

Just bumping the topic by giving vague response.

 

As little I can just give vague answer to what daddy is to me. For me he is/would be for most my partner, boyfriend and friend. Someone to have bit different dynamic than with vanilla couples, meaning obviously sexual stuff but also outside bedroom things. These outside things mostly would include things like allowing me to be little and supporting that side of me, being understanding and accepting of it. Also allowing him to be daddy the way he enjoys it ( which obviously need to match with my likes, or we wouldn't be a couple XD ). For me how that happens very much depends on the daddy and how we form our dynamic. I have had very different experiences with different men, and they all have had very unique ways of being a daddy.

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This is easy because I'm entirely non-sexual with my little anyway. I like to encourage, to offer aid, to make a little feel small, tease a bit, and help them do their best. I'll ask my little if he had a healthy meal or tell him something good he should do that day. I might refer to him as being a little too small for something during casual conversation but tell him to just be careful or use a stepstool, etc. He's a bit of a klutz anyway so the tips aren't entirely for show.

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