how to handle abandonment

[mileswest]

So my mommy abandonned me a week ago and i don know what to do...basically she said i wasnt worth her time and then constantly told me she'd find another lil...i didnt believe her until she actually found one and cussed me out...i jus don know how to handle it or get over it....

[Guest AMS23]

I’ve been in the same boat with my ex daddy! He was from Glasgow and I live in the us. Not only did I put in a ton of work trying to keep him happy. Bought him gifts for Holliday’s and always was ready to play in both sexual and non Sexual ways. He still abandoned me. Right after we played over skype he hung up and told me to fuck off. Turns out he was cheating the whole time. Regardless I think it takes time to heal and it’s not something you just get over. Especially if you put in a huge amount of effort. Some people are just assholes. Girls and guys... I’d say take some time for you. Take the time to pamper yourself. Take the time to cry. And remember no matter what tomorrow is a new day! You can message me if you want to talk.

[Little Illy]

basically she said i wasnt worth her time and then constantly told me she'd find another lil...

 

i didnt believe her until she actually found one and cussed me out..

 

 

Unfortunately it sounds like you got into a relationship with a toxic or abusive woman. It doesn't sound like she actually cared for you but rather used you as a space holder until she moved on. I hate to be blunt, but it is quite obvious.

 

How do you handle this? Recognize her for what she is. She was a woman who constantly belittled you and threatened you with abandonment. Which means she mentally hurt you over and over again. It sounds like you became close to her, but I reckon she kept her distance. What can help is reflect upon the relationship and note all of the bad things she did. Why? Because then you will realize you weren't abandoned, but rather, you made a simple mistake of being with someone who isnt right for you. We all do it. But because it sounds like she was so spiteful, focusing on the bad can help you forget memories of why you care. Why you cared for her, loved her and why you miss her. 

 

I am not saying hate her or obsess over those things. But after we end a relationship we really see how the other person has been treating us. Find closure by realizing she wasn't a good person (from what you have said) and that you did nothing more than make a mistake. When we realize we didn't lose the love of our life, a strong family member or a best friend, the feeling of abandonment tends to lessen. 

[Guest Arc]

While abandonment sucks... you dodged a serious bullet there. Anyone capable to treating you like that is not worth your time and it's for the best that they are gone.

 

That kind of hurt takes time to get over, but just try to understand that you are not at fault here and you are going to be better off than if a person like that stayed. Don't let the hurt take over your life because you have already given that person more time out of your life than they deserved. Treat yourself to things that you enjoy and have some fun. Get on with things and take care of yourself. ^^

[VanillaAlpaca]

Before all else — I am deeply distressed about how harsh she was against you (｡╯︵╰｡) it's unbeliable how cruel people can be with someone they used to love... She did not have any right to be that hostile against you, even if she was looking to break up the relationship.

 

DDLG relationship dynamics tend to be quite strong most of times, so I can only imagine the feeling of being lost you have now, and the pain... (ノωヽ) I send you all my support and love , and remember to be strong even if you don't feel like that right now: the sun is going to shine again, that's for sure, but take your time healing ~

[Guest AMS23]

Have you thought about taking a vacation?

[Kirito24315]

I was in the same boat. I had a mommy for 7 months and the she up and left me cause she didnt want a wittle boy but a wittle girl instead and it just broke my heart. I just took time for myself and yes unfortunately I suppressed my little side for awhile but I went camping swimming hiking just anything to get away from it all

[Guest DuckDaddy66]

basically she said i wasnt worth her time and then constantly told me she'd find another lil

This person was never a mommy or a caretaker.  She was a cruel abusive person. A real caretaker would have even cared for you even during the breakup if needed.  So let this one go fast and take hints that demands during the relationship might be flags to get out.  As others said you dodge a bullet, me I say you have learn more about yourself and your own control.