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He is weirded out


mylittlemermaid
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last night I asked my boyfriend if he liked being called Daddy and he said I like if you like it and I said but YOU don't like it and he said it's different I'm just not used to it I guess. now I'm even more terrified to ever bring up ddlg with him :(
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Guest Miss Braid

My advice would be to give him time to get used to the idea of you calling him Daddy and see if he warms up to it over a 2-4wk period, then slowly suggest/introduce different relationship aspects that you are interested. It doesn't hurt to have a frank conversation with him.

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Just remember what I said...some daddies need an adjustment period...take your time...go slow...you don't have to rush everything at once...most importantly, Have Fun with it :)

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thanks Braid and SirDaddy I guess I'm just discouraged :( it makes me feel nervous and embarrassed and awkward and I know I can't make him like it and I don't want him to be uncomfortable. he said he's fine with it but I can tell he's not INTO it :( I just wanna be open with him
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I know how frustrating it can be when your partner says they'll do it, but they don't seem "into" it. I've had a few relationships where I told my significant other about my Ddlg side, and I asked if they would like calling me "daddy." I was met with the "if you like to be called it, then I'll call you it" response.

 

I kept trying to stress that I wanted HER to like it too, or else neither of us would be getting satisfaction. Again, I was met with the "if it makes you happy, then it makes me happy" vague response. I too was discouraged.

 

But, that doesn't mean that she (or in your case, he) will never fully indulge in it! After about a month, my girlfriend came up to me and admitted that she really was liking the idea of calling me daddy, and wanted to take it further. You just need to give "outsiders" time to adjust, learn, and open up to the Ddlg side! Don't feel discouraged :)

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I've been on both ends of this subject... the person that is not in to something AND the person that has a significant other that's not in to something. Some times you or your S.O. just aren't in to it and it can be hard to change. It looks like curious-babydoll beat me to it, but I was going to suggest maying calling him something else until he gets used to it. Part of his hesitation is due to lack of understanding or knowing where you're coming from. The imagination tends to go wild when someone doesn't explain WHY they want to do something that seems weird to them.

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Guest buddhagirl

I went through he exact same situation with my daddy. As we grew closer, he just felt like my daddy because he's protective, caring, dominant and reliable. I wanted to start calling him Daddy because it just felt right, but I felt embarrassed and nervous to ask him. I finally worked up the courage, and his reaction was to laugh a little and say, "I don't know if I'm comfortable with that". He has two young kids, so Daddy really has a strong connotation to him. I was a little discouraged, but I sent him some information about ddlg and talked to him about what I meant when I called him daddy. He said that helped and that if I wanted to call him that it would be okay. Like you, I was sad that HE didn't want it, but there was no denying what I was feeling so I started calling him Daddy. About two months after I started calling him Daddy he was totally into our dynamic and LOVED to be called Daddy. Now, he would be so sad if I stopped for any reason. So, the moral of the story is to take your time, be yourself, be brave and see what happens. He might grow to love what it means and his role as your daddy, or he might not--only one way to find out! Good luck!

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does anybody have any suggestions for when I should actually tell him about ddlg and any good links that won't freak him out too bad?
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y'all's advice and personal experience is helping me so so much thank y'all! it's so encouraging to know I'm not the only one who's dealt with this
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I just started seeing a really cute guy who I found out is absolutely DISGUSTED by girls calling guys daddy, among other kink-type things - and he has absolutely no idea I'm even into it. Super sad :(

 

But with my ex it freaked him out super super badly at first, until I sent him links and explained it to him, and he liked the dynamic a lot. Then, finally, he warmed up to the idea of me calling him daddy, and he actually ended up starting by calling himself daddy at first, before I even did. So definitely give it time! In most cases, the guy will be okay with you being into it even if they're not, and then (like from my experience) eventually they'll be into it too.

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