How to being up more ddlg things to my daddy?

[puppydaysareover]

[Raynebeau]

If that is what you enjoy then that’s what you enjoy. You should never ever have to accommodate for anyone, just because something you enjoy makes them uncomfortable. It is a reasonable request and it’s very common.. what I did was, I read into dom/ sub relationships and really enjoyed what they were about and thought my partner and I would benefit while also enjoying it. I told him about it and explained what a dom was and what a sub was. What is expected from each of them, told him I found the lifestyle very intriguing and interesting (which was the truth) then I admitted to almost obsessing over it for the last little while and just let it out. “ I want to practice dom/ sub interaction in our every day life, not just in the bedroom any more” he honestly just smiled and said yea I would actually really enjoy it.. and since it’s my interest and slowly becoming his. I do research for him, so he has a better understanding about what is not aloud for a dom and what is. Also as a sub, what my responsibilities were to him. Helping each other find him a formal dom title, if we were even in public because I can’t always be calling him daddy. Also how excited he got when I told him he can pick pet names for me, other the the usual baby girl, babe. We agreed upon mom cherie. We still learn things every day about what style we enjoy and what we are adopting from different types of sub groups in the bdsm world. At the moment we are working on remembering to use pet names while discussing new rules or when he’s telling me to do something. So I know when he’s just trying to be dominant not just an asshole.. anyways what I’m trying to say is it’s such an amazing experience to learn these things together and grow something fulfilling and enjoyable for both partners.. it’s been an amazing journey so far and we are fairly green: I’m excited to witness the happiness it brings us in the future.. so take a drive, it can possibly turn into something quite beautiful, but you’ll never know if you don’t ask:.

 

Best wishes fellow bbg,

Raynebeau

[littleone0201]

I'm having the same issue..my Daddy and I have all of these rules and punishments but they're hardly enforced. I feel as though I'm more interested in a 24/7 DD/lg lifestyle than my boyfriend, and he only engages mentally when he wants to. He calls me lots of pet names, but I do struggle to call him Daddy out of shyness which may be a problem why we don't feel like we're "in it" all the time. 

 

Anyway, the only advice I have is to just communicate! Just tell him that you would like it if he did ~this and try to work things into your relationship little by little. I overthink stuff a lot too. But if he's reassuring you that he's comfortable with it, he's probably telling the truth. 

 

Best of luck! <3

[Buckwheat_Billy]

I think you should be open and honest about how you feel. Thorough communication is something that can be challenging in almost every relationship, even in mature relationships. If you have certain desires or needs that aren't being met your partner should be open to listening to them. I would sit him down and have a serious conversation and stress what level of importance the dynamic is to you. 

 

I would also say tat listening / communicating back to you vs acting on your needs are two different things. It might be that he doesn't know what to do or feel comfortable with the dynamic. You can't blame him if that is the case and maybe showing him some resources and information might be helpful and foster discussion. Afterwards, he still might not feel comfortable in that dynamic and this is also okay as everyone is unique.

 

At the end of the day, relationships have compromises.  If this partner isn't interested in the dynamic after talking with him, can you live with that? How important is DDlg in your life and is your bond with this partner stronger than your interests to be a little? If you feel strongly about being a little and he doesn't, this partner may not be right for you. If he isn't willing to have open and honest dialogue with you or isn't willing to communicate his and your needs I highly recommend relationship counseling (if you love him) or finding someone else.  

 

Note: No one gets their way all the time in a relationship (hits compromises), but you should define for yourself what is most important for you in a partner. You should not have to compromise on the things you want most in a partner, but can on the less important features. There are other fish in the sea and if you are patient, you will catch one. 

 

Good luck!

[daddyscott87]

All relationships need trust and communication, relationship dynamics such as ours D/S, DDLG etc rely on trust and communication more than anything else. For both daddy and little we're allowing ourselves to be completely vulnerable to the other person and each totally trusting we are safe to say and do things with no recrimination - if you don't feel this is the case yet where you can open up then this is the first thing to resolve.

 

So hence i'd say the best rule to agree to is to agree to talk to each other about anything with no repercussions allowing a free atmosphere to encourage openness and honesty

 

What may be useful also is if you both discuss and agree in detail the rules that apply to each other; rules for daddy, rules for babygirl, it may help get him in the right mindset and let go of the societal views that many new practitioners hold on to (the feeling of being silly or it's all make believe rubbish etc.) it's as real as you want it to be and for many of us this is or has been a deep part of our inner self for a long time and with a little imagination things can be really fun

 

If he's set you rules that you've agreed to stick to with the understanding you will be punished otherwise, then it's reasonable and practical for him to agree to enforce those rules also. Babygirl rule: always say please when asking for something, daddy rule: if babygirl misbehaves i must punish her, also reward good behaviour. What the examples of punishments can be you're free to be creative on and you can test these boundaries and push him to ensure he does what's agreed and call him out for it if he hesitates

 

A lot of people when first being exposed to kinks from their partners will agree to try things even if they are not comfortable with them in order to please the other, if a daddy has no daddy experience it's hard for them to get into the right mindset - this is where the rules for both come into play as they can act as a bit of a guide for behaviour, rules can be changed and new ones agreed as the relationship and dynamic develops over time along with the experience gained. As a crude comparison it's a bit like dog training, eventually with the right actions in the right order the behaviour is learnt and both know what's expected