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little without a daddy


Guest ihavenodaddy

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Guest QueenJellybean

ho boy. 


ok. 


so.


i'm going to warn you in advance that you are most likely not going to like my answer. 


but, this is a public forum & you posted your story here. 


 


i don't... think anything about this situation was done in a way that can be conducive to a healthy future. 


as someone who is polyamorous, it's pretty clear that the situation with your boss/daddy (which... arguably shouldn't have happened because he's your boss...)


wasn't a healthy situation, even if your boyfriend was aware and consenting to parts of it. it doesn't sound like he was comfortable at all. furthermore, it makes sense why your boss/daddy wouldn't be willing to continue the relationship when you already had a boyfriend & the agreement was for you to have sex as long as it "didn't effect your relationship" which, it clearly still did. i'm sorry that things didn't work out with him, and i know that it hurts to see him with someone new, but you didn't leave your boyfriend for your boss -- you slept with him. 


 


as for your boyfriend, unless i'm missing something major here, it sounds like ddlg was something he was never interested in from the beginning, so it's no surprise that he's not interested in it now that you and your boss/daddy didn't work out. 


it's an unfortunate reality. 


 


to be honest, i don't... have a lot of positive advice to give you here, unfortunately.


your boyfriend doesn't sound like he has any interest in being your daddy & there's nothing you can do to change that. 


i don't suggest continuing to work at a place where your ex-daddy... who was your boss when you slept together... and is now your boss again (if i'm understanding correctly) also works, if you can help it.


& as for fulfilling your need for a partner that meets your needs, i think that the best way to do that this point would be to consider breaking up with your present partner and pursuing a transparent relationship with a caregiver. i'm not sure that opening your relationship to include another party would work with the history you have. 


 


i'm really sorry that this is probably not the advice that you wanted to hear.


everyone makes mistakes, and this sounds like a really complicated situation.


but it also sounds like a lot of feelings -- not just yours -- were probably hurt in the process, 


and the best thing to do to heal would probably not be continuing to put yourself & those you care about back into the same situations. 


including your work & personal life mixing so dramatically.


 


i really hope you find some peace soon. :heart:


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