Jump to content

  •  

  • Photo

    DDLG: Sub wont listen?


    • Please log in to reply
    19 replies to this topic

    #1 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 07:04 AM

    I have no Idea what to do. I am a Daddy Dom and My little girl Refuses to listen. We are LDR and whenever I try to punish her, she simply just ignores me or blocks me on social media. I let her know that I am very upset with her for this but she doesn't care. I have no idea what to do because none of my punishments are working. 



    #2 crazycatdaddy

    crazycatdaddy

      Nonsexual Daddy

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 119 posts
    • LocationNorthwest England

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 07:34 AM

    Have you talked to her about what punishment she finds acceptable? Punishment in a DD/LG relationship requires the consent of both partners, otherwise it doesn't make sense. You may be her daddy/dom, but she still has input into the relationship. Communicate with her as adults and equals. Discuss what you want out of the relationship, what rules you have and why, and what the punishments will be for rule-breaking. Then be quiet and listen to what she has to say about it because you may find she has a different idea or different expectations. Try to find a happy middle ground between what you want and what she wants. Even though DD/LG is a power play, the emphasis is really on the word "play" - this is something both partners do because they enjoy it, and if she's not doing what you're trying to make her do, that sounds like she's not enjoying that aspect of the relationship.

     

    If you've already discussed these things and these are punishments she's agreed to, you have to understand that for most people, DD/LG is not a 24/7 thing and if she's not in littlespace or submissive mode, she might not want to be punished or do any DD/LG activities at that time. But you won't know that unless and until you talk about it properly. Just trying to force more and more punishment and telling her you're mad that she won't do what you say is just gonna kill the relationship.


    • Littlest_Bee and CryBabyUniWolf like this

    #3 CryBabyUniWolf

    CryBabyUniWolf

      Little Girl Gamer

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 103 posts
    • LocationOklahoma

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 08:38 AM

    You need to discuss what you both want in the relationship, and like crazycatdaddy said, you need to agree on the punishments. If you cannot find a middle ground though, and you realize that this is not the relationship you want, you may need to end things and move on.
    I hope you two can come to an agreement and that it will work out.

    I wish you both the best.
    • Littlest_Bee likes this

    *glitter* CryBabUniWolf  *glitter* 


    #4 ~*~Sachita~*~

    ~*~Sachita~*~

      Courtship Etiquette Enforcer

    • Moderator
    • 625 posts
    • LocationCalifornia

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 11:44 AM

    You are in a relationship with someone who blocks you on social media?  Wow, I feel so old because I did not realize this was a thing that happened.


    • TwilightSparklez and BlueEyedDaddy like this

    #5 LittleSnowiii

    LittleSnowiii

      Advanced Member

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 174 posts
    • LocationPortugal

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 12:38 PM

    I have no Idea what to do. I am a Daddy Dom and My little girl Refuses to listen. We are LDR and whenever I try to punish her, she simply just ignores me or blocks me on social media. I let her know that I am very upset with her for this but she doesn't care. I have no idea what to do because none of my punishments are working. 

    Like other people said, it might be that she isn't confortable with certain punishments (or punishments in general). Or it might be she thinks all you want is the sexual part of ddlg and she might want more?

     

    If you guys have an honest and straight forward talk I'm sure stuff will be fixed. However I'll say I don't get the blocking part. Blocking after a long and persistent event, I understand. But randomly blocking and unblocking is rather confusing. Communication is key.


    • CryBabyUniWolf likes this

    Snowiii. 24. Portugal.

    Petite potato. Introvert.

    Spoiled princess and taken by the best daddy ever.

     

    anime-phone.gif


    #6 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 03:20 PM

    I have tried to have a conversation with her many times but whenever I do she acts like she doesnt care and tells me that nothing is wrong with my rules. I am always sending her things that she wanted and buying her stuff. Our Relationship is sexual but not ALWAYS constantly sexual. Its only sexual when she is in the mood for it. If she isnt them I wont make it sexual. 

     

    Like other people said, it might be that she isn't confortable with certain punishments (or punishments in general). Or it might be she thinks all you want is the sexual part of ddlg and she might want more?

     

    If you guys have an honest and straight forward talk I'm sure stuff will be fixed. However I'll say I don't get the blocking part. Blocking after a long and persistent event, I understand. But randomly blocking and unblocking is rather confusing. Communication is key.


    Edited by DxddyMax, 24 March 2019 - 03:28 PM.


    #7 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 03:39 PM

    Exhibit A. (O-O) Is My Sub. I am Ki/xty <3

     

      Ki/xty <3Today at 5:42 PM

    Why werent you replying.
     
    2. (She called someone BB on Msp.)
     
    3.(She cursed.)
     
    (ʘ‿ʘ)Today at 5:43 PM
    **yawn
     
    Ki/xty <3Today at 5:43 PM
    Why werent you replying.
     
    (ʘ‿ʘ)Today at 5:43 PM
    r u done
     
    Ki/xty <3Today at 5:43 PM
    Why Werent you replying.
    Hm?
     
    (Then she stops replying.)
    So I spam. Then she blocks me. 
    This happens. Every. Single. Time. 
    But when its a reward. She takes the reward. 


    #8 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 03:40 PM

    For anyone else talking about my rules. I have sat down multiple times and asked her about my rules and she agreed and said there was no issue with them. 



    #9 LittleCelticLass

    LittleCelticLass

      Princess of Snuggles/Sharpie Queen

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 323 posts
    • LocationColorado

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 04:22 PM

    It seems to me she's not interested in actually having a relationship. Maybe it's time to cut your losses and move on.
    • BlueEyedDaddy likes this

    #10 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 04:26 PM

    She has even cheated on me with other daddies and even with other littles. 

     

    It seems to me she's not interested in actually having a relationship. Maybe it's time to cut your losses and move on.



    #11 Aetherr

    Aetherr

      Local Scottish.

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 399 posts
    • LocationFife, Scotland

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 04:43 PM

    i dont think she actually wants to be a real sub or is in denial about what she wants, have a heart to heart conversation with her about how this is not working for you and you need it to work for both parties or you are going to put a stop to it and move on from her,

     

    this is not a ddlg or d/s issue its a relationship issue, either she does not respect you or does not love you... likely both but yeah

     

    put your foot down m8



    #12 CryBabyUniWolf

    CryBabyUniWolf

      Little Girl Gamer

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 103 posts
    • LocationOklahoma

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 05:13 PM

    She's just takes rewards and gifts?
    She almost sounds like she doesn't want a Daddy Dom, sounds to me like she just wants a sugar daddy.
    And she has cheated on you several times?
    You don't sound happy with her.. at all.

    It honestly just sounds like you should cut all ties with her.

    And the blocking part? That just seems so immature, she may be a little, but she is still an adult. I think it's time you just move on, honestly.

    It sounds like you have tried your best to help the relationship, but all parties have to try in a relationship.

    You do not deserve to be used. Not only does it sound like she is using you, it sounds like she discards you when she isn't getting what she wants, or she has used you for what she wants for the day.

    Do what makes you happy. Make sure you are taking care of yourself.

    *glitter* CryBabUniWolf  *glitter* 


    #13 Little kaiya

    Little kaiya

      Daddy Wolf's little pink champagne fox

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 229 posts
    • LocationCanada

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 05:16 PM

    Honestly it sounds like she's just using you. I'd suggest stop sending her things. A relationship should be based on mutual respect and love not gift giving.

    Little kaiya
    Little kaiya 💖🦊💖

    #14 Alaskan Daddy

    Alaskan Daddy

      Alaskan Daddy For Long Distance Little

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 85 posts
    • Locationalaska

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 05:37 PM

    To me it sounds like she is using you and does not respect you. I can't see anything changing with her. It seems she is making the relationship about her wants and desires. It does not seem like it is 2-way. Ultimately it is up to you, but try to be selfish and see if your needs are being satisfied. If they are not then she may not be a good match for you. I think you have received some good information from the people here. Read all the information presented here by you and all the other people. When you have done that you will know in your heart what you need to do.

    I hope this helps.



    #15 bigchocolatedaddy

    bigchocolatedaddy

      Daddy with Experience

    • Members
    • PipPip
    • 27 posts
    • LocationNY

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 07:15 PM

    Throw the whole bitch away and move on.You deserve more. As blunt as that is, that's the best way to go about this.


    • LittleCelticLass and Aetherr like this

    Daddy-San


    #16 Siniwit

    Siniwit

      In the kitchen, wrist-twistin' like a stir fry

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 66 posts
    • LocationUnsure if still in the European Union or not; Unsure when I'll know.

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 10:06 PM

    This isn't a relationship. It's BS. Toxic. Get out. Leave. Move on. I've been there and I never want to go back. Don't put yourself in those same shoes. They're not comfortable.


    • BlueEyedDaddy likes this

    That's the way it is... That's the way it is...
    rdr2wp-sig.png
    Shine light into darkness... Shine light into darkness...


    #17 PrincessAurora

    PrincessAurora

      Brat Princess/Site Cosmetologist

    • Members
    • PipPipPip
    • 62 posts
    • LocationSan Diego, ca

    Posted 24 March 2019 - 11:33 PM

    So just from that example of a conversation. you need to dump her. 
    she's as you stated, cheated on you with other daddies and littles, notice how you said multiples of each.
    she only interacts with you if your giving her something.

     

    she's using you as a sugardaddy. 


    • CryBabyUniWolf likes this
    cosplayer, hair stylist, gamer, nerd

    #18 Potassium

    Potassium

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 4 posts
    • LocationUK - Yorkshire

    Posted 25 March 2019 - 07:03 AM

    Mate, shes abusing you.

     

    You should have cut your losses a long time ago.


    • CryBabyUniWolf likes this

    #19 DxddyMax

    DxddyMax

      Newbie

    • Members
    • Pip
    • 7 posts

    Posted 14 June 2019 - 12:14 AM

    So I kept it going, and just the other day I did that whole "Be selfish and see what she does" And she called me self-centered. Now when I try to punish her, she Yawns and says "Im getting used to this by now ya know." 

    Now, this time (Shes New Comb, im Get on your kne/es) 

     

    NeW cOmBToday at 1:14 AM
    like I just wanna do nothing
     
    Get on your Kn/eesToday at 1:14 AM
    Noope that’s not allowed
    -tickles u more
    Neverrr
    Not happening
    -tickles u a lot, pinning u down
    Babbyyy
    Where did u go?
     
    NeW cOmBToday at 1:17 AM
    no
     
    Get on your Kn/eesToday at 1:18 AM
    Where did you go?
    Hm?
    Baaby
    Where did you go?
    Baby.
    Don’t ignore me.
     
    NeW cOmBToday at   1:20 AM
    im not
    ok
     
    Get on your Kn/ees
    1:20 AM
    Then where did you go.
    Answer me baby.
    ?
    Hm?
    Words. Now.
     
    NeW cOmB at   1:23 AM
    no
     
    As you can see, I was in a good mood and I was messing around with her, we were on call for a bit, after she said no she instantly hung up and went offline and it is now 2:13. my issue is now she is on a 1 hour flight, and I don't exactly trust planes, so its just the anxiety, and the fact that she couldnt even accept her punishment, So I have a punishment planned for when she gets back. I mean I feel bad for her because her mothers in a coma and shes going through some stuff but she wont let me help and I dont tell her my feelings like I used to because Shes just so much more important to me..


    #20 Little_Butterfly

    Little_Butterfly

      Member

    • Members
    • PipPip
    • 22 posts
    • LocationNSW Australia

    Posted 14 June 2019 - 12:26 AM

    No matter what the relationship, that behaviour is just plain rude to anyone, let alone your DaddyDom. There is no way I would behave like that to even just a friend. If she has a problem with something, including punishment, she needs to talk to you about it.
    There are plenty of littles who would love a Daddy who makes such an effort.




    1 user(s) are reading this topic

    1 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users


      baby_kitten030