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Rant/Venting.


CryBabyUniWolf
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God. I have so much on my mind right now. Way more then I'm adding on here.

 

I need a job. I need a fucking job, I know I do. I can't tell why I can't get myself to get one. Too lazy? To scared? I've been taken care of all my life so maybe I just want that to continue?

 

I've also just been so lonely. I feel like I have no one. I have my fam. I live with them.. but... I dunno.

I'm so introverted and I have social anxiety. I can't seem to get anyone on here to talk to me to build a lasting friendship. So I haven't found anyone I click with yet.

Really just want to feel loved and be cuddled.

 

I'm really into women but no mommy Dom's talk to me....

 

And I don't know.

 

I'm so depressed. I take my medicine. I try to think positive.

 

But I'm hurting...

 

And I just want this shit to end.

Edited by BabyGirlElfy
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Guest crazycatdaddy

How about a work-from-home type job? More and more companies are offering telecommuting nowadays, and if you have issues with social anxiety, working from home can be a great way to make money without having to spend too much time people-ing. Anxiety can be incredibly draining and that can really put a downer on how you feel about looking for work, so if you could find something to do from home it might be a good way to get started. ModSquad and Chat Shop are two companies I know of that are often looking for recruits but you can probably find more. There's also freelance work if you think that could be an option. The advantage of working freelance is you can set your own hours and choose what projects you take on. Even if neither of those options are right, there's more to "getting a job" than a traditional 9-5 or working in a fast food joint! Hopefully you'll be able to find something less intimidating that you can do, and do well.

 

When it comes to finding a partner, the thing to keep in mind is that it can take time. I'm not sure how long you've been looking, but CG/L is a small community and while I have no doubt that your future partner is out there, you're unlikely to find them overnight. Do you have a personal ad, either here or on another site like Datecgl? Making sure people know you're out there and looking for someone is important. That way, even if you're not online someone can still find your post and decide to get in touch. I think the other thing worth saying is that a partner isn't a magical cure for anything. It can be a great feeling to be with someone, and to have someone to support you through everything going on, that's true, and there are times when having someone to be with can lift your mood for a time. But if there are underlying issues keeping you from being happy, a partner won't necessarily fix that. And if you make the mistake of rushing in and jumping on the first person who comes along, they could very well be wrong for you and that could leave you feeling worse in the long run, so please be careful.

 

Mental health is difficult and it's complicated. I have a complicated condition (or set of conditions) myself so I can sympathise, believe me. Taking the medication is great, assuming it's the right one for you. If it's not working, talk to your doctor or nurse and see if you can try something else. They say medication alone isn't a fix though, so are you doing some kind of therapy or do you have a professional you can talk to? I see someone every week and even though sometimes I dread the appointments I think they're helpful overall.

 

Anything I could say like "it's going to be alright" or "stick with it" is going to sound hollow, and I get that. But if you're feeling alone and you'd like someone to talk to, you're very welcome to send me a message. I really hope things get better for you soon.

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BabyGirlElfy, in addition to what Nonsexual Daddy has suggested, here's my two cents worth: 
 

Regardless of your situation, try taking baby steps in resolving your issues, one step at a time, easiest one to start with.

Life really sucks at times, however trust me there's always a way out.

 

Try placing free online ads (Craig's List etc.) for providing services that you're good at, from gardening / landscaping to assisting seniors with shopping, taking care of pets, anything that you're good at or passionate about. Research and beat prices of others who are offering similar services. 
 

I promise you that your current situation will not last and will change for the better sooner than you think.

Don't blame yourself for any of this. 
 

Finally, please think positive, you're just as special and beautiful as anyone else regardless of your looks of shape. Start loving yourself and others will follow. 

You're welcome to talk to me or reach out to others, I know many will be more than happy to help motivate you. 

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How about a work-from-home type job? More and more companies are offering telecommuting nowadays, and if you have issues with social anxiety, working from home can be a great way to make money without having to spend too much time people-ing. Anxiety can be incredibly draining and that can really put a downer on how you feel about looking for work, so if you could find something to do from home it might be a good way to get started. ModSquad and Chat Shop are two companies I know of that are often looking for recruits but you can probably find more. There's also freelance work if you think that could be an option. The advantage of working freelance is you can set your own hours and choose what projects you take on. Even if neither of those options are right, there's more to "getting a job" than a traditional 9-5 or working in a fast food joint! Hopefully you'll be able to find something less intimidating that you can do, and do well.

 

When it comes to finding a partner, the thing to keep in mind is that it can take time. I'm not sure how long you've been looking, but CG/L is a small community and while I have no doubt that your future partner is out there, you're unlikely to find them overnight. Do you have a personal ad, either here or on another site like Datecgl? Making sure people know you're out there and looking for someone is important. That way, even if you're not online someone can still find your post and decide to get in touch. I think the other thing worth saying is that a partner isn't a magical cure for anything. It can be a great feeling to be with someone, and to have someone to support you through everything going on, that's true, and there are times when having someone to be with can lift your mood for a time. But if there are underlying issues keeping you from being happy, a partner won't necessarily fix that. And if you make the mistake of rushing in and jumping on the first person who comes along, they could very well be wrong for you and that could leave you feeling worse in the long run, so please be careful.

 

Mental health is difficult and it's complicated. I have a complicated condition (or set of conditions) myself so I can sympathise, believe me. Taking the medication is great, assuming it's the right one for you. If it's not working, talk to your doctor or nurse and see if you can try something else. They say medication alone isn't a fix though, so are you doing some kind of therapy or do you have a professional you can talk to? I see someone every week and even though sometimes I dread the appointments I think they're helpful overall.

 

Anything I could say like "it's going to be alright" or "stick with it" is going to sound hollow, and I get that. But if you're feeling alone and you'd like someone to talk to, you're very welcome to send me a message. I really hope things get better for you soon.

 

Thank you. I know having a partner won't fix everything. I'm being patient. Just gets hard feeling lonely. Had been doing pretty good. Just... One of those times.

 

I have seen therapists for most of my life. I'm pretty drained of them.

 

Thank you for your reply.

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BabyGirlElfy, in addition to what Nonsexual Daddy has suggested, here's my two cents worth: 

 

Regardless of your situation, try taking baby steps in resolving your issues, one step at a time, easiest one to start with.

Life really sucks at times, however trust me there's always a way out.

 

Try placing free online ads (Craig's List etc.) for providing services that you're good at, from gardening / landscaping to assisting seniors with shopping, taking care of pets, anything that you're good at or passionate about. Research and beat prices of others who are offering similar services. 

 

I promise you that your current situation will not last and will change for the better sooner than you think.

Don't blame yourself for any of this. 

 

Finally, please think positive, you're just as special and beautiful as anyone else regardless of your looks of shape. Start loving yourself and others will follow. 

You're welcome to talk to me or reach out to others, I know many will be more than happy to help motivate you. 

Thank you very much. You can send people my way if you'd like xP

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CrazyCatDaddy and MasterPhotog gave good advice, so I won't repeat what they said, but I'm sorry about the friend thing. I've talked to you a few times, but I'm really bad with online friendships because I don't communicate. :rolleyes: I've added loads of people to my friend list here but I really barely message anyone. I just make comments and reply to statuses.

 

I also completely understand about the job thing. I'm older than you but also have an issue with getting a job. I just won't apply to things. I tell myself if I become financially independent then I can find somebody I actually want to take care of me rather than my parents (who are wonderfully letting me still live with them).

 

You're not alone and we all encounter rough patches in our lives. :)

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