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Starting to lose hope in finding a daddy


ItsMeowmeowz
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I'm not sure if this topic belongs here. But yeah...I have been trying to find a daddy but it hasn't been unsuccessful because I find it difficult to connect with people, which leads me to be extremely picky. I am not sure if I should just give up hope... I feel like it's even more difficult because I do not fit the mould of a "typical little". Sorry if this post should not be here.
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Guest DollyGirly

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being picky. It isn't good for you or the other person for anyone to "settle". You both deserve better than that.

 

As for whether or not you keep looking, that's up to you. Maybe take a break from your search and just focus on yourself. Maybe date people who aren't into this kink for awhile just to have fun as adult you.

 

I know for a fact that littles don't NEED a Daddy/Mommy/Caregiver to be a little. We can learn to self sooth and indulge little us ourselves. 

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I'm not sure if this topic belongs here. But yeah...I have been trying to find a daddy but it hasn't been unsuccessful because I find it difficult to connect with people, which leads me to be extremely picky. I am not sure if I should just give up hope... I feel like it's even more difficult because I do not fit the mould of a "typical little". Sorry if this post should not be here.

 

Here let me give you the highlights of what everyone will tell you:

 

1. Just be patient, the perfect daddy is out there for you!

2. There is nothing wrong with being picky!

3. Never give up hope!

4. There is no 'typical' little - you are perfectly little no matter what.

5. Good luck!

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Guest Ttul

There are all kinds of littles and all kinds of daddies. You just have to be patient.

I go by Satan and papi Chulo. If I can find a daddy there is definitely a daddy out there for you.

There is nothing wrong with having standards.

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Hi ItsMeowmeowz,

I hope I'm not overstepping with what I'm going to say but since you said you have trouble connecting to people in general, I'd suggest you work on that and not just here online but in real life. Even though it's hard to do.

 

Get out, do things that make you happy and build up some real friendships. Those kinds of connections are important for when you have to deal with sucky stuff in the rest of your life (and dating can lead to a bunch of sucky situations before it leads to a happy relationship).

 

If there are obstacles you can't overcome on your own, seek professional help (e.g. from a therapist). I know me saying that sounds easier than it is in reality but it's worth the effort it takes.

 

Try to find a way to be happy in life even if you may not find a partner.

If you want to have healthy relationships, it's pretty important that your relationship isn't what defines you and that it isn't the only thing in your life that makes you happy.

Find your own way.

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I'm not sure if this topic belongs here. But yeah...I have been trying to find a daddy but it hasn't been unsuccessful because I find it difficult to connect with people, which leads me to be extremely picky. I am not sure if I should just give up hope... I feel like it's even more difficult because I do not fit the mould of a "typical little". Sorry if this post should not be here.

Let's start with perhaps the easier of the two issues, what is a "typical little"? Leaving aside the whole "there is no such thing" part of that conversation let's go to what may be more useful. If I understand what you're actually getting at you seem to be suggesting you have some "atypical" traits that you think may be turning off potential partners. If that's correct it's very hard to offer advice or points for consideration when you dont actually share what traits or behaviors you mean. You may get more targeted and meaningful advice if you are more specific.

 

Second, being picky isnt really a bad thing. Seeking comparability is actually far better than just jumping on the first relationship possibility that comes along. Being unable to connect with people though could be a much bigger issue as at the heart of things that's what a relationship is, a deep abiding connection to another person.

 

You haven't really offered a lot of information but you may not be ready for a relationship yet. Finding out why you have problems connecting with people, I'm assuming you may not be sure of the reason, could be far more valuable than putting all your efforts into trying to find a relationship.

 

Keep in mind, just because you feel a Ddlg relationship may not be for you right now doesn't mean that cant change in the future. Perhaps doing some internal searching may be more productive than an external search. Getting into a relationship if you arent ready isnt fair to the other person or you.

 

Little kaiya

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Here let me give you the highlights of what everyone will tell you:

 

1. Just be patient, the perfect daddy is out there for you!

2. There is nothing wrong with being picky!

3. Never give up hope!

4. There is no 'typical' little - you are perfectly little no matter what.

5. Good luck!

 

SamL's comment made me crack up, so I hope I will be forgiven the following:

 

1. you are 19, means you have not been in dating world and world of bdsm for long ( I hope ). Maybe focus your own life and make it magical even without someone else? Meeting someone you can really fall for doesn't happen every second ( or then being bit more picky might be a good idea + seeing a shrink would be advisable ).

 

2. it's good to be bit picky but I also would consider that are you being too picky? And are you picky in the right matters? Are you giving people fair chance to really connect with you? Sometimes what we want is not what we need, and it is true also with our choice of partner: sometimes something else than what we were thinking might be the thing for us. One should consider if their "want" -list is realistic for people are just people, not super heros. And also consider what you have to offer to attract the kind of person you wish to meet.

 

3. YES! Giving up hope is like..... giving up life and all pleasures in it, imo. But instead of hoping for prince charming to appear, have hope for ( better ) future, that you will learn, be kind and happy. Have hope that you will find your own path in life even every once in while the path seems lost anyhow.

 

4. Well, the stereotypes exists. But everyone is different and the more you get to know to people, the more you will realise that people are more or even more far from the stereotype. When it comes to dating, we anyhow are looking for a PERSON, not a role someone fills up ( I hope ). So I wouldn't take much into consideration if one doesn't seem like the norm ( thou if you are really niche thing with not that huge dating pool because of x,y,z.... well, statisticly it will be harder to find anyone even somewhat matching ).

 

5. Yea well.... sort of? Finding a mate requires luck ( so you meet and hopefully also in good circumstances ) but it also requires work: it requires dates, meeting people, talking to people...... It's rare if not impossible to be so lucky that perfect person for you stumbles to you randomly and you are happy ever after.

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Haven't read above comments..

I'm sorry to hear that. You have to stay strong or maybe take a little break, maybe this isn't the right time for you to have a daddy. 

Sometimes if you looking for someone it won't happen. Just give it time. 

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Great advice from everyone, I'm glad and proud that this community is there for someone who is down. 
I hope that you take time to read all comments and think of what's best and most suitable for you. 
Keep in mind that here you're among friends. Best of luck. 

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I’ve never really been a little. I don’t know how I really want to though. I tried to find a daddy to care for me but all they want is nudes. Even though I know they’re not real daddies, I want attention. It’s just hard for me and now I’m babbling on and on...sorry
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