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How to fall back into little space?


Kitten&Spice
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When I first joined the community at 17 I was extremely enthusiastic and enjoyed every moment of being little! I was on kik often and was active in several groups along the way.

 

However as time went on I found myself attempting to help littles who were struggling and also finding matches for them. It was more common for me to encourage other littles as well as playing the role of a caregiver. Which was not at all what I signed up for.

 

I thought that if I changed in there long enough I would find a caregiver or daddy that would see my efforts and help me out. That I could be open and be able to break the ice. However 3 years of search became to hard for me to handle.

 

I dropped out of every single ddlg chatroom and shut down on communication with those I had became friends with. I want to help them but I also have issues of my own that has only made things worse over the 3 years.

 

I feel lost and want to love this community again but I know it will result in the same way. I want to be in my little space but I find it hard to regress without worry of being a burden or simply being found as stupid.

 

I would love advice but right now I just need to vent. I don't want pity or anything just want to know if any other littles on here has felt the same way. And how they overcame that struggle?

 

I am working on bettering myself and many stressors I had concealed for years has resurfaced over the past few weeks. I am going to the gym to help out and got a job. So I am trying to get better. I am also attending counseling and have a therapist. So no worries on my end. I am just stuck on rather joining this community was the right idea or not.

 

Thank you.

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oh man, I feel the same way about being little, my biggest piece of advice is that you can be little without the community, like you don;t have to post anything on here unless you just wanna, but you don't have to be part of a chatroom or groupchat to be a little

 

the other piece of advice I have is that you're not in charge of making someone else happy, the only person you need to make happy is you

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I'm the same way. I'm the kind of person that constantly wants to help make people happy, even when I myself am not. I've started to learn some people don't actually want help... They just... I dunno. Take advantage? I don't know how to explain it.

 

You don't need to feel guilty about not wanting to be around negative people with negative energy.

 

Do what you want to do. You don't have to be on this site to be a little. If you want to be on here, Kool, if you don't, Kool. It sounds like you need to focus on yourself and your own happiness.

 

If you DO want to be on this site, I suggest looking for people with similar interests, get to know people, find people who are good for you instead of people that will drag you down.

 

It's not selfish to want to be happy, love.

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Sometimes it's hard to allow ourselves to use our energy to make sure our own needs are met - because none of us wants to be seen as selfish.

At the same time taking care of ourselves is absolutely necessary.

 

I feel for you and the struggle you have. Be mindful of your own needs and I think being inside the community could turn out good for you this time around.

 

Take care. ☀️

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I am in your boat. For me I give and give until I am absolutely empty. My therapist has been key in learning to take time for myself and understanding my little side, mind you I got so darn lucky finding someone who understands little's. I still make mistakes and forget about myself and find myself caring for others and neglecting myself, I have learned to recognize it faster and not beat myself up for failing to know better. Just take it one step at a time, be little by yourself even the small things like watching a movie, and my biggest lesson and one I am still working on is it's okay to tell someone that you can't help them right now you need space for yourself.

 

I suppose overall what I am saying is I feel and understand you. Try to remember you are the most important thing to yourself. And lastly if you feel like singing in the rain wearing a pink tutu then do it. Sending you warm wishes.

 

Take care  :heart:  *glitter*  :heart:  *glitter*  :heart:

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Thank you all for the advice! It's ashame that you guys feel the same way and I have noticed many littles can relate. I enjoy talking to others I just find it difficult when I am texting or simply on my phone for to long. Especially since I have a dog who gets jealous! I just wish I had people in my area that shared the same interests! Mainly so I can get more; I dont know how to say it, physical communication?

 

I just wish there was more respectful caregivers out there. One's that just want you for you and not for your body or sex. It's just a lot and I have no idea how to go about fixing things. But you are all right. I need to work on my self worth and learning that I should fix myself. Thank you

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