Am I still a Little if I like/don't like certain things?
Posted 08 October 2019 - 03:13 PM
I'm not particularly into age regression, and I'm not a big fan of the thought of someone having TOTAL control over me and me having no say in anything. And I'm not entirely into having a Littlespace and find it hard to get into one.
But what I DO like is the structure in a DDLG relationship; morning/nighttime routines, having charts and schedules to help me remember to do things (the thought of getting stickers for that kind of thing is cute, too!), being nurtured and cared for and looked-out for by a nurturing and loving and caring Daddy (I love the thought of being told things in an authoritative Daddy voice, or having my hand held in public, etc.). I need that kind of structure that comes from a DDLG relationship.
So, finally, my question: Am I still a Little, technically?
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Posted 08 October 2019 - 03:40 PM
In my opinion yes. Not all littles age regress (this is related somewhat to little space aswell), first of all. Same applies to submission (some only like it in certain ammounts, others only in bed, etc etc). Every little is different, and you're no less of a little for that.
Again this is all my opinion, but DDLG can be very diverse. I would say if you have some child-like characteristics about yourself (like a silly side, maybe a love for stuffies or something, being playful, etc) you already are a little in a way. Plus the fact you said you enjoy the authoritative part of a daddy.
Edited by Littledreamer95, 08 October 2019 - 03:41 PM.
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Posted 08 October 2019 - 03:44 PM
Short answer is yes. If you feel you are a little then you are.
We don't need to enjoy or need the same things and these roles are not one size fits all.
Posted 08 October 2019 - 03:50 PM
There are many littles that question themselves, but it all comes down to how you identify yourself.
If you feel like a little, then congrats, you are one! We are all unique and different, some enjoy things that others don't.
It doesn't invalidate your little persona if you want to have a say and decide some things for yourself,
many littles want to be independent on certain things.
It's okay if you don't age regress and you don't have to define or force a little space.
This is all just speculation but maybe you are in your little space all the time, and that's just a part of you,
so you find it hard to notice any difference in your behaviour.
You're your own kind of little, just keep doing the things that make you happy and
don't worry about how others might define you, because it's really all up to you.
Edited by Acenya, 08 October 2019 - 03:51 PM.
Unowned brat | 19
Middle | 10-12
Posted 08 October 2019 - 03:52 PM
Posted 08 October 2019 - 04:52 PM
One thing you'll notice with all BDSM and DDLG relationships is that everyone prefers to go about it in slightly different ways. I've never seen two that are exactly alike, and even the same person will have slightly different relationships with different people. The usefulness in communicating that you're a "little" is to give potential friends and counterparts a rough idea of what you're interested in. But in the end it's like "gaming" or "watching TV shows". Two people who share those hobbies might enjoy completely different games and shows. Neither is ever invalidated, however.
You still have plenty of elements that are commonly associated with DDLG that you enjoy. I think one of the main parts differentiating it from regular D/s is that it's generally a more nurturing and rule-based relationship, which are still big things for you. So yeah, you're a little. Although maybe I'm just biased because my preferences in a little (lack of age regression, no TOTAL control) are extremely similar to what you offer, so if people would decide that you're not really a little, then that would mean I have no business looking for one
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Posted 08 October 2019 - 05:50 PM
The short answer is 'Yes'.
There is no criteria set in stone to adhere to, to define you as being 'little'.
You are you. All littles (and non-littles too) are individuals.
You may share some commonalities with others. Mostly likely so.
But you will also have your own uniqueness, your own likes, and your own interests.
Don't worry about checking off a list. Just be yourself
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Posted 08 October 2019 - 06:14 PM
All littles are different and want different things. I don't want to be completely controlled by a caregiver. I don't consider myself particularly kinky either, at least compared to a lot of people on here. I don't want a lot of rules, just a caregiver who loves me and wants me to be the best I can be and supports me. Being little is part of my personality and I want someone who understands and loves me more for it.
In fact, you don't even have to want a daddy or mommy to be a little. Littles can be littles all by themselves! And even in a relationship with a caregiver, there can be different levels of d/s. It can range from none at all to complete TPE (total power exchange) and everything in between. Sometimes the little is the dominant one. Your relationship is what you make it!
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Big age: 29
Little age: 5-7
Children don't worry what they look like to others. They are 100% themselves. When we get older, we learn to fit in society by submerging those parts of ourselves that our culture looks down on. We don't want to be rejected by our parents. We don't want to be rejected by our peers. Growing up may include re-embracing ourselves even if we must stand alone.
Thank you for being here as I re-embrace the Self I'm meant to be.
(Note: I'm not looking for a caregiver right now. Please don't ask.)
Posted 08 October 2019 - 07:35 PM
Definitely yes, because you don't need *stuff* to be Little. That's like saying that the accoutrements are more important than the feelings associated. Also, and this is just me, but I'm not about to let anyone tell me how I feel about myself. I suppose I could decide one day that I should put away this stuff (I'm older, so the little thing gets judged harder by people who don't understand), but honestly, it's none of their concern. If my CG is happy with me little, and I'm happy with me little, then dagnabbit, I'm gonna be little.
So...I think that if you're happy, then you don't need to wonder or worry about comparing yourself to the little 'ideal.' Just be yourself. Be the little you wanna be.
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Posted 08 October 2019 - 10:41 PM
Yes! Every little is different, wants/needs different things and gets something different out of it! If you wish to identify as a little you are a little
Posted 08 October 2019 - 10:53 PM
if you want to be a little then you are a little!
dont let anyone tell you otherwise, everyone has their own definitions and ideas that doesent mean you are wrong
Posted 09 October 2019 - 02:30 AM
I think that DDLG is built on the need to give and want structure. The structure/guidance can be given in whatever style the receiver wants. Some littles need more baby love, others need love at different ages/stages in life. We can all differ in how love is perceived. Some feel their needs meet by having their CG in total control, that they be punished or fussed at, a stern voice is used or complete understanding, love and cuddles be given. The point is that you have a general need to be meet.
* Side note: also don't let any one throw you into a tail spin on wether you're a little or a middle based on what you like and need. Come to that conclusion yourself.
Posted 09 October 2019 - 05:29 AM
Hi Kitten! As the others have already said, yes, you are a little. In fact, it sounds like you're little in a similar way to me.
I identify more as a middle than a little because I don't age regress, I don't go into littlespace and I'm not into many of the things that littles seem to enjoy. My daddy doesn't have total control over me and we don't go in for punishments and that side of ddlg. My daddy does help me with routine and he's really good at guiding me and encouraging me! Sometimes I get the "daddy voice" and he always holds my hand.
The important thing to remember about ddlg is that you get to make it whatever you need it to be. Finding the right partner, the right daddy, is what's important because the right person will be able to give you the care that you need in the way that works best for you.
Posted 09 October 2019 - 07:15 PM
I feel the same! You have no idea how good it feels to have someone else like me lol
I'd say we're still littles, we just express it differently
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21 y/o / middle (12-15) / female / in a relationship
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