Holidays are my worst enemy

[PowerPuffPrincess]

It wasn’t always like this. After I experienced a personal loss of life in my family last year, I’ve been feeling so indifferent about the holiday season. 
 

I’ve been placing more emphasis on taking care of yourself but I realize that I harbor so much resentment for innocent people enjoying their holiday. I know it’s a normal reaction but it scares me how much I hate seeing other peoples joy. The world continues to spin no matter what.

And, before I lost my brother, I realized that I was having the “best days of my life” while others resented me for it. They probably hated that I could feel joy and not have a care in the world. Now, I understand and it saddens me how I’ve joined the club. 
 

If anyone is experiencing this type of pain, you’re not alone. It’s okay to be upset and it’s completely understandable and valid . Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Your grief and pain will not be dictated by others who’ve never waked down your path. If you need to speak or vent, anyone, my inbox is open. 🫂

Edited February 14, 2024 by PowerPuffPrincess

[beanbean]

They can be hard times for sure but it can always change back as well and be good times again life always is made up of peaks and valleys here hoping you find your peak again 

[PowerPuffPrincess]

5 hours ago, beanbean said:

They can be hard times for sure but it can always change back as well and be good times again life always is made up of peaks and valleys here hoping you find your peak again 

I hope I do. For now, I’m content with the resting at the bottom of a dark and quiet valley. One day, I will hike up to find a peak once more. 

[ErickWcurls]

I feel some jealousy when I see a happy couple, I am glad for them and want this so desperately for myself I've never felt hatred for seeing other people's joy.  Comparison is the thief of joy.

When I had a gf I was very grateful and tried to show her how much I appreciated and loved her.  She gave me stress and punishment for all this. 

 

I understand feeling ambivalence and annoyance with the holidays, especially when single and heartbroken. 

The idea is to practice gratitude for what one has and aspire and work towards the things you want to change, improve and goals to achieve

 

 

Hugs