Struggles with change and processing things

[BabyBri420]

Does anyone else feel like change is the end of the world? Like nothing could be okay again and memories will never release their death grip on your heart, especially when it's really really sudden

If I can talk about things it's a bit easier but when it comes outta nowhere especially I really really struggle, impure regression kicks in and all the sudden I'm a child who doesn't understand why everything is wrong, all I can do is cry, I hyperfixate on the feelings

I've tried sour candy and drinking lotsa waters and ashwagandha and music, the rational part of my brain says it's okay, everything is okay, life goes on, but my inner child screams and cries and begs for comfort I don't know how to give, I hate feeling this way so bad I'd give anything to not be this way

[redruffle41]

When I am really challenged with something in my life (like change) I don't handle it well.  I think that's maybe the definition of challenge. It seems to find me wherever my limit is and push me I to a frantic mind state.  I have grown so much so that I can handle many tough disappointments and hurts.  But sometimes I still manage to freak out. I'm not trying to anyone other than myself tho so......this is me. I think it's a valid response to dislike emotional anguish. That's the caring part of yourself. You have tried many things to be well. Those attempts haven't worked right now. You will find out what DOES work. Bc eventually something WILL work. Be it a stuffie, a hug, talking to a friend, sleep, or even just time. This too shall pass? Bitter words when you're in pain sometimes I know. Good luck! (Ps, try not to be so upset that you're upset. I feel this might be the key to the longevity of a better relationship with yourself)

[MasterPhotog]

@BabyBri420 You're absolutely not alone in feeling this way — change can be so overwhelming, especially when it hits suddenly and without warning. That intense emotional pull you’re describing makes so much sense, and the way you’ve put it into words shows a deep self-awareness and strength, even in the middle of pain.

It’s okay that your inner child still needs comfort — they’re reaching out because they didn’t get what they needed back then, and you're doing your best now to listen and care. That in itself is powerful. The fact that you're trying things like music, water, and even Ashwagandha shows you’re actively reaching for healing, and that matters.

You're not broken. You're someone who feels deeply, and while it hurts, it also means you have the capacity for great empathy and growth. Be gentle with yourself — you're doing the best you can with incredibly hard emotions. And even though it doesn’t feel like it now, it can get easier. You're allowed to ask for support and to not have it all figured out right away.

Sending you so much kindness — you’re doing better than you think. 💛

[BabyBri420]

5 minutes ago, redruffle41 said:

When I am really challenged with something in my life (like change) I don't handle it well.  I think that's maybe the definition of challenge. It seems to find me wherever my limit is and push me I to a frantic mind state.  I have grown so much so that I can handle many tough disappointments and hurts.  But sometimes I still manage to freak out. I'm not trying to anyone other than myself tho so......this is me. I think it's a valid response to dislike emotional anguish. That's the caring part of yourself. You have tried many things to be well. Those attempts haven't worked right now. You will find out what DOES work. Bc eventually something WILL work. Be it a stuffie, a hug, talking to a friend, sleep, or even just time. This too shall pass? Bitter words when you're in pain sometimes I know. Good luck! (Ps, try not to be so upset that you're upset. I feel this might be the key to the longevity of a better relationship with yourself)

Thank you so much for the kind words it means the world, I definitely need to work on accepting and feeling the emotions, I grew up with "I'll give you something to cry about parents", not tryna shove things down is definitely something I need work on

[BabyBri420]

5 minutes ago, MasterPhotog said:

@BabyBri420 You're absolutely not alone in feeling this way — change can be so overwhelming, especially when it hits suddenly and without warning. That intense emotional pull you’re describing makes so much sense, and the way you’ve put it into words shows a deep self-awareness and strength, even in the middle of pain.

It’s okay that your inner child still needs comfort — they’re reaching out because they didn’t get what they needed back then, and you're doing your best now to listen and care. That in itself is powerful. The fact that you're trying things like music, water, and even Ashwagandha shows you’re actively reaching for healing, and that matters.

You're not broken. You're someone who feels deeply, and while it hurts, it also means you have the capacity for great empathy and growth. Be gentle with yourself — you're doing the best you can with incredibly hard emotions. And even though it doesn’t feel like it now, it can get easier. You're allowed to ask for support and to not have it all figured out right away.

Sending you so much kindness — you’re doing better than you think. 💛

Thank you so very muchly for these kind words, sometimes we all need a reminder we're stronger than we think, I definitely need work on accepting the emotions instead of tryna push em down and act okay 😅 it feels amazing to have my troubles translated into signs of strength, I very muchly appreciate that, thank you for the perspective truly

[redruffle41]

Yeah it feels good to feel good but we can't always have that. And it feels bad to feel bad but it's no reason to like, feel bad for feeling bad. Then, feel bad for feeling bad for feeling bad ....I mean, at some point it's like, STOP! Lol,stop the whole thing and just be. And gently kinda see what's wrong and kinda decide how to handle it and then see if that makes a difference. And if not then it's ok, don't freak out. And then like eventually you will feel better and then worse and then better and then horrible! Then better, then great.......oh blah dee, oh blah da....life goes on....

[beanbean]

1 hour ago, BabyBri420 said:

Does anyone else feel like change is the end of the world? Like nothing could be okay again and memories will never release their death grip on your heart, especially when it's really really sudden

If I can talk about things it's a bit easier but when it comes outta nowhere especially I really really struggle, impure regression kicks in and all the sudden I'm a child who doesn't understand why everything is wrong, all I can do is cry, I hyperfixate on the feelings

I've tried sour candy and drinking lotsa waters and ashwagandha and music, the rational part of my brain says it's okay, everything is okay, life goes on, but my inner child screams and cries and begs for comfort I don't know how to give, I hate feeling this way so bad I'd give anything to not be this way

Change can be scary but we have to be careful we get to careful that we don’t stunt are growth by just staying comfortable as well so like everything it’s a balance

[BabyBri420]

1 minute ago, beanbean said:

Change can be scary but we have to be careful we get to careful that we don’t stunt are growth by just staying comfortable as well so like everything it’s a balance

Dis is true 💜

[MasterPhotog]

@BabyBri420 Thank you so much for sharing this—it takes real courage to open up like that. You’re definitely not alone in this journey. Learning to sit with our emotions, especially when we were taught to hide or suppress them, is such a powerful and healing step. It’s okay to not have it all figured out—progress is slow and messy sometimes, but it is progress.

You are stronger than you think, and every time you choose to feel rather than bury what you're going through, you're showing just how strong you really are. I’m really glad the perspective helped—your vulnerability is a strength, and it’s inspiring to see you leaning into that. Keep being kind and loving to yourself 💛.

[.คℓ𝐞ﾒเᏰααα .ᐟ]

I don't handle sudden change well either. Because of my chronic illness, I literally have to plan ahead for everything. And I've learned that you can only plan what you know will happen, not what you can't control. So I plan what I can and hope for the best with what's beyond my ability. I've felt this has helped when things did change suddenly. There was still a sense of I did what I could, so things might have changed, but will be okay.

[MissAnna]

On 5/29/2025 at 11:19 AM, BabyBri420 said:

Does anyone else feel like change is the end of the world? Like nothing could be okay again and memories will never release their death grip on your heart, especially when it's really really sudden

If I can talk about things it's a bit easier but when it comes outta nowhere especially I really really struggle, impure regression kicks in and all the sudden I'm a child who doesn't understand why everything is wrong, all I can do is cry, I hyperfixate on the feelings

I've tried sour candy and drinking lotsa waters and ashwagandha and music, the rational part of my brain says it's okay, everything is okay, life goes on, but my inner child screams and cries and begs for comfort I don't know how to give, I hate feeling this way so bad I'd give anything to not be this way

Change can be so hard, it's as if one moment everything in your life is going okay and the next a hurricane comes throwing everything out the window you ever knew

Change can be terrifying, change can make you feel like you have no control over anything.

In those moments remember to breathe, to breathe and focus on the things you can control.

When I am faced with adversity and challenges, I remind myself that better days are coming my way. That this is only a stepping stone to something much greater. 

Don't be so hard on yourself, I promise it gets better with time. You are doing so incredible and I am so proud of you, I know everyone else on here is as well. 

Just don't give up okay 

 

 

[Dangerously_Well]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It sounds incredibly overwhelming to have change feel so catastrophic and for those memories to have such a strong hold. It's really tough when your inner child is in distress, and it's even harder when you feel powerless to comfort them.

It's important to acknowledge that this is a real and valid experience. Sudden change can be profoundly destabilizing, and it's not simply a matter of "being rational." Your feelings are real, and your inner child's pain is real.

You've already tried some coping mechanisms, which shows you're actively trying to find solutions. Sour candy, water, ashwagandha, and music are all valid, and it's good that you're experimenting. Sometimes, though, those things just don't cut it.

It's okay to feel this way. You're not "wrong" or "weak" for struggling. It's a testament to how deeply you feel and how much change impacts you.

Here are a few gentle thoughts:

• Self-compassion: Be kind to yourself. This is hard, and you deserve to be treated with gentleness and understanding, especially by yourself.
• Time: Sometimes, the intensity of these feelings does lessen with time. It might not feel like it now, but it's worth remembering that it won't be like this forever.
• Safety: Prioritize creating a safe space for yourself. Whether it's a physical space or a mental one, try to find somewhere you feel secure.
• Connection: If possible, reaching out to someone you trust can help. Even just having someone listen can make a difference.

You're not alone in feeling this way, and your feelings are important.

[BabyBri420]

2 minutes ago, Dangerously_Well said:

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It sounds incredibly overwhelming to have change feel so catastrophic and for those memories to have such a strong hold. It's really tough when your inner child is in distress, and it's even harder when you feel powerless to comfort them.

It's important to acknowledge that this is a real and valid experience. Sudden change can be profoundly destabilizing, and it's not simply a matter of "being rational." Your feelings are real, and your inner child's pain is real.

You've already tried some coping mechanisms, which shows you're actively trying to find solutions. Sour candy, water, ashwagandha, and music are all valid, and it's good that you're experimenting. Sometimes, though, those things just don't cut it.

It's okay to feel this way. You're not "wrong" or "weak" for struggling. It's a testament to how deeply you feel and how much change impacts you.

Here are a few gentle thoughts:

• Self-compassion: Be kind to yourself. This is hard, and you deserve to be treated with gentleness and understanding, especially by yourself.
• Time: Sometimes, the intensity of these feelings does lessen with time. It might not feel like it now, but it's worth remembering that it won't be like this forever.
• Safety: Prioritize creating a safe space for yourself. Whether it's a physical space or a mental one, try to find somewhere you feel secure.
• Connection: If possible, reaching out to someone you trust can help. Even just having someone listen can make a difference.

You're not alone in feeling this way, and your feelings are important.

Thank you so muchly 💜 I am doin a bit betters now, I've had someone very wonderful and kind to speak to who's helped me process and get out a lot and it's definitely made a huuuge difference!