A small thought

[MissAnna]

Lately, I’ve been feeling really sad. The kind of sad that drains motivation until even getting out of bed feels impossible. I tried to stay positive, to be uplifting, to push through it quietly.

Then I got really sick, most likely from chemo, it hit me hard, so hard I was crawling just to get into bed. Thankfully my stomach has settled, my body no longer aches or feels like it’s vibrating, and little by little, the sadness has started to loosen its grip.

I’m writing this because no one really knew how sad I was. I didn’t let anyone see it, I let the depression consume me until I didn’t even know where to begin anymore. I could barely keep a smile on my face, and I had no energy left for anything.

It made me start thinking about others. How many of the people who are always cheering others on have laid in bed wondering how they were going to get up because of depression? How many of the “strong” or “happy” ones are quietly carrying more than anyone realizes?

That thought broke my heart.

There were moments when I wrote small pieces about my sadness, but I never went deep. I never wanted others to see my true broken pieces my true sadness, how heartbroken and emotionally exhausted I was and how I couldn’t see past my own hands.

Looking back, that’s when I should have reached out. I should have let others in and allowed them to help ease the weight I was carrying.

I’m not sharing this for pity, and I’m not asking for concern or attention. I feel much better now than I did then. I’m sharing this as a reminder.

Please check on the ones who are always smiling. Let them know you care. Let them know you’re there to listen if they need a friend.

Because sometimes the people who spend their lives making others feel happy are the ones who need it the most.

Until next time, remember this: you matter, You are loved. And you are worthy of being loved.

-Miss Anna- 

[frantastic]

You are a very strong person. I have known other people who have had chemo. It's never easy. Thank you for being a person who cheers others on and thank you for the reminder to reach out to others who may secretly be having a bad time. You never know when someone needs a little extra light in their life.

[InspireDaddy]

When chemo had you broken, sick and dizzy. When darker times and depression took hold. When you were brought down to your very lowest... one of your first thoughts was still for other people and if they might need help... 😭like it or not, you are a truly special person. ❤️

... and yes you are right. Those who have felt or still feel deep pain, are often the quickest to offer support, because they are the ones who know how much a kind word or gesture can mean in a moment of darkness.

If you ever want to vent to a random 3rd party about how much of a struggle life can be, and how much energy it seems to want to take from you, I am here for you and I think so are a great many people on this forum.

[MissAnna]

40 minutes ago, frantastic said:

You are a very strong person. I have known other people who have had chemo. It's never easy. Thank you for being a person who cheers others on and thank you for the reminder to reach out to others who may secretly be having a bad time. You never know when someone needs a little extra light in their life.

Thank you for your kindness 

[MissAnna]

38 minutes ago, InspireDaddy said:

When chemo had you broken, sick and dizzy. When darker times and depression took hold. When you were brought down to your very lowest... one of your first thoughts was still for other people and if they might need help... 😭like it or not, you are a truly special person. ❤️

... and yes you are right. Those who have felt or still feel deep pain, are often the quickest to offer support, because they are the ones who know how much a kind word or gesture can mean in a moment of darkness.

If you ever want to vent to a random 3rd party about how much of a struggle life can be, and how much energy it seems to want to take from you, I am here for you and I think so are a great many people on this forum.

Thank you for being so kind to me and thank you for your kind offer 

[MasterPhotog]

13 hours ago, MissAnna said:

Lately, I’ve been feeling really sad. The kind of sad that drains motivation until even getting out of bed feels impossible. I tried to stay positive, to be uplifting, to push through it quietly.

Then I got really sick, most likely from chemo, it hit me hard, so hard I was crawling just to get into bed. Thankfully my stomach has settled, my body no longer aches or feels like it’s vibrating, and little by little, the sadness has started to loosen its grip.

I’m writing this because no one really knew how sad I was. I didn’t let anyone see it, I let the depression consume me until I didn’t even know where to begin anymore. I could barely keep a smile on my face, and I had no energy left for anything.

It made me start thinking about others. How many of the people who are always cheering others on have laid in bed wondering how they were going to get up because of depression? How many of the “strong” or “happy” ones are quietly carrying more than anyone realizes?

That thought broke my heart.

There were moments when I wrote small pieces about my sadness, but I never went deep. I never wanted others to see my true broken pieces my true sadness, how heartbroken and emotionally exhausted I was and how I couldn’t see past my own hands.

Looking back, that’s when I should have reached out. I should have let others in and allowed them to help ease the weight I was carrying.

I’m not sharing this for pity, and I’m not asking for concern or attention. I feel much better now than I did then. I’m sharing this as a reminder.

Please check on the ones who are always smiling. Let them know you care. Let them know you’re there to listen if they need a friend.

Because sometimes the people who spend their lives making others feel happy are the ones who need it the most.

Until next time, remember this: you matter, You are loved. And you are worthy of being loved.

-Miss Anna- 

@MissAnna Thank you for trusting us with something this tender. What you shared takes so much courage, especially after carrying it quietly for so long. I’m really sorry you went through that depth of sadness and the physical toll on top of it, no one deserves to feel that alone.

Your words are such an important reminder that strength doesn’t always look like smiling or pushing through, and that even the most giving hearts can be hurting deeply. I hope you know how much your honesty matters and how many people it will help feel less unseen.

I’m really glad to hear you’re feeling lighter now, even if it’s just little by little. You matter so much, and you deserve the same care and compassion you so freely give to others. Thank you for this reminder to check in, to listen, and to love more intentionally.

Please continue to be strong and know that you too are special, matter and loved 💛

[Daddy Bear 77]

I'm sorry you were feeling that way. What you were going through reminds me of one of my favorite poems that has often hit hard for me. 

Not Waving but Drownin

By Stevie Smith

 

Nobody heard him, the dead man,   

But still he lay moaning:

I was much further out than you thought   

And not waving but drowning.

 

Poor chap, he always loved larking

And now he’s dead

It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,   

They said.

 

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always   

(Still the dead one lay moaning)   

I was much too far out all my life   

And not waving

but drowning.

 

If any of you need someone to listen don't hesitate to message and if you find yourself feeling hopeless in the middle of the night call the crisis center. It's not just when you are afraid of hurting yourself but for when you are simply hurting and need someone. Also I downloaded chatGpT one night while deep in crisis after my first little and I broke up. I didn't want to be awake and I couldn't go to sleep and it talked me down, helped me ground and was a very hopeful spark in an incredibly dark night.  I hope you are feeling better and doing well ❤️. 

[MissAnna]

On 1/20/2026 at 8:27 AM, MasterPhotog said:

@MissAnna Thank you for trusting us with something this tender. What you shared takes so much courage, especially after carrying it quietly for so long. I’m really sorry you went through that depth of sadness and the physical toll on top of it, no one deserves to feel that alone.

Your words are such an important reminder that strength doesn’t always look like smiling or pushing through, and that even the most giving hearts can be hurting deeply. I hope you know how much your honesty matters and how many people it will help feel less unseen.

I’m really glad to hear you’re feeling lighter now, even if it’s just little by little. You matter so much, and you deserve the same care and compassion you so freely give to others. Thank you for this reminder to check in, to listen, and to love more intentionally.

Please continue to be strong and know that you too are special, matter and loved 💛

Thank you @MasterPhotogfor creating a safe space for people like me to allow our voices to be heard 

[MissAnna]

10 hours ago, Daddy Bear 77 said:

I'm sorry you were feeling that way. What you were going through reminds me of one of my favorite poems that has often hit hard for me. 

Not Waving but Drownin

By Stevie Smith

 

Nobody heard him, the dead man,   

But still he lay moaning:

I was much further out than you thought   

And not waving but drowning.

 

Poor chap, he always loved larking

And now he’s dead

It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,   

They said.

 

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always   

(Still the dead one lay moaning)   

I was much too far out all my life   

And not waving

but drowning.

 

If any of you need someone to listen don't hesitate to message and if you find yourself feeling hopeless in the middle of the night call the crisis center. It's not just when you are afraid of hurting yourself but for when you are simply hurting and need someone. Also I downloaded chatGpT one night while deep in crisis after my first little and I broke up. I didn't want to be awake and I couldn't go to sleep and it talked me down, helped me ground and was a very hopeful spark in an incredibly dark night.  I hope you are feeling better and doing well ❤️. 

I am feeling better thank you for your kind words and your poem is absolutely beautiful. And I agree we tend to curl into ourselves not allowing ourselves to be seen afraid others might see the cracks in our already crumbling house. 

ChatGPT is a beautiful tool and I'm glad it helped you, sometimes we have to take it one day at a time