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Hard To Talk About Topics (Self-Harm, Depression, Anxiety etc.)


Angelicpearl
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"I don't feel happy but I don't feel sad. I don't feel stressed or overwhelmed. I just feel like I want to sleep. Like a weight is on my chest but I can't pinpoint what it is. Like a ball of emotions that are just piled up from who knows how long. When I try and describe how I'm feeling to someone it always comes off as "meh" or "numb". But I'm not really numb, I can feel, I know what's going on around me. I guess, I guess maybe I just don't care anymore. Like I have a weight on my chest and every day is like the rest and nothing exciting or new happens and when a little something happens that starts to rock the boat, I feel like I'm sick. Feel like I"m gonna fall over and pass out. I don't want to talk to anyone, look at anyone, eat or go anywhere, I just want to lay in bed and sleep. Cause when I'm asleep, I don't think. When I don't think, the weight is gone. When I don't talk, no one listens, no one is annoyed. When I have my eyes closed, I dream, dream about a better place where everyone I know is happy and everything in life is perfect. I don't know how to describe this feeling. I guess I'm just here. Here to exist. Here to live every day like the last. Here to talk to the same people about the same things. Here to be hurt by the same people, in the same ways and still forgive them for it. But...I don't want to be just here...and I guess that's the problem." 

 

Sometimes feelings like this are hard to talk about. But, I want you to know, you're not alone. You are strong. You are beautiful/handsome. You are kind. You are smart and you are loved. I may not know you personally, or at all for that matter. But to me, that doesn't matter. You're alive, you have a purpose and therefore, I care about you. And if you feel like no one else does, then know that I DO. I CARE. I LOVE YOU. You are an amazing human being. Even on your worst days. You're not alone and if you ever need someone to talk to about anything or just need someone to listen to you, I want you to know that I am here. 

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Guest princesshoneybear

I felt that too before knowing about ddlg, but now i found and embracing my inner child, and found my emotional support system too i can be happier and stronger ^^

Thanks for writing this, its beautiful ❤

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I really needed this tonight. My depression and anxiety hasn't been as bad as it used to be now that I found my little side but the past few days have been really tough. I haven't been feeling wanted by my Daddy the past couple of days and it's been really hard on me. I know he doesn't mean to act this way but it's a feeling I can't shake. So reading this tonight helped. Thanks

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  • 1 month later...

I have depressions for about 10 years now. Never did any kind of selfharm. Everyday i feel like i'm existing just to exist and suffer. 'But life goes on' i think 'everything gets better'. EVERY. DAY.

 

It's never gotten better, nothing helped, neither psychotherapists nor medication. I just life on. Nobody outside my family ever cared that much about me to stay and try to help me, most of my family doesn't care too. But i'm alive. Still.

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  • 1 month later...

I suppose daddies have to suck it up and seem like they are strong on the outside, just like in real life... Any thoughts ?

 

Daddies dont have to suck it up, as much as you're here for us, we should be for you. It is a relationship after all. :)

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