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Balancing Act: Being a Little Adult In a DDLG Relationship


LilBlue21

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Hi hi,

 

A little context: I have really bad anxiety and depression, which sometimes causes me to overthink my behavior and my relationships.

 

I started talking to this Daddy a little over a week ago, and It’s been amazing. I feel so comfortable and happy around him, but my anxiety is starting to creep in... I’m getting nervous that I’m being a bother, by being little too much for him to get to know me outside of my little headspace or not little enough times for him to see who I am as a little.

 

Any advice about how to get over this fear would be extremely helpful. Thank you!❤️

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all of the feelings you are experiencing are very common with many littles. I know the fears that come upon you are very real. My experience has taught me the only way that you can manage those fears is by good communication and trust with anyone you are in a relationship with. Don't be afraid to tell the daddy you are chatting with the feelings you are having. A good daddy will understand those feelings as a part of what you struggle with and not judge you. It may take some time for the fears to totally go away, but with love and understanding from the daddy you are chatting with, you can manage those fears. From my point of view I would suggest you to express your concerns with the daddy you are chatting and that may help relieve some of your anxiety. You also need to trust him when he tells you that he accepts you for who you are no matter what your struggles are.  Be patient with yourself. I hope my words help you in some way. Good luck

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Well, long story short you're not alone and even as a Dom/Daddy, I know I have feelings at times that I'm being too overbearing or giving too much attention. So it's definitely a two way street there.

The bad news is there's no blanket solution. Each person is different so you'll need to talk to him about it. The good news is generally speaking, one of the basic expectations of DDlg is at least some level of being clingy and needy. And generally the idea for a Daddy is it brings out our protective nature. In other words, you will be expected to need a lot of attention and it would be expected that we are eager to provide that when reasonably possible.

 

Personally I like when this is brought up when I start to get to know a girl. Because it gives me a chance to reassure them that you are not a bother at all. In fact one of my rules that I had with my first little falls into this sort of thing: "“Spamming” messages is acceptable at all times." I really enjoy coming back and having several messages and eager to reply back immediately when I can. But back on the point, as much as I hate giving a vague answer, you really need to talk to him about it. hopefully he'll say it's fine. Hopefully he'll go above and beyond in saying something along the lines that he WANTS you to bother him.

 

As far as being a little too often, that's another thing to talk about. Maybe he could take some time to offer you a set schedule for it if there is some sort of issue. Then again there may be no issue at all and he loves it. It really just matters by what he wants and what you want.

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Hi, hi!!!


my Daddy and i are still pretty new in our dynamic and whenever i have thoughts like this, 


my Daddy reminds me to communicate them, even if i think it's silly or stupid!!!


Having open communication is so super important in a dynamic where we're so vulnerable, right? 


 


So i'd suggest just talking to him about all the anxiety you're feeling. 


:heart:


Edited by babybot
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  • 2 weeks later...
Thanks everyone for all the responses!!! I know this is a late reply, but I’ve since spoken to him about it he seems fine, even happy about my clinginess. But I’m currently trying to make long distance work, which is another story.
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Golden rule for making relationships of any kind work is to know your feelings, own your feelings, and communicating them. Figure out what you are feeling. Accept you are feeling them. Tell your Daddy what you are feeling. That way, you give your Daddy the chance to rise to the occasion and take care of you and reassure your anxieties.

 

Feelings can often not be rooted in reality and even be downright wrong. But they don’t have to be right, they just have to tell you something about yourself. It sounds like you have needs that are not being met. No worries, just tell your Daddy about them. ^^ That way your Daddy can trust you to look out for yourself and he won’t have to try to read your mind. It’s inhumane to expect anyone to just know what’s going through your head because you’re a complex, nuanced person.

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