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What are daddies looking for


xnkal;
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Hi there, I am sincerely to know what are caregivers or daddies are looking for in a relationship. I somehow understand that as an adult to request for attention from another adult is not really common and making sense. That is somehow my nature is. 

 

I honestly feel kind of guilty for being not independent. And I doubt that there will be a man will take care of me as a child out of the desire of being a daddy to a stranger.

 

I want to know what you guys as caregivers looking for in a DDLG relationship. Or what motivates you to take care of another adult in a parental way. What we as little can do that deserve this kind of kindness.

 

If you are experienced, I would appreciate if you can explain how to make this type of relationship work. There are topics hard to escape. And I hope to get the answer.

 

1.Financial arrangements: Is daddy taking care his girl financially, assuming is fully, common or making sense? If not, how to arrange the financial responsibility without hurting the “roles”?

 

2.sexual interactions: Is sex involved in a DDLG relationship usually? Will it feel like incest. If sex is necessarily involved, how to avoid or reduce the confusion of the roles. Many thanks.

 

 

 

 

 

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Hi there, I am sincerely to know what are caregivers or daddies are looking for in a relationship. I somehow understand that as an adult to request for attention from another adult is not really common and making sense. That is somehow my nature is. 

 

I honestly feel kind of guilty for being not independent. And I doubt that there will be a man will take care of me as a child out of the desire of being a daddy to a stranger.

 

I want to know what you guys as caregivers looking for in a DDLG relationship. Or what motivates you to take care of another adult in a parental way. What we as little can do that deserve this kind of kindness.

I never had children nor want any but the DDLG dynamic would allow me to experience a little of what it's like to care for and raise someone. It would be mostly role playing although some littles are living that way more full time than not.

 

 

 

If you are experienced, I would appreciate if you can explain how to make this type of relationship work. There are topics hard to escape. And I hope to get the answer.

 

1.Financial arrangements: Is daddy taking care his girl financially, assuming is fully, common or making sense? If not, how to arrange the financial responsibility without hurting the “roles”?

 

 

Every relationship differs. Some littles need complete care giving. They do not work and do not want to. Some have careers and jobs and like that part of their big self and use "little space" as an escape and vaca from adult life.

 

 

2.sexual interactions: Is sex involved in a DDLG relationship usually? Will it feel like incest. If sex is necessarily involved, how to avoid or reduce the confusion of the roles. Many thanks.

 

 

Personally I don't think little space should be sexual at all but I'm sure some dynamics do involve it.

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Well DDLG relationship at it's base aren't that much different from vanilla relationships. At the end of the day it comes down to how well you connect with a person, how that person makes you feel, how you compliment eachother... You can look at Dom/sub, DaddyDom/little as just another sexual orientation (even if the dynamic is not sexual). Doms are inheritly attracted to subs and vice versa.

 

So what I look for in a relationship is a genuine connection with the person in question, just like people who are vanilla. And there's people who are vanilla , that want way more attention than most littles/subs. It depens on the individual and how they are wired. And likewise there are people who like that attention and for someone to rely on them like that. That being said, you should still work on being more independant and try not to rely on your significant other too much. A Dom is there to guide you and provide more structure in your life, to help you grow as a person. If he just babies you all the time and gives in to your every whim, then that's something that should be seen as a red flag. Sure you will feel good, protected and safe, but as a person you will regress.

And here's the answer to your question , what you can do to deserve such kindness. A DD gets fulfilled just by guiding and caring for you, but what you can do, so that you yourself feel deserving of that, is try to be more independent, try to become the best version of yourself and not just mindlessly rely on Daddy 24/7. 

 

Financial arrangements, hmm. Well I personally have never fully provided for my sub financially, but that's because I am generally attracted to strong independent women. Sure I'd treat, organise trips and what not, but we were both independent otherwise. Tho I know many other couples/dynamics where the Dom fully provides for the sub financially, and both of them are happy like that. It depends on the individuals in question. Like humanmusic said above me, every dynamic is unique.

 

Sexual interactions. While I am a very sexual person, I do not mind having non-sexual dynamics since they still fulfill me in their own right. Now will it feel like incest? That depends on the people in question. Some littles do not want to be seen in a sexual way , while others do. If you look at some littles' profiles, you'll see that many say they are a nymphet. That basically means that even though they are little , they still want to be seen in a sexual way. There is no right or wrong in dynamics, the only question is if all the parties involved are comfortable with eachother.

Edited by Barney048
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What I look for in any woman or submissive / little, is likely different than a lot of others. Mainly I look for someone who I can help improve. Someone who isn't just a pushover, that we can both learn from each other and grow together. Usually I can tell fairly fast if it's worth giving it a shot. I rarely date subs or littles. I look for someone who without even trying captures My attention. I don't worry about what's happening on BS social media, news, drama, or even look at My phone when I am with them. (Usually this is the first indication for Me.)

 

For your Questions

1. Financial arrangements: I don't desire to have to hold their hand 24/7, trying to make them 100% dependent on Me, Micromanage their life, or finances, or combine them with Mine. Instead if they need assistance or guidance in that area I help them out. 

     A. Caregivers should take into account, if you do have someone 100% relying on you for everything: What will happen to them if you're killed? Or need surgery, or some unforeseen issue that takes you out of the picture, possibly in a permanent way. If you do take care of someone who for whatever reason is 100% dependent, I hope there's a back up plan if you're out of the picture suddenly. 

     B. Instances I had to aid a submissive I had in real life with some long distance before we lived together: She bounced a couple checks and the consequences were really stressing her out. Some might just cover her bounced checks, but I'm a Daddy not a sugar daddy. Instead I explained to her, as long as she called the bank, and explained her situation and asked if they could set up a payment plan, she'd likely be just fine. 

 

2.Sexual interactions: Relationship wise I've always had a Sexual side with the subs / littles I've had. If they have some Taboo kinks, I am Okay with that. There's nothing wrong with role play with two consenting adults. If it's that taboo. Then don't go telling strangers about it around the water cooler at work. 

I've also stepped in for some Caregiver role, or Protector in the BDSM side that wasn't sexual, but most times... It end up sexual. Sometimes even a Mistress, Domme, Mommy needs someone to vent to, or share ideas with. 

 

Over all if it's a relationship and not just a one time scene / role play with someone. As long as there's balance, and both sides are being fulfilled it's what I seek. I like to teach My girl as well as learn from her. You can learn from anyone if you have an open mind and keep your eyes open. 

 

Hope this helps. 

Best Wishes in your adventures. 

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Depends on the Dynamic between the Little and CG. A good deal of them are mutual emotional support and when I say mutual there is give and take as mentioned above as in all real relationships. You don't have someone that's acting Little hours a day and a Big that is taking care of their every little whim for 'nothing' unless someone is off. 

 

I imagine love is a huge part of the dynamic and intimacy and if there is a financial arrangement there is probably a reason for that specifically being that one person is much older or the other is much more attractive...

 

All that said, the relationships I see last are where everything is even. Someone isn't Little 24-7. That never works. . . In my experience at least can you imagine having a Little that is never an adult really, is helpless and you have to carry them around. Why not go and have an actual person with an adult or adopt? Why go through picking someone that will never be an adult? That I have experience with someone that was mentally unstable and unable to be an adult when I needed them to be. It's so unstable. PTSD and other issues will cause this and if they don't tell you or you find out as you get to know the real them you will be very shocked and scared. Dealing with it isn't for the faint at heart!

Edited by DaddyLovesStars
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What you are describing sounds more like a codependent relationship and that is just not healthy. Please read about this, also read about slaves in BDSM dynamic, as a slave you give up more control and that what you might be into (I have my slave moments/moods) and if that it's ok, but the following applies:

 

You should not feel guilt... because it's either not 24/7 or you make up for it by taking care of your partner in other ways (yes, even as a little you can take charge and take the wheel if needed).

 

And noo incest feel because they are not actually replacing your parents. Some people might have an incest fetish and might like to roleplay but in the end, this is not what it is, even the fetish and roleplay are limited to the bedroom or a time frame or whatever.

Edited by Nymph
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Well I can't speak for anyone but myself, I'm looking for a little who has balance between her little space and big space, someone who can carry a conversation with me (they can be shy as long as they try to open up), I want someone I can see myself forming a deep connection with. For me it's not about money, that would be a red flag for me personally. If other daddies are ok with making that part of thier dynamic I wouldn't judge. People should be able to do what they want. A profile with stuff on it more than a couple of lines will get a lot of daddies attention. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

For me, as what I would describe as a "service sub daddy", I relish confidence in what Princess expects of me. I certainly don't want her to feel any kind of guilt. I have the most amount of energy in service sub space, so her being confident in her power and control in the relationship is important to me, because it energises me to give her what she needs. When she is vulnerable, and a special kind of caregiving is required, I see that as part of my service duty. It's so much easier for me when she can confidently say "daddy, I need XYZ" without any guilt or a sense of inconveniencing me. I then have to determine the best way to accomplish that. I'm a type of daddy who performs best with direct orders, and her feeling the confidence to give me those orders is very important to me. That doesn't mean she always gets everything she demands. It just means she has the confidence to push me and that's what makes my brain fire in this kind of dynamic.

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For me, as what I would describe as a "service sub daddy", I relish confidence in what Princess expects of me. I certainly don't want her to feel any kind of guilt. I have the most amount of energy in service sub space, so her being confident in her power and control in the relationship is important to me, because it energises me to give her what she needs. When she is vulnerable, and a special kind of caregiving is required, I see that as part of my service duty. It's so much easier for me when she can confidently say "daddy, I need XYZ" without any guilt or a sense of inconveniencing me. I then have to determine the best way to accomplish that. I'm a type of daddy who performs best with direct orders, and her feeling the confidence to give me those orders is very important to me. That doesn't mean she always gets everything she demands. It just means she has the confidence to push me and that's what makes my brain fire in this kind of dynamic.

your type is certainly different lol. It is just taking care of your little give you some sort of self satisfaction? Do you expect some type of rewards?

 

And, any restrictions. Can I say she is actually the dom in this relationship

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  • 2 months later...

I and my bf do it sometimes. Haven't in quite a while, but it wasn't weird for us at all. For us is just like using toys. Just like some people use "baby" as a term or endearment... and this makes me feel more desireю. "Daddy" is the same way for him. 

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