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Online Daddys and Little's


doloreshaze

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Has anybody ever had a strictly online (Skype sessions, ect.) daddy or little? How did it work out? I'm wanting to explore being a little from a rural area, so this seems to be my best option for now. I just want to hear people's experiences with this, pros, cons,...

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Guest ~*~Sachita~*~

Hello and Welcome doloreshaze 

 

Yes, there  are purely online/long distance ddlg relationships.

All mine have been online in the past.

 

I do think it's a good way.. the safest way.. to start exploring ddlg.

Others may disagree.

 

The pros are like any other online relationship. It can be very rewarding and intimate.

The cons ? Obviously no physical contact.

Most scary I think.. is not knowing if your partner is being honest. (Easier to tell in real life I think).

 

The most hurtful is when one half becomes bored/disinterested,

and just abandons the other.. ('ghosting' I'm sure you've heard of).

Lots of people today view people online as.. disposable. Be careful.

People can hurt online as much as in real life. So really be careful.

 

Some distance relationships stay that way.. or may come to an end (just as with real life).

Some begin online, and develop into a real life relationship, with one of both, relocating.

 

My advice to you is.. read lots on the forum, make some friends you can talk with, and take your time.

 

Don't rush. Don't be rushed.

 

Very best of luck to you :)

Edited by hurtnolivingthing
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Although I haven't been in an online DD/lg relationship, I've been in several long term online relationships. I've also been in an online D/s relationship.

 

As far as my relationships and how they worked out. The first one, met after about 4.5 years, was a typical relationship of two immature teenagers, and failed by the time I was 19. The second, met after less than 1 year, was a horrific experience that caused significant emotional and financial damage, and still haunts me. The third, met after less than 1 year, went great and we now live together and are engaged.

 

Pros:

-If you are dating online, you will have a lot more options since you are not restricted to just people in your general area. You'll have a better chance of finding the partner you are looking for.

-Convenience, less effort. You don't have to plan a time and place to go meet up, get dressed, or play your day around your date. You can chat with your new partner while you are sick, eat, clean, pick your nose, whatever. 

-Increased privacy. Need to go to the bathroom? Say brb. Need to cough? Mute the mic. 

-Your body and your belongings are safe. As long as it remains online, you do not give away personal info such as your address, and don't fall for a scam like remote access to your computer or sending money, then you do not have to worry about being robbed or being physically hurt.

-More time to decide on how far you want to take things. If you plan to date for a long while before meeting, then you get to skip out pressure on introducing to friends, inviting to your home, etc.

 

Cons:

-You run the risk of being ghosted, should your partner become too busy, stressed, or lose interest. 

-Trust could be a big issue, especially if you are doing video sessions that could result in non-consensual video recording or screenshots, possibly even without your knowledge at all.

-Trust again, the person could easily hide things about their life. Ex: A spouse, drug addiction, etc.

-Through text, emotion can easily be misinterpreted. Your partner might type something feeling sad, but you read it as rude and angry. They could type something intending to be sarcastic, you you read it as a serious tone. You can't hear the voice, you can't see the body language, and that can make getting to know someone a potentially slow and confusing process.

-Through video, connection delays can make it seem like the other is disinterested or being fake. You also lose the ability to see your partner's immediate reaction to your actions/what you are saying. Further, you may not be able to see all of the body language, small gestures, and muscle movements that speak as loud if not louder than words.

-Yearning. Let's say you meet an incredible match. There's a chance that a sad yearning will take over, due to the fact you can't actually meet face-to-face.

-You can talk for hours and hours and video chat for hours, but you will still not know many of the things about the person that makes them... them. Little habits that they might not even be aware of, good or bad. Their subconscious reactions to various situations. Etc. 

-Physical contact is of course nonexistent. Oxytocin is a nice thing, not having it is not a nice thing.

-When you do meet, there is a chance you find yourself to not even be comfortable with the person even though you have been video chatting and talking with them for a very long time. So it's like partially restarting the relationship. Of course, not the same for all people. 

-100 photos, and 25 hours of Skype sessions later, the image you have in your head of your partner still might not be all too accurate of what they actually look like.

-No contact is just a power outage away.

-DD/lg: You may find yourself feeling very little, and needing your CG, but unable to contact them due to lack of signal, busy, etc.

-DD/lg: Reward and punishments could be delayed. You might do something great and not be able to be praised for it until 6 hours later, or you might be something bad and it goes unaddressed for 4. Also, it requires you to be responsible and honest enough to tell your CG when you've done something wrong. Otherwise, the experience isn't full. 

-DD/lg: There are some things you might want to try as a little with your CG that will not be available to you. Your CG can not pick you up, push you on a swing, put your paci in your mouth, etc.

Edited by Misha
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I always found the hardest part to be not being with them in person and not being able to have cuddles. Misha definitely hit the nail on the head with all the pros and cons.

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Yeah i have done the online thing many times over many years and the one inescapable conclusion i've come to (through my own personal experience) is that they never work out without being able to physically meet up.

 

Eventually one or both parties realise that the relationship needs are not being met in some way, generally (again from my experience) it always comes down to the fact that as Angel24 mentioned without being able to be physically together there's too much missing from the dynamic. All the tools and tech we have available, it sadly can't put you in the same room physically.

 

If it is long distance in the same country then i think there is more chance of being able to physically meet up so it can work out as a means to lead up to phyiscally meeting and satisfying that in person need unless you live in a large country. Here in the UK there's only about 8hrs worth of distance from top to bottom roughly speaking so an in person meeting is quite possible.

 

Don't get me wrong online LDR they can be fun and interesting and if you have no other way of meeting people into ddlg then they are ok as you can have a lot in common with the people you meet and they clearly do work for some people so Misha's pro's and con's totally spot on. But if physical touch and closeness is something you need as it is for me, i found the not being able to snuggle, kiss, hold my little's hand, read her a story with her head resting on my chest or brush her hair etc. many of the most fun and relaxing things so yeah i can't bare it, it's pretty torturous. Also randomly being ghosted by my little is the hardest thing especially when you really like them :(.

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Guest BabygirlSarah1

Has anybody ever had a strictly online (Skype sessions, ect.) daddy or little? How did it work out? I'm wanting to explore being a little from a rural area, so this seems to be my best option for now. I just want to hear people's experiences with this, pros, cons,...

 

Thats the  only way my  Little -Caregivers  relationships have been & for me it  has &  still gives me the  opportunity to live out  my little role  (in my case its  Online role playing  )  &  as i said for me  its been GREAT& for me its pretty mush all i have in regarding  Little Vs Caregiver so i gratefully take  it  :wub:    

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